WBFDD - Why R U Nekkid?

In this installment of What Bougie Folks Don't Do (WBFDD), an open letter to any celebrity.

Dear Celebrity:

I don't care why you are famous. Chances are you work in cinema, television, music, or are just rich and considered one of the beautiful people. The fact that you are used to working in front of the camera is no excuse to carry that over into your personal life. Let's pause for a minute and reflect on that phrase… personal life. That means the life you lead behind closed doors that is nobody's business but your own and your special friends and family.

Here's what's up… I don't know you. I am not your friend or family member. Chances are, I don't want to be your friend or family member. Who knows, you may be nice as all get out. Nevertheless, I don't wanna see you nekkid. I really don't. I understand that I am in the minority on this but hear me out.

You know what's sexy? Mystery. Yep, let it soak in while I repeat it: mystery. Let my imagine run wild and free. We're told that the brain is the sexiest organ in the human body; let that work for you for half a minute. Let someone think about what you have to offer, rather than showing it. There's no mystery in your naughty bits plastered all up and through the Internets. Worse yet is your "oh-ah-right-there-baby" sex tape. That's not the hotness when it's shared with everybody who has access to high speed.

Now I'm not going to get into the debate on whether you should be making these tapes, snapshots, whatever in the first place. Here's an expert with her take on the phenomenon:

Sex and relationship expert Yvonne K. Fulbright, PhD, MS Ed., ACSE, [says]: "A number of stars feel invincible, and many of them also don't foresee that a hacker or soon-to-be-ex they're dating might exploit them later."

While it's not always clear why or how celebrity sex photos and videos become viral, Pamela C. Regan, PhD, professor of psychology at California State University says there are definite ways that celebrities should handle the onslaught of public attention. The first thing to do? Don't deny that you took photos or made a sex tape if in fact you did: "Honesty really is the best policy because the proof is out there, and people have seen it," says Regan. "That doesn't mean you have to talk about it or go into salacious detail. Just admit that it happened and emphasize that it was a private moment."

Fulbright also says it's not necessary to apologize for your behavior: "There's nothing wrong with the naked form and using it to turn on your lover. Sex photos and videos taken with your cell phone are the latest way to reach out and touch someone." At the same time, though, Fulbright emphasizes the importance of feeling comfortable and trusting in your relationship. "Exes can be cruel when things don't work out, and that's whether you were with them for 11 weeks or 11 years. You need to weigh the pros and cons and decide if the risks are really worth the immediate titillation factor. You can also opt for less-risky turn-ons such as practicing more aural sex. There's something to be said for the suggestive versus in-your-face images."

Now I don't agree that sending a naked picture/video is the new Hallmark card. I also think if you and your chosen partner are playing slap-n-tickle with the camera rolling, someone needs to set some ground rules up front and someone needs to be in charge of destroying said media after. And by someone, I mean you.

Whether you are snapping bare-ass pictures of yourself in the hotel bathroom (Jamie Foxx), getting freaky for a significant other (Rihanna), or who knows why (Vanessa Hudgens) it's all just folks I didn't ask to see naked sprawled across Google. Whether you are Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton or Pamela Anderson it's still just people who are porn stars getting their XXX on. Either way, if I didn't send you a note specifically requesting your nakedness (Denzel, did you get my tweet?!) then please, I beg of you… keep it to yourself.

Sincerely yours,


P.S. Yo' mama must be so proud, "Look Ma! I'm naked on YouTube!"

What do you think of the recent rash of naked pictures/film of celebs? Is it okay if they look good in the picture? Thoughts please.