You ever have someone take something just one step too far? Yeah um.... read on:
Hey Chele,Thirty-something single black male here. I went out on a second date with a woman this Sunday. Brunch. Before I'd had a good sip of mimosa she announced that she would like to have a threesome and would I be down for that.
I paused since she and I had not as yet had any sort of relations. Seemed early to go that deep in the playbook. Yet my freak flag began to fly a little bit as I'm thinking two hot girls, me, oils, cocoa - it's about to go down. Then she says no, not two girls one guy. She wants another dude to join us. Freak flag down. Not so much. AND she names the guy (a friend of mine) that she wants in on the action.
I was already to hell no when she added that she wanted all of this to happen in a public place because she gets off on that kind of danger. Too much. Yo, I gotta moral turpitude clause in my employment contract, I can't just be wildin'. Even if I was so inclined, I'm about 10 years past the shenanigans. I now have boundaries to my freakiness. In the words of the prophets Hall & Oates - I Can't Go For That. Therefore, I bounced. My question is - is it just me or was she out of bounds? -OverIt
Dear OverIt -
Where on earth did you meet her and what was the first date? She was very comfortable with you quite quickly. She was a bit over the top for the middle of a Sunday at brunch with a guy she only sort of knows. Girlie was ballsy. On the other hand, when is a good time to expose all your freaknasty tendencies? Immediately so the person knows what they're getting into or down the line when they care enough to actually consider some of it?
I definitely recall an ex wanting to get a few things on film. We had been together a long while before he brought it up and my answer was still a resounding hell to the no. Nothing against it for others but not for me. One, I'm not trying to see it. Two, my luck? It ends up getting uploaded and tagged to my FB page. No. Thank you.
Let's ask the group: BougieLand? How soon is too soon to wave the freak flag? Have you set the boundaries to your freak zone (no need to share specifics)? Is there such a thing as too freaky? Was Girlie over the line or just asking for what she wanted? Do share...