So I was sitting in the Starbuck's (my home away from home) with Le Ninja Nouveau. Both of us were supposed to be working, instead we sat looking out at the rain chatting about random thoughts as they crossed our minds. Into this calm entered an African-American couple bickering. I'd put them in their mid-twenties. Dude and Dudette were beefing (loudly) about plans for their upcoming wedding.
They paused long enough to order coffee and pastries. After they plunked down next to us, the argument started again. His phone rang, he looked at it, glanced at her and then answered. This set Dudette off, "It betta not be who I think it is." She reached over, took his phone, looked at the display and put the phone to her ear, "B*tch, I told you if you kept coming around my man I would kick your ass!"
White people looked dismayed at this overt display of blackity-blackness and commenced fleeing the premises. Ninja and I had the sour "why it gotta be this" faces on. Dude was straight wrestling Dudette to get his phone back. Dudette was telling the girl to come up to the Starbuck's so they could settle this right now.
Starbuck's worker came over and asked Le Ninja Nouveau if he knew Dude and/or Dudette. Ninja gave the worker a laser beam side-eye and said, "Contrary to what you've heard, we don't all know each other." I snickered. Worker fled. Dudette has hung up the phone and commenced talking loud to anyone who would listen. She turned to me, "I'm gonna kick that b*tch's ass when she gets here."
Le Sigh. Me, "Why?"
Her, "She's after my man. She doesn't respect our engagement."
Me, "Then your problem is with him. He's the one you're in a relationship with, not her."
Dude piped up, "Hey!"
Le Ninja chimed in, "It's your job to shut down all this drama."
Me, "Get some pride about yourselves. Y'all squabbling all up in the Starbuck's, scaring white people. You need to go home and have a conversation. It's So Not Bougie to be screaming about ass kicking in the street."
Her, "I'm not bougie." [<~~~obviously]
Me, "You're young - you still have time to ascend."
They stood looking at us like we were from a different planet. They went, picked up their order and ran out... like we were the ones disturbing the peace. Classic.
I don't know if she understood what I was saying. It mattered not. Here's my point - no fighting over men. (Or women for that matter) On this, the bougie rule is clear - your issue is with your significant other, not the extra. Your s.o. needs to understand the significance of their actions. Continuously answering phone calls from people that you have stated you have a problem with is a violation. Violations are punishable up to and including loss of relationship privileges.
I remember one s.o. tried to test me. We were hanging out with some friends and he invited a chick that he knew I could not stand. Maybe because of this direct quote she dropped on me, "You just need to step outta the way so I can get at him. I don't know what he sees in you anyway." For real though? For some reason, he decided it would be fun to invite her out and see what happened. What happened was everyone could tell I was ticked she was there and made sure she felt so uncomfortable that she left (fled) early. Then he received a talking to that he shan't soon forget and slept alone that night (and many others). Couldn't reach me on the phone for a few weeks after that. It wasn't tried again.
BougieLand, who's with me on this? Do we fight over s.o.'s? Seriously? Kicking azz in the coffee shop is what's hot in the streetz? Ladies and gents, what are the thoughts on scuffling for love?