Double Standard? The Unambitious* Under/Unemployed Man

*Note: The keyword is unambitious before y'all start quoting unemployment rates to me.

I don't know, the women may have an advantage in today's double standard. Let's just go straight no chaser - is a woman sitting on her hindparts waiting for someone to pay the bills cut more slack than a fella doing the same thing?

Face facts - a man who doesn't bring home the bacon is often considered less than a man. Unfortunate but true. And I don't mean a man who isn't bringing home platinum-coated bacon. I'm talking a man not even covering basics. Very few folks have sympathy if he doesn't appear to be trying to better himself and his circumstances. 

On the flip, a broke woman is presumed to be between people (daddy, significant other, husband) who'll give her some bacon when she bats her eyelashes. [Disclaimer: BnB does not condone the batting of eyelashes, shaking of booty, or jiggling of ta-tas to make the rent. We believe in everybody getting a J-O-B. Trickin' for treats is NOT the bizness. Thank you, The Management] This unfair assumption is also generally wrong. 

Which also leads to the question - are we less tolerant of the gold-digger looking for a sugar daddy or the gigolo looking for a sugar-mama? Is a female on the come up almost expected while a man applying for the Negro Improvement Plan is ridiculed?

I had an ex-SO who was between gigs (but by no means without fundage) come stay with me in Los Angeles for a few days. The first day I got up to go to work and he was still laying in the bed... we made a joke about it. Me being the breadwinner for a day. Ha ha! The second day I gave him the side-eye. The third day I inquired into how he was planning to spend his day. Even though our finances were not intermingled and he never needed a dime from me - the thought that I was getting up and going out to earn paper while he caught up on beauty sleep chafed my nerves. I'm sorry. I'm old-fashioned. To his credit, he knew this. When I got home that third day, the apartment was clean and dinner was served. Sho you right. A minor example but you take my point. 

I'm just wondering how hard this is in these brutal economic times. What must it be like for a man not to "pull his own weight" and KNOW that folks are cutting him the side-eye? (For that matter, these economic times aren't sitting so well with the sisters either but that's not my point today.) What's it like for men who have chosen to be the stay-at-home caretaker while their wife works? Takes a helluva man to be Mr. Mom. So let me discount the fellas who are really out there hustlin' trying to do the right thing for their families and just focus on the Pookies and the Rico Suaves on the come up.

I guess I'm asking - are we more tolerant of Peaches than Pookie? Is Diamond trying to snag a baller more universally "accepted" than Round-the-way-Rakim rolling up on female executives? Is a broke but cute woman better off than a broke but cute man? I had a guy tell me that a woman in a busted apartment with a bus pass was still getting play as long as she was cute enough - can we say the same for the fellas? Color me curious... the floor is yours, BougieLand.