Sooooo...
I got a ping on Facebook a month or so back from a woman (we'll call her Isshe - as in, Is She Kidding Me With This!) who wanted to know what I would think about my man spending time in the basement before he came up to bed every night. Wait for it...
He was spending time in the basement watching sex tapes of himself and his ex-mistress. Yep. Isshe wondered if she should read something into that... Oh, and also... Dude (we'll call him WhatTha - you can guess why) had recently "loaned" ex-mistress $10,000 of THEIR money for "reasons he didn't want to share." Isshe and WhatTha have been married for three years and he began this behavior three months ago. Isshe doesn't know what she should do or if she should even be upset.
So many questions. One - when Isshe called naked-sex-tape-woman (NSTW) an ex-mistress, what does this designation mean? Mistress implies one who is in a relationship with a married man. Was NSTW a former extramarital of WhatTha during this marriage or was he married before? Either way, EITH-ER WAY, it is not cool (So Not Cool) for him to have and watch cocoa videos of him and the ex but especially not before coming to bed with the new. Nawl.
Next question, 10k? 10 large? Diez mil dolares? My dollars? Even if you are ballin' like that, fund disbursement over $200 must be discussed and agreed upon before it goes out the door. ESPECIALLY to your husband's ex-whatever. Isshe, girl - woman up. You are being played so hard, we should nickname you XBox. I cannot. Surely you know the answers before you wrote in? None of this is okay. Not remotely. By zero stretches of the imagination. But hey, do you...
Then as if she didn't like the answers I had given her, I got another message a few weeks later from someone using a different name asking this:
Um...
*flings monitor off desk*
I'm out. Bougieland, what ya'll got for Isshe?