Comments on BougieLand: Just in time for Black History Month, I'm forced t...

I made this for a bunch of my friends to wear on t...

2010-09-15T19:49:16.385-05:00

I made this for a bunch of my friends to wear on t-shirts immediately after McCain made that statement...

If you want me to fashion one to reflect your sentiment, let me know and I will see what I can do =]

Your experience with the Hollywooders makes me won...

2010-09-15T19:49:13.917-05:00

Your experience with the Hollywooders makes me wonder how "Eve's Bayou" ever got made. One of the things I found most fascinating about the film was its nonchalant depiction of upper middle black life before the civil rights era.

As to my own "amusing" work story. Asked if I was interested in the office basketball team. Politely declined. "Why?", I was asked, jokingly. "Did I think I was too good?" Blank stare at the response that I never learned to play, but if they ever started a competive volleyball team, let me know.

Sad but true. I'm rushing to get my black ass ...

2010-09-15T19:49:06.824-05:00

Sad but true. I'm rushing to get my black ass ready for work, I wanted to chime in real quick. I haven't read all the comments so forgive me if I copy someone else's sentiments. You know us Black folk are good for stealing.

Anyway, the funny thing about all of this is...when people request you to "act more black" which is the equivalent of saying you "aren't black enough." At the same time if you did act "black enough" they would scowl and be too good (or intimidated) to deal with you in all your "blackness" to begin with.

lose/lose situation.

This also goes for those militant blacks who are a...

2010-09-15T19:49:06.457-05:00

This also goes for those militant blacks who are always swearing what they'd do in front of The Man but have never had to actually mix it up with said Man (at work, school, dorm, nothing). Being multi-culti is a unique dance that challenges even the most rhythmic of us.

I contend that living while black AMONGST whites is just as hardcore (and as much of an authentic black experience) as these manufactured ghetto tales I hear on the radio.

Sounds like the script for a typical "urban&q...

2010-09-15T19:49:06.022-05:00

Sounds like the script for a typical "urban" KFC or Mickey D's commercial.

I wish we were post-other races defining blackness...

2010-09-15T19:49:05.690-05:00

I wish we were post-other races defining blackness for us. Hell, I wish we were post-blacks defining blackness for us.

Chin up, Chele. In 2003, Tyler Perry was in the same situation you're in: "Ya'll should HEAR the ideas that Fox has for Madea. They don't want any mention of Christianity, which just isn't gonna happen. And that's the least crazy of their ideas. I will keep turning these people down until I can do Madea my way."

That was back when Tyler sold his videos for $40+ (with S&H).

Enter LionsGate, BlockBuster, Target, cha-ching! and haters extraordinaire.

Btw, according to your quiz, I'm 0% black. "Black Pass Revoked!"

At least I can be pres-o-dent!

*shrug*

Love the avatar! I'm waiting for "Still T...

2010-09-15T19:49:05.348-05:00

Love the avatar! I'm waiting for "Still That One" '12 ;-)

I'm thinking about writing my dissertation abo...

2010-09-15T19:49:04.460-05:00

I'm thinking about writing my dissertation about this very subject (after I find a program that I fit into)...

Support your fellow Bourgeois!

(and I just realized how apropos my avatar was for this very post.... that was a great moment in political history)

All I can say to that those stories is "Wow&q...

2010-09-15T19:49:04.125-05:00

All I can say to that those stories is "Wow" - {{}} <-- virtual hug.

It can be so frustrating to have to represent the ...

2010-09-15T19:49:03.706-05:00

It can be so frustrating to have to represent the entire Black community just because you are the only Black person on the job. People are disarmed by your approachableness & inevitably they ask you all the questions they wanted but were afraid to ask.
When I was 19 I was theee only Black person working @ the GAP (district hq) & they asked me..."Do you guys tan?". UGH! Or how about when the closet bigotted suprvr on my husband's job gave him the old "you are so articulate & a CREDIT TO YOUR RACE" back handed compliment. Another experience he had @ work a coworker told him & his darker Dominican coworker that if they visited his home, he'd have to put the dog up because he "doesn't like Black people." RIDICULOUS. Or how about when a close friend of mine asked me about celebrity crushes & asked me who I thought was attractive. Immediately, she jumped in with guesses, "Denzel Washington? Will Smith". I cut her one of my sideline looks & said, "Brad Pitt" just to knock her off of her rocker. Like it wasn't "OK for me to think a person of a different ethnicity was attractive. I was mortified. She was what I thought to be one of the most liberal, open, generous, sincere persons I'd ever met period. It proved that no matter how progressive we may think we are, people are shackled (for lack of a better adjective) by preconceived ideas & judgements. They are no doubt effected by the media & personal experiences. I'll save the best for last. My boss one day told me that I didn't look all Black. I just laughed & asked him what he was talking about? He talked about my complexion & my features. Granted in this melting pot none of us can claim to be 100% PURE from the Motherland. It was a completely inappropriate comment. Wooo Saaa, Woo Saaaa.

I can't totally understand! I interviewed for ...

2010-09-15T19:49:03.233-05:00

I can't totally understand! I interviewed for a faculty position at an Ivy League institution. They didn't hire me and the only reason I heard was because I "wasn't black enough" with my light-skinned, proper English and advanced degrees! Plus, I didn't convince them that I embraced the "hip hop culture", WTH??? Keep it moving, someone will like the book the way it is!

I don't even know if I could adequately expres...

2010-09-15T19:49:02.769-05:00

I don't even know if I could adequately express the MANY side-eyes and blank stares I gave the stories in this post.

"black it up?" OHMIGOD I would've spit fire... and I would've "blacked it up" sho' nuff... but right inside that car and ::whew:: Ok. Lemme calm down. ::breathe::

Last year, a well-known historically black sorority requested a meeting with the office I work in. The topics they wanted to discuss spanned across a few lines and only intersected one or two of the 5 or 6 issues I work on. However, my boss's boss asked me to sit in on the meeting with him.

I knew IMMEDIATELY what it was about. There was really nothing I could bring to the meeting (aside from my obvious charm and quick wit) that my boss's boss didn't already know/would be able to relay. I toiled over what to do for weeks and I had all kinds of advice, ranging from "give him a piece of your mind" to "this could be an opportunity for you to shine, so shut up." One person gave me pretty sage advice for my situation: this could open the door for more opportunities to take meetings with him. Wait and see how it pans out.

Ultimately, I decided to wait to see how the meeting transpired before I determined, what, if anything to say to him. The meeting went well, I was able to shine and there were no requests for me to act a certain way. 2 months later, he asked me to join a meeting with him on some major issues, and I was the only black face in the room.

Having said all that, and even given the way it all worked out for me, I still question the way I handled it. No one wants to be the token black kid. It sucks and lawd Jeebus white people be trippin' with that.

What's more, since when did white people know what black is? THAT's the part that burns me up. How can you tell me about something you haven't lived not nary no day in all your privileged life.

I just took the quiz..guess what? I am really blac...

2010-09-15T19:49:02.427-05:00

I just took the quiz..guess what? I am really black. Yeah for me. I have been confuse all my life. (pure sarcasm)

Seriously, the reps from the movie production company are stupid. I laugh at the "quintessential ethnic moments".

SMDH :(

Congrats on your black status ;-)

2010-09-15T19:49:02.110-05:00

Congrats on your black status ;-)

Whew - I'm "black enough" - it was c...

2010-09-15T19:49:01.755-05:00

Whew - I'm "black enough" - it was close though. PS. don't be hating on a rib sammich ;-)

Great Post! I chuckled at some of the comments, ...

2010-09-15T19:49:01.410-05:00

Great Post! I chuckled at some of the comments, because it's amazing to me the things people say and think it's acceptable. I remember when I was in a training program with AT&T and was asked to attend a dinner for some students (from HBCUs) who were in town for a competition. The guy in HR who invited me said I was chosen because "we want to have more people like you in the program." Clearly, I could read between the lines and knew what he meant. In my reviews, it was always "she's so articulate and polished." While, my non-Black counterparts were getting more substantive comments.

In Corporate America it's like they want you to be extra-Black or they think you're trying to assimilate. I'm glad you stood up for yourself and didn't change your writing to be another stereotypical Black author. Lord knows we have enough of them already.

I blame the ignorance of the Black culture for thi...

2010-09-15T19:49:01.065-05:00

I blame the ignorance of the Black culture for this "Black enough" shyt.

I HATE IT.

Let's just try and keep calm and remind them that they are being completely idiotic and ignorant and its wrong to assume you know how anyone's lifestyle should be or not.

Chele, keep writing the way YOU WANT. I love the way you represent .....

The BougieTale is sad but expected. The quiz is hi...

2010-09-15T19:49:00.738-05:00

The BougieTale is sad but expected. The quiz is hilarious. I needed a laugh today.

FTW for the Black Sheep video in the beginning of ...

2010-09-15T19:49:00.389-05:00

FTW for the Black Sheep video in the beginning of the quiz! My black card was revoked... I'm okay with this. LOL!

I answered with what I thought were the most outla...

2010-09-15T19:49:00.052-05:00

I answered with what I thought were the most outlandish answers and got "truly black" - OneChele that is hilarious! We have to have sense of humor about it because otherwise we wold be crying and fighting all the time!

Heeeeeey now! I'm "black enough"!!! ...

2010-09-15T19:48:59.685-05:00

Heeeeeey now! I'm "black enough"!!! *doing the Roger Rabbit*

LOL..but seriously, that is a daggone shame! "Quintessential ethnic moments"...WTH? People act as if they don't know that they're being offensive, but you can't fool me....I give the *side eye* often...

Ugh. That falls under things never to ask black people.

In the words of Marvin Gaye - makes me wanna holla...

2010-09-15T19:48:58.826-05:00

In the words of Marvin Gaye - makes me wanna holla, throw up both my hands...

My first job as a trainer at a large "chain&q...

2010-09-15T19:48:58.436-05:00

My first job as a trainer at a large "chain" gym, we were setting up for the day. All of a sudden the manager says, "Steve, you wanna pick the music? Maybe spice it up with some rap or something?" I probably listened to less rap than half the white guys in there yet he singled me out in front of everybody. I just clenched my jaw and said - Naw man, whatever you have is fine. Of course everyone was like - oh he didn't mean anything by it. And that's the problem.

That token thing is a subject for an entire week o...

2010-09-15T19:48:58.006-05:00

That token thing is a subject for an entire week of posts for sure. Having grown up almost always being the only black in the room, class, meeting, restaurant. Sometimes you just have to grit your teeth. There is no way someone who hasn't been put in the situation regularly for years could understand or relate.