Monday, June 27, 2011

Follow-up to Ask A Bougie Chick - Sweet Justice (sort of)


Remember the tale of BZ Lady, the woman whose ex-fiance had hornswoggled her out of $16,000 to start a business and never paid back a dime? Well, here is karma for you...
Hey Chele,
Just wanted to let you know that the woman Kenny moved in with left him and cleaned out the business and the checking accounts when she left. I only know this because she tracked me down and gave me five thousand dollars in cash and said she was sorry for her part in the "previous drama"- those were her exact words. 
I admit a part of me wanted to say that if she was truly sorry, she would give me back the entire $16k but you know what, it's better than what I had. I did take someone on your blog's advice and transfer about $3,000 out of the one account of Kenny's that I still had the number on before he shut it down. So between that and this I got about half back. I'm still going ahead with the suit against him because I want that judgment on his record. 
But yes, Chele - I did chuckle to see girlfriend pull up hauling a duffle bag full of his cash. Like my great aunt Sue used to say, "Life long enough, you'll see it all come back around." 
I'm going to try and start dating again. There's been a guy but I wasn't ready. I'm at least willing to give him a coffee date.  
Thanks for all the good wishes on advice on BnB. Appreciated!
~BZLady
What do you think? Did Kenny get what he deserved? Should BZ just take the cash she got back and be done with it? What would you do at this point? Do tell...

24 comments:

Jubilance said...

Love the use of "hornswaggle" - I know we discussed interesting words on the Twitter a whle ago.

I think she should take the money she's received & be done with it. Let it go. Pursuing the lawsuit just sounds like she hasn't really let go of the situation & moved on from it. Yeah $16K is a lot of money, but at what point do you just let that burden go & move on?

mojitochica said...

LMAO!!! Seriously let this be a lesson to all:
1. Don't loan more than you feeling comfortable not getting back
2. Keep some bank accounts in your own name
3. Vet your SO's financial history and current stability BEFORE establishing joint financial accounts

CaliGirlED said...

"Yeah $16K is a lot of money, but at what point do you just let that burden go & move on? " If she loses the lawsuit. She has a legal standing and should pursue it. If for no other reason than the fact that technically she is out more than $16k because of the penalties and fees she will be charged for borrowing against her 401k. If a judge ruled against her, then I would say let it go.

As for the $5k from the ex-fiancé, take it for what it was, "she was sorry for her part in the "previous drama". That $5k has nothing to do with what he owes her. Nor did ex-fiancé stipulate that she was giving BZ Lady partial repayment on Kenny's behalf.

So to Kenny I say, "You owe Pook"!

SingLikeSassy said...

I'm of two minds on this.

The more reasonable part of me says you will likely spend up the money you have been able to recover trying to get a judgment against him so let go and let God deal with him.

The "bash Mister's head in and think about Heaven later" part of me is like take that ninja to court and when that judge slams that gavel down on his forehead he'll wish he had NEVEEEEEEEEEEER tried to stick you for your paper!

It's prolly clear from this post (and my last one on this topic) that I need Jesus. LOL!

CorettaJG said...

Mmm-hmmm, God don't like ugly.

I think she should pursue all of her legal options, although I think the self-help move of removing the money from a non joint account could come back to bite her.  As I recall, that was a non-lawyer's suggestion.  We lawyers weren't in favor of that, but so it is. 

This "should" still be a fairly easy case, especially with the recent "consciouness of guilt" type behavior by even the new girlfriend adding credibility to the claim.

Sidenote on your sidebar:  Interesting fact in light of National HIV Testing Day on 27 June, the WHO has determined that medical circumsion reduces a man's likelihood of contracting HIV by 60 percent.    http://www.npr.org/player/v2/mediaPlayer.html?action=1&t=1&islist=false&id=137442660&m=137442659

CorettaJG said...

The Color Purple was on again this weekend. This time on OWN. lol!

SingLikeSassy said...

Yeah, I was thinking, was that a joint account? Cause if so, she's probably OK, but if not....hm.

Jazzy Jazz said...

I think dude still has more coming to him. But I am not the judge. My neighbor used to say - God doesnt like ugly , but he sho'll ain't too fond of pretty either .

As far as her, I want her to get peace in her life. Forgive him, move on , and live life. I feel as though if she sues , and potentially won, the money would be held up for a long time. It doesnt sound as though he has the money laying around- which means he would scam some other woman out of the money. If suing him is how she is gonna find peace - do it . If you can just take the 8k and have peace with that - do it

rozb said...

A duffel bag full of cash? I don't know about that one. However, I still think she can move the heck on. Take the money you got, chalk it up to an expensive life lesson learned, and don't repeat your mistake. If you do repeat it, don't tell Bougieland - you might get clowned Bougie style. I'm just sayin'...

Penny said...

Since we are quoting "The Color Purple" I am thinking this one is appropriate -"Till you do right by me, everything you touch gon' turn to ish."     (Insert visual image of Celie with butcher knife in hand.)

blackprofessor said...

I would talk to a lawyer, find out my options and how much they will cost. If it will be pricey to take him to court for the sake of putting a judgment against him, it's not worth it.  If it won't cost too much to do so, then I might pursue that option. 

Mykeia said...

Good Monday morning!
Glad that she got some of the money back.
Uh, no the ex-fiance foul Fiona was not going to give her back all the $16K because: THAT MONEY WAS ALREADY SPENT.  GONE. FINISHED. DELETED...
Glad to hear that she is willing to date again.
Still on the fence if she should keep going with her suit.

Iced_Coffee_Sweet_Tea_Diva said...

Hmmm, conflicted about this one.  Karma does come back.  Good that she has received some of her money back, and the non-lawyer in me is hoping that the transfers/withdrawals all pass the legal sniff test.  Would still talk to a lawyer about the next steps, and also to an accountant (if she has not already done so) to find out if the unpaid balance can be declared a bad debt on the tax returns.    

Paul on Ice said...

I think she should have dude looked into a little bit. There's not way he woke up one day and decided to go full fraud. He may have a history of running the same scam on other women. If she can establish a pattern, that may help in her civil case.

daisy said...

Wow. I think I would take what came back and cut my losses.

Bryan Anthony said...

I'm kind of vindictive, I'd go after everything he had.

CaliGirlED said...

"If you do repeat it, don't tell Bougieland - you might get clowned Bougie style." I'm just sayin too...

CaliGirlED said...

I'm sayin Bryan $16k? That's nothing to sneeze at. And I fully admit that I'm coming from an emotional standpoint as well. I just don't know that I could walk away, even though that might be the smartest thing.

JaymeC said...

I know she needs closure but she'll have to decide between letting go and moving on and wanting revenge.

Veronica Miller said...

I might get reamed for this one, but whatevs.

I have to say, the whole "Let Go  Let God" method of dealing with things has been leaving black women on the short end of the stick for a long time. Not that I don't love God, He's the homie, but the judicial system is  in place FOR A REASON -- if no other reason than to legally hold someone accountable for the wrong they've done.

Yeah, ol girl stiffed him and showed up with five grand. That's cool. But he STILL hasn't paid YOU for taking advantage of your generosity and 401(k). (Seriously, I am STILL not over the 401(k) part. My retirement? Son, you tryna "build a future" and you want to empty my for-the-future nest egg? Get thee ENTIRE [bleep] out of here.)

The idea that God or karma or universe will handle everything is noble, but when people KNOW you won't take tangible and decisive action against them, what's stopping them from testing God/karma/the universe in the first place? People need to know that there are tangible and immediate consequences for messing with you -- or your money. Get that 16K back, stat.

happinessisme said...

If she has a legal case then she might want to seriously persue. Like someone else said, this fraud thing might be his m.o. 

TypeALady said...

Life is all about choices...choose wisely.  I feel bad that sistergirl lost 16K+, but it was a choice she made to give someone that was not her legal anything that money.  When in doubt, ask the people that have known you all of your life AND have nothing but your best interest at heart for their opinion.  Ultimately, the final decision is yours to make as you alone will be the only one to either reap the benefits or deal with the consequences of said decision.  She should seek legal counsel for possible remedies, if only to settle her mind, but after that, she needs to chalk it up to a REALLY HARD LIFE LESSON, take her 8K and move forward ...with her 401K under lock and key until it's time to retire.

Mina B. said...

I remember when I first read that post I really HATED that dude. I probably would limit my legal recourse since that costs money and even if she wins he still might not pay. However I would still be pretty.freeking.salty so if heard through the grapevine that cousin pookie nem stole his car, sold it for parts and just so happened to give me a really nice cash happy-4th-of-July gift......I'd probably feel better. But that wouldn't be bougie now would it?

Leo the Yardie Chick said...

I'm mixed. While I agree that it's best to let go and move on, this guy reeks of being a professional shyster. As someone said below, perhaps there is a way to get The Law to look closely at him without breaking even more of your bank in a law suit.

I'm laughing like that kid in The Simpsons over the Jump Off Rip-Off, though. Hehehehe. >:3

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