Tuesday, December 06, 2011

Could you be... Gloria Cain?


In the wake of Herman Cain's heauxnanigans, several people on the Twitter began speculating on his wife's state of mind and future plans. This past Saturday, as Gloria Cain stood doing her best Season One Alicia Florrick (if you don't watch The Good Wife, you really really should) imitation - I felt a little queasy. As Herman announced that he was "at peace with his wife" and she was at peace with him, she smiled and clapped like he'd just delivered the MLK "I Have a Dream" speech.

What, I wondered, could possibly motivate a woman to stand up and clap for a man who at the very least has a wandering eye but most probably is a blatant philanderer and grabber of random asses. The minute I asked the question, my timeline flooded with two flavors of responses. Either she was a good Christian woman and was standing by her man to keep the covenant or she had worked out her own economic recovery plan. In short, Gloria was getting paid.

Gloria has been married to dude for 43 years. Georgia is an "equitable distribution" state. I'm not an attorney but I believe that means she gets paid whether she stays or goes. 

There are a lot of things I joke about doing for money. And when push came to shove with millions of dollars at stake, I think I'd pause and consider the "what would you do" question. But this right here? Standing up at a nationally televised event with a man who has completely humiliated me? Could not do it.

I remember years ago, I was in a hair salon with Deion Sanders' first wife. She said she could not take all the extracurriculars and was going to bail. Now most of us in there were young and single and involved with some flavor of professional athlete. Half of the room told her to get a good attorney and bounce, the other half of the room said to give him a chance to turn the corner but stay. His earning potential in the long run was worth a little suffering now. I was stunned. I'd never heard marriage broken down like an income and expense sheet before or since. That "what happens on the road, stays on the road" nonsense did not fly with me. (Hence the failure of that relationship.) I just remember her saying, "I've run out of cheeks and blind eyes to turn." There it is.

We don't know Gloria Cain. She seems to be a real class act, old Southern bouge if you will. We definitely don't know Gloria's motivation. Maybe she really loves that idiot man, maybe she doesn't believe in divorce, maybe she believes these women are all just out to get him... I don't know. I do know that I couldn't do it. Not for all the money in the world.

Bougie Brothers and Sisters. I think we've asked before if you would stay with a cheating spouse. But would you stay with a cheating spouse for a multi-million dollar payout? Why do you think Gloria stayed? Do you think she'll leave eventually? And what do you think of the "Hillary stayed, Gloria should too" argument? Please discuss...

74 comments:

maureen said...

No, I will not stay for a multi-million dollar payout. I will take what is due to me and the  kids at the divorce court and bounce. Life is too short  for this bullshiggity.

It's to early to  call Gloria  decision. She will probably  let the headline simmer down and then make her move. For Hilary, I always  thought it was more of  a strategic  move on her part or  as my then roomate said, "women have survived cheating marriages, she will be ok."

Sasha Iman said...

Que?

Gloria no here, mami. Gloria no here.

You wrong number.

thinklikeRiley said...

Sidebar - Do female politicians not cheat? Or do they just not get caught?

Leon X said...

I won't speculate on anyone should operate in a marriage. However, I will say this. During Gloria Cain's era a number of female R&B singers sang about how their man could see other women just don't let them know about it. I'll leave it at that.

Lady4Real said...

Ok so Saturday myself, my stepmom and my bestie are sitting in my besties hair salon. Bestie is in a 8 year long dysfunctional relationship and can't get dude to get gone. He is obessed with knowing her every waking move. We think he does so because he has dirt and is transposing it onto her. We asked her, "Do you think he is cheating?" She responded, "I wish he was, get him the hell away from me and off my nerves." This sparked the "all men cheat" convo. I do not agree with this philosophy but I'm 28 and optimistic so I could be wrong. My stepmom has been around the block and subscribes to this philosphy and leaves wiggle room for my Dad should he ever decide to wander but he would have to pay up later; money, groveling, gifts and such. She asked me what is my policy and I asked her to notice where here EX-son in law now is, I don't play with infidelity, you cheat on me I'm out, to hell with a payday, beliefs, or whatever. I.JUST.CAN'T. Either I'm all you want or I'm not what you want, I don't play 2nd fiddle to a damn thing and I can't be bought, my ancestors fought and died to ensure that I would never be bought and sold ever a damn 'gin so miss me with that. Now I will say this, a few years ago I was a devout Christian, damn near cult like and I believed in following the good book to the letter including forgiving and staying married until death do us part but even the good book says you can leave if someone cheats and that's exactly what I did so Gloria can go and Jesus will still love her but 40+ years in the game brings in factors that I can't even begin to fathom.

JaymeC said...

I have to wonder how much of it is the fact that she's been with him for 4o+ years. She knows what she's got. Maybe she's just like "Le Bougie Shrug" - whatever.

Bless her heart. I couldn't do it but if Glo is happy, good for her.

faithandgrace1 said...

43 years you say?  The way he's been throwin it around I'm sure she had some idea what was goin' on before he got outted on national television.  If she stuck around that long, why leave now?  She obviously must be past what other people think.  Or maybe she would consider it more humiliating to admit to the world that she knowingly put up with his stuff for the length of time that she did. 
I myself could not and would not.  Not for nuffin.  And I am Christian and could use a couple mil.  But then again if I was her I probably would have left long before the 43 year mark.... On a side note, what does the way Hilary handled her personal affairs have to do with the way Gloria should handle her personal affairs?  They're both grown women.  Are people really saying this? o_O

Mykeia said...

I couldn't do it on this level.  He let her get embarrassed--nationally.  Your partner is supposed to have your back at all times right?   When you are putting yourself in the public eye you need to know about all of your partners "what if this came to light" past situations.   I don't know all of the story maybe her and Gloria were old friends/lovers/co-workers etc. who knows?  Maybe Gloria has a side-piece somewhere that no one knows about...
After all of this, we would be living in separate houses and he would be footing the bill for everything until I could re-group and refocus...Christmas is going to be awkward this year at their house. 

@BecomingAMW Angel Blanca said...

How long would I have to stay for such a pay-out? Seriously, though, I don't think I can answer this without being in the situation, because it would be the actual feelings I had for dude that would determine if I would be willing to stay.

I've heard accounts that Gloria and Hermie lived largely separate lives anyway, so such a life could be managed if one's sense of identity is tied to the patina of long-term marriage, with or without any monetary expectation. However, the public exposure threatened to upend whatever arrangements they may have had. I think it's related, in some ways, to generational differences we may not understand, as they've been married nearly as long as I've been alive. My aunt and uncle are rarely together in the same residence for more that a week at a time, and it's been that way for years. I think it's the projected image that

Lady4Real said...

Good sidebar Riley, good indeed.

Jubi The Great said...

If I was going to stay just for a payout, I would have been gone a long time ago. But for me, there's no amount of money that is worth my dignity & self-respect, and for that reason, there's no way I could have been in Gloria's shoes. I'm sure after 43 years of marriage, the prospect of being on her own is daunting & debilitating.

DCbywayofCali said...

It could just be that she doesn't want to be divorced at her age.  Sometimes folks don't even care about the cocoa they just don't want to be alone or have to start all over again at what 60+?

As for me, I doubt I'd be standing up there like Silda, Dina, or Gloria. I'd like to think I'd be MIA like Jenny Sanford, but you just never know.

ASmith said...

Agh!  I won't sit up here and definitively say that I would never be Gloria Cain.  43 years is a really, really, really long time and you can't tell me she doesn't at least partially, if not fully, define herself in part by her marriage.  Not many people have the mental dexterity or emotional ability to leave  behind something that has defined them for so long.  I'd like to think I do, but ask me again after I've been married that long.

Stay with someone for money?  Hmm... I don't know.  I hate fake.  If we've gotten to the point where my husband is so sure I'm going to leave he's willing to pay me to stay, I must be preeeeeeettty ready to go and if there's one thing I've learned about me, it's not to do what my spirit is really telling me not to (or to do what it's telling me to) because in the long run, if I ignore that, I'll be mad at myself...

Multi-million tho?  Lawdamercy... ask me this after I get a handle on these student loans, k?

ASmith said...

I have to agree with you on that embarrassment point.  She's supposed to stay to help him keep up appearances after he's made her look like boo boo the fool?  Nawl...

Michele said...

After 43 years of marriage I can't say what I would do.  I've left marriages for less.  Yes, that was plural.  But I know people that have stayed under the same circumstances.  It's hard to speculate.  I feel bad for Gloria but I'd be willing to bet there are more wives enduring this kind of treatment than women who cut and run.  I have a close friend who is married to someone who is turning into a serial cheater.  She won't leave and he knows it.  After 20+ years of marriage she says she doesn't know how to be alone.  She's afraid to start over.  **shrugs**.  I don't know.  It couldn't be me. 

Michele said...

Jenny Sanford is my hero.

ASmith said...

This deserves it's own post, I think.

One the one hand, women do cheat, studies suggest that we just don't get caught.

However, I think in the world of politics, women know we have so much more to lose and so we don't go there.  Plus, women are also taught as girls that sex is not for them to go gallivanting around doing.  We're taught that to think every man we meet might become our next bed buddy is to be a hoe and hoes, we're taught, do not prosper.  We forgive men doing this, we would never forgive a woman for doing this.

So I say societal norms prevent women who want to ascend the ranks in any field, but politics especially, from losing what they work for because they couldn't keep their pants buttoned.

Michele said...

They don't get caught. 

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

I feel sorry for Gloria Cain only in regards to her husband's foolishness being on display for the entire world to see.  Other than that? AHNT! They have been married 43 years.  After that much time, you know your spouse. I highly doubt that Uncle Herm would have been bothered to hide just how much of a tool he is for that length of time.  She may be shocked by the depth of his shiggity, but not that there is shiggity there.

I don't know what motivated her to be on that stage, but she is the only one that has to be at peace with her decision.  As for me, that level of humiliation is so egregious that I don't know how I would be able to get over it.  Especially because, if the tables were turned, he would not be so forgiving.

As for your original question, I don't think I could stick out a flagrant cheater for a multi-million dollar payout.  After a while, the transgressions pile up, and no amount of money will make up for the hurt, betrayal, disrespect, and pain.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Women who go into politics know what they have to lose, and that the public will not be forgiving, so they are less likely to cheat.  On the rare occasion that they do cheat, they take more measures to not get caught.

CaliGirlED said...

Barbara this is Shirley...

CaliGirlED said...

Either I'm all you want or I'm not what you want"...AGREED

"I don't play 2nd
fiddle to a damn thing and I can't be bought, my ancestors fought and
died to ensure that I would never be bought and sold ever a damn 'gin so
miss me with that."...*hi-five*

kh20s said...

LMBAO!!!!!

CaliGirlED said...

YES to your whole comment!!! Easy to say when those moccasins aren't laced up around your feet!

blackprofessor said...

I say both! I think they either 1) don't cheat or 2) they cheat with men who have just as much to lose so no one finds out.

blackprofessor said...

Hot mess! Now I got that song in my head, lol!!

CaliGirlED said...

I'd like to say that I wouldn't (pretty damn sure I wouldn't). I would
like to think though that I wouldn't have gotten to 43 years with that
type of behavior, which I'm sure didn't just come to light in these
recent months. But women from Mrs. Cain's generation are programmed to stay, as Leon said in his comment. I've seen this time and time again (and again), and I just don't understand it!

Like ASmith said below I don't know what I would do after 40+ years of marriage, but I am pretty sure that I wouldn't let my marriage get to that point, IF I knew what he was doing. Now 40+ years and all of a sudden...well there might be some counseling that I would be willing to sit through.

As for staying for the money? Shiiiiid, you're going to pay me either way!!! Either way!(in my Katt Williams' voice)...Speaking of Katt, ok let's not!

MsJamie14 said...

In reading these stories, there are so many women that stay there has to be something to it... the comfortable lifestyle? The commitment to the wedding vows? The fear of starting over? Looking at years of happiness vs. the moments of betrayal? I don't know.

However, I DO know that once you get blatent and sloppy with your indescretions, I'M OUT! Perhaps there is an "understanding" betwen these spouses... I mean, if you marry someone like a pro athlete the chances of 100% fidelity are pretty low, so I guess you pick your poison going in.

But no way in hell you'll be messing around, get shamed in public (therefore shaming me!) and catch me skinnin and grinin by your side when you "confess" for the world to see. Uh UH! Money is no replacement for my piece of mind. Buh Bye!

Lady4Real said...

*hi-five* right back

Leo the Yardie Chick said...

I don't know Mrs. Cain's motivations, values, or thoughts on the matter. Personally, I think she should cut and run, but I'm not her. Hillary isn't her either, so I can't co-sign on the 'she should stay, too' argument. Mrs. Cain can only do what she feels is best for her, whether we agree or not.

As for me? I. would. be. OUT! I've seen too many women in my family stand by their philandering testicle-bearers for reasons I cannot comprehend, and probably never will. It doesn't matter if he has millions of dollars to his name, either. Peace of mind, and being STD/STI-free, is priceless.

TrulyPC said...

LOL!

blackprofessor said...

I have never been in this situation but I would hope that in this era of the rising 3Hs (HIV, Herpes, HPV) I would bounce on a philanderer.  I can't see getting to 43 years with a man who constantly steps out.  One time cheating? I could probably be coaxed to do counseling after I calmed down.

I think Gloria is doing what Bishop Long's wife did - putting up a good front while the cameras are rolling but might file for divorce in the future.  Bishop Long's wife received the same criticism when those allegations came out but she allegedly filed for divorce over the weekend. 

I think Elin Woods handled her situation perfectly.   She didn't try to promote a good wife image.  She didn't pretend like she was staying in the marriage. She let Tiger deal with the situation alone, stayed out of sight, divorced him and moved on with her life.   Her actions conveyed no pretenses and that she was going to do what was best for her and her kids.

BklynBajan said...

I think it IS a generational thing and at this point she can't see herself out here on her own...once again..one more time BY herself...

I think I'm past the point of marriage solely for love so this is where business sense has to kick in. Yes I luvvedded you with all my heart but if you didn't know before you took them vows with me you will know me when you check the account and its empty. I'll already be at the beach with Tyrone, Dexter and Denzel while you fuss around with the press (afterwhich my lawyer (ala cuzzin Tyrone) will enforce that prenup you probably didn't read regarding the don't eff with me clause).

I don't think Hillary Clinton is a fair example to use with Cain. Hillary Clinton had and continues to have her own life/aspirations outside of her marriage & in this world divorcing POTUS (in or out of office) would have hurt her more than sticking it out. The media would have put so much focus on that she would not have been able to run for office or even have the Sec of State position. Herman Cain is nowhere on that level and given the level of BS going on Mrs. Cain should have been left. She is of a different generation however so I have sympathy for her and hope she is able to find peace in whatever form she can deal with.

TrulyPC said...

No amount of money is worth it.  I love trust and if it isn't in the mix then neither am I.  Unfortunately many people are raised to believe that it is normal and
expected for men to step outside the relationship.  May I never
have another relationship if this is my expected plight.


"Either she was a good Christian woman and was standing by her man to keep the covenant..." 

I have an extremely hard time understanding this reason for staying in a faulty relationship because I am wondering if the woman is the ONLY one that is expected to be concerned with the covenant???

rozb said...

Female politicians cheat; but - they are more likely to go long-term and think more about liaisons, rather than some tap it fast and run-type stuff. Those quickie groupie, skripper/escort, or intern types can't keep their mouth shut and are looking for a fast payout with maximum impact. These women will collect videos, text messages, and DNA, and the men are none the wiser.

Female politicians are also probably less likely to mess around outside and down from their station. They ain't messing with men who need rent, bills paid, babies fed, etc.

If you notice, the politicians who are the most vocal about others cheating are the menfolk. The female politicians tsk tsk and stuff, but they let the men go on and implode, including those who are hollering holier than thou.

The_A said...

No. No, I could not be Gloria Cain.

and it is not about standing by his corny [behind] during that press conference, it's about what I would have had to endure and ignore for the 43 years preceding the press conference.

Bougieland, c'mon 43 years?!

Do you know how many lifetimes of happiness she could have been living in 43 years? This is not I'm sorry, I love you. Please forgive me. Can we work it out? I'ma do betta.

Nope not even if he had Warren Buffet sized stacks.

Leo the Yardie Chick said...

"..because I am wondering if the woman is the ONLY one that is expected to be concerned with the covenant???"

You and me both.

GuessImJay said...

Or is it that men that sleep with married women don't out them?

rozb said...

Yup.

Nikki said...

Ew. I am absolutely repulsed by germs. I wouldn't be able to stand by him without a mask and a can of Lysol. I would have to spray and wipe up after his every move and that's just too much work.

 And, I just can't wait to see which man stands by his cheating public figure wife bc he's a good Christian lol!

Leo the Yardie Chick said...

"And, I just can't wait to see which man stands by his cheating public figure wife bc he's a good Christian lol!"

That would be one helluva sight.

Pure Choco said...

I could try and get past a random ass grab at a convention but the 13 year affair? And he answered old girl's call on the air the other day like "What's up?" No. Couldn't do it.

Sol_dier said...

What about another option?.
For some people marriage isn't about love or affection. It's about safe procreation and security.

It's possible that the Cain's have a pretty cool & agreeable marriage, which excludes sex and allows for his extra marital affairs.

Or maybe, being married so long has made them more friends and confidants than husband & wife. 
It is possible, that they have discussed it and have given each other permission to seek outside sources for physical satisfaction whilst keeping a good home for themselves and the children 

CaliGirlED said...

Sow-wy! ;-)

Beverly said...

I was thinking the same thing. She may very well know of most of his indiscretions and does not care. She probably has a full life outside of him. Who knows, she may have her own Thurston who has been breaking her back for the past 25 years or so. Her so called humiliation could very well be an understanding.

I know quite a number of older couples like this. A friend's parents have been separated for over 20 years but they still show up for family and public functions with coordinated outfits and everything.These people are academics, it is all so civilized and weird at the same time.

CaliGirlED said...

"I am most likely the one who would try to drown his azz in the backyard pool and say he had a heart attack."...Yep, this is why we click! Consequences and repercussions, is all I'm saying. AND I'm still getting paid! Eitha whay!

CaliGirlED said...

"I could probably be coaxed to do counseling after I calmed down." Yeah, way after!

nylse said...

That's not marriage! if that's the case its good that all of this is coming to light because they've been deceiving themselves and others.

nylse said...

what an insult to christianity - christians aren't fools nor are they supposed to be.  it's being selective about your christianity and then acting pious and self righteous.
and the other thing is all men dont cheat - real men are insulted by the notion that they have to cheat.

CaliGirlED said...

"I'll already be at the beach with Tyrone, Dexter and Denzel while you
fuss around with the press (afterwhich my lawyer (ala cuzzin Tyrone)
will enforce that prenup you probably didn't read regarding the don't
eff with me clause)."...*hollers*

CaliGirlED said...

Yeah you're right, maybe they have a deal.

I'll take Door #3 Monty Hall...and be out!

Sasha Iman said...

As was temporarily stated in my comment from above, I'd bounce not because he cheated, but because his hoenannigans was messier than a sloppy joe made with mystery meat that the dog slobbered on.

No. Thank. You.

Even if we had an arrangement (therefor he didn't cheat), I know how the world operates. I'm not about to be looking all flavors of foolish because the hubster doesn't know how to act right. There will be no giving of inches, to people who take miles.

Rhenewal said...

To each their own and all that. 

We all say what we would and would not stand for, but 43 years go marriage is damn near inconceivable to me. That's time and energy and effort and work, put in over a ridiculously long expanse of time. You don't just give that up. At that point in time, your lives are either inextricably intertwined, or you're living parallel to each other. I don't think leaving is a feasible option at that point.

Finding out your man is/has been cheating after two years is not easy. And some women stay to work it out. Finding out after five years is hard. And women stay. Finding out after 10 years is probably devastating. And women stay. FORTY-THREE YEARS is life-altering! 

[This is aside from the whole notion that a woman usually knows when her man is cheating, and if she put up with it for this long, she'd be a little foolish to be angry NOW. ]

All that said, I hope I'd have figured out what was going on earlier (within the five-year period where it's difficult but not yet devastating) and made my way on out.

Sol_dier said...

Nope. They are not deceiving themselves. They have a grown and adult understanding and have worked a definition of marriage for them. not for you, but for them.

Many relationships end because the couple decide they have become more like brother and sister. They care immensely about each other they are just no longer physically attracted to one another.

Some people can separate physical attraction from emotional needs. 
You might not agree with it, but you don't have to, if it works for them

Sol_dier said...

I'm not trying to convince anyone to stay, I just pondered maybe they had an arrangement.

If they did, It seems that he was discreet at least initially? (I might not be getting the details over here) anyway.

Another possibility is that she could be bidding her time. Trying to make sure she discovers where all the assets are e.t.c. what future income generation he has and how they might restructure the renumeration which she might receive. 

An Example: Bishop Long's wife waited and is now divorcing him. 
Mayhaps, these ladies are smarter than we think.

Sol_dier said...

I know a couple who split up and the ex wife sometimes baby sits for him and his new wife. 
They have a brother/sister relationship. 
He is always around to help her, pick her up drop her off, they made an extended family out of the situation.

She told me that she couldn't see herself settling down again. She prefers having short intense love affairs. 
(they are also academics lol)

nylse said...

i still say its not marriage...if they're not deceiving themselves they definitely chose to deceive others - after all if it's not a marriage anymore, then no one would be asking these questions of mrs. cain.

Dr. Reginia said...

I couldn't do it. 

Gloria ate a bit of crow. In one interview she went on and on about how she  wouldn't be there and lookie lookie, she's right there. Gloria is from the generation where women were condition to stay, stand, and support. Secondly, Herman has a good income so she probably doesn't want to leave the lifestyle.

HOWEVER

In this day, I'd consider my health and mental wellness. In 13 years, he and ole Ginger too were not protected sexually. So now, Gloria's "slept" with Ginger and whatever ratchetness she chose to entertain.

Quality of life is important and I don't know how any woman could have a peaceful existence with a man who obviously has no respect for our union. 43 years means nothing if he's cheated most of them.

www.herperfectblackdress.com

bklynbajan said...

*fist bump* You gotta know your limits man and this here isn't one of them!

Sol_dier said...

not your decision to make. 
a marriage can involve more than 2 people.

GammasWorld said...

I'd like to say I would be a big "hell no I couldn't be Glo" but having found myself in that situation, I will tell you it was actually a hard decision for me to make and we weren't even married.  He was a huge part of my life and my daughter's life for over 10 years so I can't even imagine what conclusions a 43-year marriage would drive me towards.  I actually gave some serious thought to could we, should we but I just couldn't.  

nylse said...

i never said it was; i was stating my opinion, just like you are stating yours.  

C Nelson said...

It depends. If I really didn't know and he was dishonest with me? He can dangle on that stage out there by his lonesome; I and my divorce attorney will get back to him. If I knew upfront and this was how our marriage was? I can see why we wouldn't be outing ourselves as poly in the middle of his campaign; it'd be easier to channel Alicia and keep going, knowing that we understand if no-one else does. I can't imagine why the third side of a stable-for-more-than-a-decade trio would rock the boat that way at this point, so I doubt that's how it was... but hey, you asked what I would do.

C Nelson said...

*shudder.* My brother's name is Dexter; I'm gonna need folks around here to refrain from using that name in lists like this one.  ;)

Brenda Kay said...

Could I be Gloria Cain? No. And here are the reasons why ~ I wasn't born in the 1940's and raised in an era where Black women knew that any sort of career path that they chose would have limitations set on how much they would be able to achieve. Additionally, I didn't grow up on a steady mental diet where I continually heard that, "Men are the breadwinners and the G-D ordained heads of their family". My mom and the other adult women in my life weren't talking to me in whispered tones about how men have "needs" that will cause them to stray, but if I'm a good wife, a good mother and I keep a clean home, my husband will always come home to me. I also haven't been married the whole of my adult life to a man whom I wed upon graduating from college. But Gloria Cain has...

In my opinion, the only comparison to be made between Gloria Cain and Vanessa Long are, both of these women married extremely narcissistic men who give new meaning to the term "self-absorbed". Given Gloria's age, the time period in which she grew up, her demeanor in the few television appearances that she's made - I really don't see this woman leaving her marriage until death take either her or Herman first. 

Sol_dier said...

erm, you do realise that you are the one who responded the comment I made, right?.

as you were.

Sol_dier said...

but do you see her possibly adding a little extra something to Hermans meals?.. to ease the passing? lol

CaliGirlED said...

If I were Gloria Cain... there but for the findings of CSI!!!

Evansaw said...

I personally would have left after the first contestant showed up.  But Mrs. Cain is from the generation "Turn a blind eye, and spend as much money as you can".  I am  sure "Hermy Baby" (as we are calling him around the water cooler here)  has purchased some serious bling for her in the past to compensate for the roving eye, and you can bet the lady knows this man inside and out.  You don't live with a man for 40 years or more without knowing what he is going to do before he does it. Mrs. Cain is very much at peace with Mr. Cain right now;  and you can bet that peace is going to cost him plenty. Don't count her out, she may leave his rusty butt yet!

Evansaw said...

She knew exactly what was going on;  the older generation believes in "death do you part", especially when there is money involved.  Marriage is more than a romantic relationship, and 40 years brings a lot of baggage;  it is not always that easy to walk away.

Evansaw said...

I am sure she enjoys the security of being the wife of a wealthy and connected man.  What the younger generation may not understand is that there is not a lot of opportunity for a possibly over 60 woman who has devoted the most productive  part of her life to raising this man's children, and giving him  a comfortable home to come to for all those years.  Who wants to start over at that age? Besides, a lot of older couples live together  very comfortably "after the love is gone".  They just don't embarrass and humiliate their spouses in this manner.  The way she has been smiling through all this makes me believe that girlfriend has a little agenda of her own....

Mina B. said...

I'd have chunked him the deuces long ago. I don't understand the good Christian woman argument either. The bible gives you an out! Folks from back in the day would stick it out for worse & abysmal b/c things were different (opportunities for women, social expectations etc).  2011 is a different ball game and I can't accept that she'd stick around and be miserable for the sake of staying together! Politicians are expected to have a family and my guess is that this has to be working for both of them....but I'd sure like to know what the hizzle she is getting out of it myself.

JJ said...

Call me overly optimistic, but I do believe people can change, including cheating spouses. But there's a caveat. In the words of Dr. Phil, "you can't change what you don't acknowledge". If someone does you wrong and wants to make amends, they have to:

1. Acknowledge that what they did was wrong. This means they need to be completely honest about their actons.
2. Make a pledge and actively demonstrate that they are denouncing the behavior and not going to do it again.

Cain gets an big FAIL on point #1 because he's still denying that there was hanky panky between he and Ginger White. If he isn't able to be completely honest about his actions and acknowledge that they were wrong, than how can he change his behavior?  Thus, he also gets a big FAIL on point # 2 because if a person doesn't belive they did something wrong, they will most likely repeat the behavior.

Now, behind closed doors Cain may be telling his wife the nitty gritty truth and that may be good enough for her. However, if I were in that situation, it wouldn't be good enough to me. If my husband humiliated me in front of the entire COUNTRY,  he would have to do a  Coby Bryant and let the whole the country see him admit that he was an absolute donkey for stepping out on me and see him publicly beg for my forgiveness.

rozb said...

Gloria is playing her position. She may look like your auntie or granny that always carries mints and tissues in her purse, but you betta believe Herman is going to pay for this shibacle he has foisted upon the public and her family. Her personal portfolio is thicker, her family is most likely on her side, and she does not care as long as he is out of the race.

I don't have the fortitude. I am most likely the one who would try to drown his azz in the backyard pool and say he had a heart attack.

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails