The Lingering Gamekiller: Baggage

We're going to keep it short and sweet today.

My friend Chad got divorced last year and ever since then he has been Mr. Hit~n~Quit. Yet calls me to tell me there are no "suitable" women in all of Northern California. Um sir, how would you know when you are only spending enough time to learn name and bra size?

He says he not ready to give his "whole heart" to anybody yet. (To which I say okay, but maybe some part of you above the waist?) Moving on...

My last relationship (though hella-trifling) really taught me something - the only things you need to drag forward from your previous relationships are constructive lessons learned. Nothing else. It's best to cut as many of those strings as possible.

Emotional baggage - everyone over the age of 18 has it. It's heavy, it's depressing and it slows you down. Unless you learn how to discard it and let go, the further you get from 18 - the more you have. It just stacks up one on top the other until it all topples down... generally on your head. 

I found this out during my adventures with Dude Formerly Known as New. I kept giving him side-eyes meant for the one before him. Of course, it later turned out that Dude was capable of earning side-eyes all on his own. But that's not the point.

The point is dragging issues, hurts, bad memories and misdeeds from one relationship to the next is a gamekiller. Relax, relate, and release people... It's hard because so many times you don't get closure and memories are a b*tch.

I was talking about this on Twitter the other day. There are some songs it is hard to listen to just because of the sense memory attached. *exhales, shakes it off *

BougieLand, who has trouble letting go of the past? Who has recommnedations for the best way to just move on? How irritating is it to have your new S.O. judge you by what the old one did? I'm interested to hear thoughts and experiences on this one. The floor is yours...