Friday, October 28, 2011

It's not that I'm always right... I'm just rarely wrong


The conversation:
"Michele, I've been singing this song for years. It's 'love is for me to find, how much I adore you.'"
"That doesn't even make sense. The words are 'love is too weak to define how much I adore you.'"
"Between the two of us, who knows more Prince lyrics?"
"Um, me?"
"No. I've been a Princeologist for years."
"Uh-huh. I'm seven years older than you, David. Do the math."
"There you go with the older thing."
"What older thing?"
"You think because you're older, you know more than me."
"I absolutely do not think that."
"Well, why do you think you're always right?"
I paused. Not wanting to say, "Because I usually am?!" What I said instead was, "Do you seriously think I always think I'm right?"
"I plead the fifth."
"That's an answer."
"That's a non-answer."
"By refusing to answer, you answered the question."
"And you know this because you're always right?"
"Really?"
"Let's not make it a thing. I love it that you're smart and confident. I love that you're usually the smartest person in the room."
"Now that's not true."
"Take a compliment. I'm just saying. Yes, you are right often. But sometimes, I'm right. And not just when I agree with you. Deal with it."
Thankfully we were on the phone and he couldn't see me rolling my eyes. "Acknowledged. You are right. Next topic?"
Silence but I hear him typing in the background. "Oh."
"Oh?"
"You might be right about the Prince lyrics."
"Hmm."
"Don't be smug."
"Me? Never."
"I should have known not to challenge you on anything remotely related to purple. Whatever. It's still a great song."
"One of the best."
"So we're good?"
"We're great."
David would not be the first (or the last) to tell me I have "I'm right and you're wrong"-itis. My bad. I've just always been the person who knows random stuff. Name two Triple Crown winners, a Nat King Cole song from 1952, who played running back for the Denver Broncos in 1998? What gets wine out of silk, what's the best way to prune roses before winter and what keeps avocado from turning brown? This is the kind of random nonsense my brain is filled with. I'm your girl for Trivial Pursuit.

To my credit, if I don't know something - I'm the first one to throw up my hands and say I'm clueless. And when I'm wrong, I will own up to it. (But that doesn't happen very often - okay, more often than I'd like). Is there a 12-step program for Hate-to-be-wrongitis?

Who's with me? Who "strongly dislikes" being wrong? Who is full of random information that has no substantive value unless we host a Bougie Jeopardy night? Is there a support group we can go to? Thoughts on the wrongness of always being right?

76 comments:

Angela said...

I hate to be wrong!  I don't speak unless I know I'm right. lol

Anonymous said...

"love is too weak to define just what you mean to me"....you're both wrong HA!
chivalrous.won@hotmail.com

Anonymous said...

"if god one day struck me blind
your beauty I'd still see
loooooove's too weak to define
just what you mean to me"
chivalrous.won@hotmail.com
;-)

Lady Ngo said...

I can't stand being wrong which is why i generally don't say anything unless i know i'm right. The only thing i hate more than being wrong is being right and having someone tell me i'm wrong...and refusing to see that i'm right even in the face of evidence. SMH

MsJamie14 said...

LOL @ the convo.

Anyway, who likes being wrong? LOL. But I'll be the first to admit that even though I come across as a "know it all," I'm not jumping into a fight unless I know I can win. Eating crow is never fun. LOL

JustSaying said...

You both are wrong. The lyric is "love's too weak to define, just what you mean to me."

Just saying. 

The Husky Bro said...

you may be wrong, but you may be right.  

I am never wrong and even when I am, there was a reason that I was wrong, to make it right, you know?

What?

AndreaPlaid said...

Ya know, like many traits, "I'm-Right-Itis" has its place, like when you're dealing with people at your job who try to undermine your experience/knowledge for whatever boils-down-to-lack-of-hometraining reason. Having your facts correct is a job-saver...oh, and screencaps, I'm finding out.:-D However, don't be That Person who can't ever, ever be wrong. "I don't know, but let me find out" is also a job-saver.

As for the rest of life...trickier. I know I have that tendency--having a mom who's horribly, unrepentantly so--but I also try to temper it with "I'm not sure/I don't know." For a lack of a better way of saying it, it makes a person seem more human (and more humane) with acknowledging one's limitations. As they say, if we knew everything, we'd be God. And my arms are waaaaaaay too short to box with alla that.

thinklikeRiley said...

You're right and she's right. He says it twice in the song. One your way, one hers.

thinklikeRiley said...

You're right and she's right. He says it twice in the song. One your way, one hers.

thinklikeRiley said...

Riley iz always right. Long as everybody agree. It's cool.

CaliGirlED said...

This really tickled me! First of all you guys were "debating" the words to my favorite Prince song, Adore.

I don't think I have "I'm right, you're wrong itis", because I will easily fall back during a disagreement or debate. But I do hate to be wrong.

BlackButterfly said...

Ha!  Wrong?  What is that?

Okay yes I have been accused of this but I don't ever use my powers for evil.  I am random information person in my circle.  I do a lot of reading and I am a research fanatic on anything that sparks an interest.

Jeannette said...

LOL... Hey Chele this is where you and I are similar.  I know random facts, I just do.  I attribute this to reading encyclopedias as a child.  I was just fascinated by them.  Then Yahoo and Google came around? Man listen.  I love knowing stuff that the average person doesn't even think twice about.   I was even on a game show once.. made it to the finals and lost because I couldn't remember whether the Arctic Circle or Antarctica was closer to Canada.  0_O

CaliGirlED said...

 LOL!!!

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Goodness, you are describing me to a tee. Except, I think my collection of mental facts is a bit more arcane and useless.

I do not think there is something wrong with always being right. But, since I am a card carrying member of this club, I have learned that how you handle your rightness makes a big difference in how you are received.  Sometimes, I've simply either avoided correcting a person or pointing out that I'm right, or I've been more delicate in pointing out when someone needs to modify their perspective.

dasmokingace said...

I hated to be wrong, but my wife always get mad when I defended my answer. I now I just look dumbfounded on randomness.  Like if I tell her something random,  she gives me that look.  After that, I just shut up like I don't know nothing. I can get away with it when I am around guys because we like expanding our knowledge and we will look for reference of validation of the answers.

ClayJones said...

How rare for a woman to think she's always right...
Jokes. Jokes. You at least own up it.
I've learned it's just easier to let the woman think she's right. That sounded more chauvinist than I meant it to.

AndreaPlaid said...

::church-pinches Riley::

DCbywayofCali said...

I hate to be wrong, but am learning to be quiet and listen more often.  Sometimes you can even learn something in the other person's wrongness. Yeah I  made up that word.

Miz JJ said...

I can read quickly and have a partial photographic memory, so weird facts stick. Usually I don't press when I'm right anymore. I just say "ok" or "sure". This drives GoP crazy because he knows I am "giving up" not because I am wrong, but rather because I know I am right and that is all that usually matters to me. Then he is googling figuring out he's wrong talking about "You knew you were right...why did you just say ok?" And I rub him on his head and say "It seemed more important to you than to me. Plus, one day you'll figure out that I am always right...you'll get there babe. I have faith." Heh.

BlackButterfly said...

Ha and Ha again .  Don't genderize (yes I made that up, gender+tenderize) right-itis because I know a lot of men who think that there is no such thing as them being wrong about anything.

rozb said...

When I am right, I am right. When he is right, I just happen to have the alternate solution.

OwenCinDallas said...

I've spent a lot of my married life nodding and saying "You're right honey"

MsJamie14 said...

"I've learned it's just easier to let the woman think she's right."

As a woman, I have no problem with this. LOL

OneChele said...

Jayme is going to place her crocodile slingback squarely in your John Brown hindparts.

NatashaHunter said...

^ yes, yes YES! I will MURDERIZE (lol) someone when they insist I'm wrong when I know I'm right. I backed away from a potential relationship behind that crap...ain't mad about it neither...

Trey Charles said...

No one likes to be wrong and be told they're wrong. Though some of us handle it better than other
*side-eyes Michele AND David*

NatashaHunter said...

That's funny, and being born and bred in Minneapolis I just want to say that Mr. Chase should purify himself in the water of Lake Minnetonka for that one!  Seriously... we don't play dat! :)

*goes back to work humming Starfish and Coffee*

blackprofessor said...

This is too funny! I am so stealing Princeologist, lol!!

I also know a lot of random stuff because I am naturally curious.  I usually preference stuff with "I think" or "In my opinion", seems easier to handle.  

CaliGirlED said...

So which one is closer?

blackprofessor said...

I've learned it's just easier to let the woman think she's right. - I have found this out about men as well, lol!

JaymeC said...

Yes I am. This from a man who  as recently as last night screamed "If you just admit I'm right we could go to sleep!"
*crosses arms and taps foot*

JaymeC said...

No. You. Didn't.
You and your buddy Owen may step over to the bleachers and have all the seats.

Jeannette said...

iono lol

tiffanyinhouston said...

Glad to know I wasn't the only one who read all her encyclopedias as a child!!! I read the whole set A-Z. I'm thankful to my English teacher mama for instilling in me a love of reading and writing, that I still have to this day.

And when it comes to being right, I always am. Period. *hard stare into camera*

maureen said...

Because I don't want to argue or get into a  debate ( to defend whether I'm right or wrong), I usually just say "yes,"  "ok," or "let us not argue about it."

motown_skater said...

i'm an "in my opinion" person too.... :-)

Alvin Milton said...

I'm typically right about things cuz i'm like OD smart but in the off chance that I'm wrong I can fully admit it though or seek an answer. 

There is a bit of power in conceding to the other party when the situation doesn't really affect anything. Saves me from an unnecessary convo about things I could SO care less about. 

Prioritize the spats and get your points in as necessary. The rest can get the deuces.

Does that sound arrogant? W/e I'm quite arrogant on the low.

The Bunni said...

The Arctic Circle.  Don't ask me how I know that. lol

CaliGirlED said...

LOL

CaliGirlED said...

Thanks Bunni!

CaliGirlED said...

 Ruh roh!!!

CaliGirlED said...

You ain't gotta lie Craig!

Only1DivaC said...

Well, my friends do accuse of me knowing random things especially when it comes to words. I believe my Dad. If we couldn't spell something we couldn't ask him how to spell it, we had to get the old school dictionary (the heavy duty one that weighed more than we did at the time), look it up, and then proceed to understand the root origin of the word. We also had to pull out the thesaurus to find the synonyms to the word. Needless to say my friends look at me weird when we travel overseas and I can decipher what a word means without knowing the primary language.

AndreaPlaid said...

OwenCinDallas --see...that was such an SMH move. ::stands out of JaymeC's way::

NatashaHunter said...

"There is a bit of power in conceding to the other party when the situation doesn't really affect anything. Saves me from an unnecessary convo about things I could SO care less about. "

This is what I wanted to say in response to yesterday's "I'm sorry" post.

Alvin Milton said...

Yeah this post and the "I'm sorry" (even though I'm not really) are kind of two sides of a coin... or maybe 1 side of a cube (1/6)) ... so i have a similar methodology for both.

C Nelson said...

"When you're trying hard to be your best, could you be a little less?" 

... As long as you know how to concede graciously when you're wrong, be right as often as you can manage. Anything else makes no darned sense at all.

SingLikeSassy said...

I am full of random factoids! Mostly because I am curious about a lot of stuff and so I'll go find out the origin of it rather than just wonder.

I also have a Law & Order law degree and a House medical degree. LOL!

Mykeia said...

Being wrong, what does that mean?---Kidding!
I don't like to be wrong but I will admit when I don't know something AND I will admit if I was misinformed and then we can all get past it.  
Be well this weekend BnB fam!

SingLikeSassy said...

He would still be up while I was exploring the inside of my eyelids cause that would have been like throwing down the gauntlet to me and now I ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT admit you are right.

SingLikeSassy said...

But can we pause for a minute for an update on the young lady from yesterday's post? I need to know she left or is making moves to leave.

Jeannette said...

Where were you 10 years ago? LOL

keisha brwon said...

jellus!

Jeannette said...

Same here, our family time was playing Scrabble for hours and if we didn't know the word, we had a dictionary nearby.   

Ivory Tabb said...

Whoa I am the queen of right- itis move over Chele let me share some of that throne.  I have always been a know it all, a read an awful lot and I remember everything ( a deadly combination) I rarely debate things that I don't know for sure cause I like to be right lol. I always say just google it and we will see whose right lol!
The biggest thing for me right now is I would love to date a man that loves to debate, I love having friendly debates and bets over simple things. If a man isnt really into all that it really may not work at all.
A debate is not an argument nor is it the end of the world especially if its something simple.
When it comes to serious things my motto is 
Would you rather be right or in a relationship?
Even I know you gotta  know when to pick your battles.

keishabrown said...

if you did.. i was totally there with you!
plus it's fun to make up words!

keishabrown said...

*nods head

JaymeC said...

I went to sleep in the guest room. #stubbornandsleepy

motown_skater said...

i thought about her this morning and lifted her in prayer....

GuessImJay said...

This is along the lines of the "I'm sorry" post, huh?

OneChele said...

I miss WorldBook. Wiki is not the same.

MidWestDominicana said...

Ms. Roz...this just became my status message on gmail. Mwah!

CaliGirlED said...

 I have a Law & Order degree too, and a Law & Order: SVU master's! LOL

CaliGirlED said...

*fist bump* to my fellow Stubborn Sister

nylse said...

I'm always right, that's why when teenagers think they know everything, it doesnt bother me.  They'll eventually realize I was right. :)
Of course this way of thinking only works with teens!
Yea, I'm full of random inane information that I never know when its going to come out. I guess its one of the blessings of reading all sorts of things.
I don't mind being wrong; and i don't need a support group.

rozb said...

I have the Law & Order: Criminal Intent completion certificate!

rozb said...

I heard someone once say "I'd rather be warm than right." IDK - sometimes I let him have it, even though I can Google the answer right quick and shut it down.

Leon X said...

I missed a Prince discussion on my way back from DC? *Pushes a chair over*
Oh yeah by the way, when it comes to Prince ain't nobody bad like me. © Morris Day

GrownAzzMan said...

Wise man once say, "A man can always have the last word in his house. As long as it's 'yes dear'."

Sarah said...

I dated a man for most of my 20s that was 7 years older than I am. He didn't much like it when I knew something he didn't. It's never been that big of a deal with me, though. There are some topics I know a lot about since I've read about or studied them. I don't have a very good memory so if it's trivial pursuit, you don't want me on your team. There was something I was trying to remember this morning and now I've forgotten what it was I was trying to remember. :-)

Up 4 Discussion/J said...

That conversation is so on point. It's funny how as men when we're going back and forth with a woman we try to throw a compliment in there to try and simmer things down. Unfortunately, it rarely seems to work.

I don't think it's a big deal when a person likes to be right. It only becomes a problem when they try to constantly throw it in your face or they begin to act like a know it all. I've always believed that if you know something is right, then you tell someone and they don't believe you, there is no point in arguing with them. Just like the conversation you had, he had to discover the answer for himself before conceding. That's typically the way it works. Some people find it hard to believe what others say and somehow have to prove them wrong or find the answer for themselves.

The way I see it is the truth always comes out in the end. Thus, I don't even try to waste my time proving  something I know to be a fact. I'm sure I could spend my time doing something more constructive.

Great post. I really like your blog and will have to swing back by. Feel free to check out my blog...or not. The choice is ultimately yours.

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CorettaJG said...

Of course I'm right!  

And I bring my supporting evidence to the table. lol

Jubi The Great said...

Ha! I can so relate to this. I'm known as the go-to person for random facts & other useless information in my circle of friends & family. I've also tried out for Jeopardy twice but the damn test is much harder than the show *shakes fist in anger*

Evansaw said...

I have "Hate to be wrong-itis as well".  My husband loves to challenge me,  but gets  mad when I know the answer. With him it's the 70's singing groups and who made what song.  (Columbia House was where a lot of my extra money went in High School).   People think I am too full of myself. Not True;  I just know stuff.  I read a lot, and I have always been  interested in a lot of different topics.  Is that so wrong?  Don't hate, people, just call me when you need that answer on "Millionaire"...

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