Comments on BougieLand: Workplace Villains: 5 dastardly co-workers to look...

Oh yes! Do we work together? Does Mr. Haterade sit...

2010-09-15T19:42:29.755-05:00

Oh yes! Do we work together? Does Mr. Haterade sit next to the bathroom? Because that's where we moved him. His desk is literally facing the bathroom door. LOL

Chele! You are reminding me why I don't miss c...

2010-09-15T19:42:28.252-05:00

Chele! You are reminding me why I don't miss corporate America: #1 works my nerves too much.

My horror story is a combo of #2, #3, #4. This co-worker is a mixture of all three. Inappropriate. Too chatty/familiar. All for the purpose of sneak attacks. Fortunately for me, I was slightly #5 because my ex-boss (who is very high on the company food chain) loved me and he managed Miss Horror Story's manager. Because I kept MHS at arm's length (meaning no intel for her), she resorted to BREAKING INTO my file cabinet to steal my notebooks (w/ ideas, project notes, contacts, etc.). I didn't have any proof that it was her other than my gut (but my gut never lies). In order to confront her, I chatted her up all the way down the hall until we reached the back of the building away from nosy co-workers. Then I dropped a few creative threats on her and finished off with the Sistagirl Look (you know it). When I was done, I saw her go run tell her friend (the person who originally brought me into the company) and I overheard "No! Not [Jazzzyone]. She's so nice. Maybe you misunderstood her..." And I smiled to myself.

Miss Horror Story had a habit of coming to my cube and sitting on my desk and putting her grubby hands on everything...because she hated when people did this to her and thought it would unnerve me. After confronting her about my notebooks, I started visiting her cube to touch and move all of her items around her desk. She got so aggravated that she started gritting her teeth and snatching her stuff out of my hands. I told her when I get my notebooks back, I'll have something to keep me busy again and won't have time to visit her. Those notebooks reappeared within the hour.

I don't miss having to play those corporate games at all.

I am feeling this post! Just was told there will b...

2010-09-15T19:42:22.282-05:00

I am feeling this post! Just was told there will be no bonuses or raises for "90%" of staff today. Doncha know Useless Suck-Up and Golden Child are in the 10% that will be getting them? Woo0saah! I need this job. I need this job. I need this job. <---chanting!

@ASmith - OneChele and I have long had an agreemen...

2010-09-15T19:42:20.860-05:00

@ASmith - OneChele and I have long had an agreement "there is no crying at work". Seriously, cannot handle the boo - to - hoo in the workplace. I've been the manager or co-worker that tosses over the Kleenex and the side-eye, no patience for it.

This is so timely! I just had my performance appr...

2010-09-15T19:42:18.209-05:00

This is so timely! I just had my performance appraisal from my butt-head boss today (think the used car salesman in the movie "True Lies") who is trying hard (and will succeed I know) to credit work I have done to other people. All the while trying to tell me that he is supportive of me. WTH? The stories I could tell about this sleeze bag. Yes, I am looking for another job-can not stand it much longer! However, what about the people that just refuse to answer a direct question? You straight up ask them a direct question that can either be answered with a yes or a no or be answered in a sentence or two. They respond with everything (emails, spreadsheets, Power Point presentations, etc.) except the answer to the question. My pet peeve!

Plucking knife out of back as I type. Devious b*tc...

2010-09-15T19:42:11.455-05:00

Plucking knife out of back as I type. Devious b*tches. Politely took my name off the report and handed it in. So my boss is giving me the side-eye "Diana, what have you been working on if not this?!" As you say, OneChele - hell yea I'm snitching. Had to show her the original files on my PC to prove that I originated the work in the first place. THEN she says, "Well what have you done to make your co-workers disrespect you so?" My answers, "I don't know why they won't let me be great." She didn't take my reference. I did a 'Ye shrug and walked back to my desk.

Riley friend, stay outta jail - times is hard and ...

2010-09-15T19:42:09.372-05:00

Riley friend, stay outta jail - times is hard and these fools ain't worth it!

Great list! I'd just add the Chatty Co-Worker ...

2010-09-15T19:42:08.173-05:00

Great list! I'd just add the Chatty Co-Worker - that person who stands in your door/cubicle and talks your ear off every day for hours - don't you have some work to do, buddy?!!!

i got 5 on it! (and i know some pretty good lawye...

2010-09-15T19:42:06.906-05:00

i got 5 on it! (and i know some pretty good lawyers)

What about the space cadet who just never gets it!...

2010-09-15T19:42:04.106-05:00

What about the space cadet who just never gets it! They are lost in their own world and if you aren't careful they'll suck you in there with them.

I'm bout 2 seconds from cutting this trifling ...

2010-09-15T19:42:03.547-05:00

I'm bout 2 seconds from cutting this trifling bitch at work. Now I'm out here hustling in the rain to handle some old bullshiggity she was supposed to hold down last week. Who got my bail money?

Bougie said: Apparently in this dream I was a cra...

2010-09-15T19:41:59.523-05:00

Bougie said: Apparently in this dream I was a crack ho standing out on street corners. THE HELL?

This. A holla!

I started ROTFLOL when I read this! My co-workers started looking at me like I was crazy.

Just got out of a lunch meeting with another villa...

2010-09-15T19:41:58.822-05:00

Just got out of a lunch meeting with another villain: the Long Talker. He's long-winded, rarely gets to the point and talks to hear himself speak - aargh!

The ones with the super-inflated sense of their ow...

2010-09-15T19:41:46.688-05:00

The ones with the super-inflated sense of their own worth are the WORST!

I've been the unfortunate HR person who has to...

2010-09-15T19:41:42.896-05:00

I've been the unfortunate HR person who has to have this conversation with Smelly. There's no nice way to tell someone to go home and not come back until the funk is gone.

We have one of these, we call her the Happy Hour H...

2010-09-15T19:41:42.048-05:00

We have one of these, we call her the Happy Hour Ho. She don't miss a happy hour and after bumming two drinks off somebody, she's going in. Having decimated the accounting department, I believe she's working her way through IT right now. We in marketing are keeping our heads down. (all of our heads!) Even after tequila, no likey the passaround chick.

How about the body odor dude/girl? Regardless of e...

2010-09-15T19:41:40.915-05:00

How about the body odor dude/girl? Regardless of ethnic or religious affiliation, there is no reason to come to work stank every day. I mean just ripe! Human Resources has stepped in and they even went as far as to move him to the last cube on the last row but doncha know that means he walks past everybody leaving a trail of funk nasty on the way? Soap, ninja - $1 a bar at Walmart!

You did not mention the office tramp (applicable t...

2010-09-15T19:41:40.460-05:00

You did not mention the office tramp (applicable to male or female). And some of these skanks aren't sleeping their way to the top, they are just spreading it like peanut butter waiting for jelly.

Your imagery had me pushing breakfast away. But I&...

2010-09-15T19:41:39.770-05:00

Your imagery had me pushing breakfast away. But I've seen this one up close and personal. Come ON economy - people need an exit strategy!

Oh Lord, stories like your BlackBerry adventure ta...

2010-09-15T19:41:38.566-05:00

Oh Lord, stories like your BlackBerry adventure take me back. You will find folks beef over EVERYTHING in the office. "You got a laptop?" "You're going to the conference in Miami?" "You got the promotion?" Yes, yes, and yes green-eyed people. If ya'll spent more time working and less time bitching, you might get something other than the side-eye!

I just fired The Operative yesterday. This cat was...

2010-09-15T19:41:36.263-05:00

I just fired The Operative yesterday. This cat was sending out shady emails but he was slick. He was going to other people's desks and sending from internet accounts. We finally "nanny-cam"med the whole 5th floor and caught him in the act. Treacherous ass! He almost ruined some lives with that stuff.

I sit next to number 2. God I want to like her, bu...

2010-09-15T19:41:34.730-05:00

I sit next to number 2. God I want to like her, but just when I start she does or says something that I CAN.NOT deal with. She whines about something or cries about something and I want to throw my shoe at her face.

She whines all the time about not being appreciated in her job. They don't pay enough (they don't pay ANY of us enough), they don't recognize her work (uhh... welcome to the club) they don't respect her (again... here's your membership card). I mean right down to being very vocal about wondering when they're going to DEMOTE a co-worker and take BACK the raise they gave her because even though the powers that be gave said co-worker more responsibility on paper, that hasn't translated to the "real world." It's not the co-worker's fault, she WANTS the responsibility, but it is what it is. When she started asking "so what are they going to do about her raise" I 'bout flipped my ish. SAT.DOWN. If you want a raise, carry your narrow behind in there and present your case, but being a jerk at your desk about it just makes you look stupid.

Oh and don't get me started on how she tried to play me and the 3 other people in our office who do my job/have my title. ::blood boils:: I 'bout went real life black girl, Oxygen network Snapped, I'm gonna lose my EFFIN mind on her yesterday. The powers that be in our office have finally saw fit to give us lowly people blackberries (not all 4 of us NEED them, but I'll tell you what, my work load demands one). The first one of us got hers yesterday afternoon and do you know this bish's eyes got big and said "Ya'll are getting blackberries?" Oh the DISGUST! You would've thought the office had the audacity to give us raises. She might as well have said, "you lowly bastards don't deserve computers!"

Ohmigoodness... amen for white people and the fear on their faces when you raise your voice, or else idk what all might've come out of my mouth.

'Scuse me while I go do some DEEP breathing.

AGH!

OneChele, you'd see more stuff about her in my tweets, b'cept she FOLLOWS ME ON TWITTER. GOODNESS!

Another category for: the bitter, cynical lifer wi...

2010-09-15T19:41:34.424-05:00

Another category for: the bitter, cynical lifer with Haterade running through their veins. We have this older dude who has literally worked at this company longer than I have been alive. And he is MAD about it, son! No idea is new to him, he's heard it all before. How he has survived round after round of layoffs is beyond me. Can always count on him to point out the one cloud in a sunny sky. Total downer.

Well I'm a professional dancer - the whole ran...

2010-09-15T19:41:31.601-05:00

Well I'm a professional dancer - the whole range from classic to stage show to hip hop so you would think we wouldn't have the same crazy characters from the corporate world... but we do and you can mix in the diva quotient as well. Dancers are cutthroat and will kick you in your hamstring given half a shot. I do have one "nemesis" of my own. A woman I've been competing with for two years for the same parts and featured dancer roles. She went as far as to spread the rumor that I was sleeping with Directors to get the roles I won and she lost. I still have to correct people who heard the rumor and think it's true. Evil!

And see, I would actually love my job if I could d...

2010-09-15T19:41:25.087-05:00

And see, I would actually love my job if I could do it from home where I don't have to seal with these crazy folks. So there's a new category for you OneChele - just plain crazy co-workers.