Friday, April 22, 2011

Learning not to take the bait


There must be a sensor. Some sort of tingly spidey sense that men possess that tells them that their ex is in a happy place with someone else and have moved on. Fellas, am I right? Do you have a commission that keeps an eye on these things and sends out coded signals to let you know? Inquiring minds want to know because I swear it's uncanny. 

The very minute I relax and say, "You know what? This could be good. This could be what happy feels like," something wicked this way comes. In the form of a text or missed phone call indicator or the like.

But guess what? I finally learned. No one says you have to return a call or answer a ringing phone. That is why the tech gods created the IGNORE button. That's right. Just don't take the bait. If someone's dead, they can send an email about the funeral. If someone's sick, they can text the hospital address. If they just want to say they're sorry? We already know. Got news? Tell it to someone who is still required to give two shakes of a damn. Otherwise, I have nothing left to say except...

No. Thank. You. As a matter of fact, how cool would that be? If you had a "no thank you" setting for contacts so that if they called, emailed or texted they would get a pleasant voice and icon saying, "No thank you." That would rock.

Yes, good citizens of BnB. For the first time in I don't know how long. I ignored the missed calls from Certain Someone Upon Whom Many Years and Tears Were Wasted. The freedom of confirming that BlackBerry question, "Are you sure you want to delete?" - YES! Epic moment. Like booty dancing in the middle of the afternoon goodness. 

Just had to share. I know it's not a revelation. I know you are supposed to surgically excise human cancers from your life. But I finally learned to take my own advice. That's celebration-worthy.


Oh, I just got schooled. Apparently women do the ill-fated, unwarranted, malicious and untimely tapback too. My bad. Everybody should stop that. Seriously. Eyes forward. Nothing to see here.  Thoughts?

28 comments:

Penny said...

I am going to print this out and hang it up in my office.

Enjoy your Easter!

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Ha! Yes it is freeing to get to the point where you ignore the tap back and keep it moving. After a certain point, there IS no point.

But, I will attest that there are such things as spidey senses and all that wahoo. "THE Ex" and I broke up in 2003. In 2009 I started feeling a ... pressure...some kind of ghost sensation (I don't wear rings) on my all important finger. I got happy thinking my current beau was going to propose (so didn't happen lol) and it turns out the sensation appeared when The Ex and his fiancee put the deposit down on their wedding venue (a mutual associate, his ex-FWB told me trying to be messy). Honestly, if I hadn't been boo'd up, I probably would have thought to call him to get that final nail in the coffin straight from the horses mouth. Or, I would have thought long and hard about doing it while I restrained myself and drowned my sorrows in Malbec.

Hidi said...

Good for you. :) Have a safe holiday weekend.

The_A said...

*clink* Cheers to you OneChele!

You know you're good when its not an angry done its just a No Thank You Random Telemarketer Done.

Oh, & kindly remove me from your contact list...
*tilts head w cheery smile* ThAAnks!

maureen palmer said...

Wowwwwwww.... sending a certain family member here, she needs to read this like yesterday. Another great post.

Happy Easter everyone!

Sarah said...

Good for you! I'm glad you are in a happy place :-) Living life in real time is a good idea.

Cassie said...

That's true freedom! And toast worthy indeed. Happy Good Friday!

Paul on Ice said...

Yes, we have a network of undercover operatives that track the happiness level of all our prior s/o's - the minute it reaches a certain level, we pounce. We can't have you happy without us.

SarcasticSnark dot com...

Earthangel172 said...

Kudos to you!

CaliGirlED said...

Good for you Chele! That's butterfly freedom right there!...Happy Good Friday and Resurrection Day to you and your family!

blackprofessor said...

That is fabulous! It sounds like you have been set free right around Resurrection Day, what a coincidence!

CaliSlim said...

*clinking a glass of champizzle with you*

Good for you. It's such a liberating feeling to ignore the tap back. Even more so when they reach out again to let you know they got the hint and you ignore that too. LOL

He's risen! LOL

Andrea M said...

I need to know the secret! How did you turn the corner? What made you decide 'not this time'?

Jason P said...

*snickering*

Rob said...

Really thought women had that spidey sense thing down to a science

GammasWorld said...

Cheers! Isn't it wonderful when we can take our own advice and learning and apply it ourselves?

Stank_0 said...

I have no desire to tapback, check in, whatever other little cute euphemism there is for this. Maybe it's my personality.

Now if I'm tap'd back... if you gon offer it up... (just kiddin...sorta)

Leo the Yardie Chick said...

I shall keep this in mind if I end up in Tap Back territory.

OneChele said...

Decided there was nothing that would positively impact my world by answering. I seriously doubt he had a million dollars and a house in Bali to gift me. And if he did, he could send the check and title by FedEx ;-)

CaliGirlED said...

I quit you on this Good Friday!!!

thinklikeRiley said...

Good for ya and alladat.
Where da bottle at?
I'm ready for a sip.

David Chase said...

*whispers* Bougie gangsta.

rozb said...

It is an awesome and exhilarating feeling to ignore the call without feeling a need to answer, or to just delete an email, text message, or voicemail without opening. I did it to my ex before I even met my S.O. because I was finally in a good place and loving life. Yessir - nothing like hitting the button and continuing to do what you were doing, even if it was just ironing shirts or something.

In other words, you relegate them to the same category as robo-calls and (back in the olden days) bill collectors.

Annette Evans said...

"Raise your glass".

Pellinore said...

So glad to be in BougieLand! Lend me your wisdom. :)

Melzie said...

You're right, Chele. It's fuggin' liberating! Unless you absolutely have a good reason too (can't think of not a one at the moment, but to each his own...), why waste more precious time on it again?


*grabs adult beverage and puts toesies on the ottoman ;-)*

SassyJJ said...

I couldn't comment at work (boo) but I was clapping for you, OneChele! I'm working on that lesson, too, that some folks/things/situations need to stay in the past...nothing good by bringing it into my present.

Iced_Coffee_Sweet_Tea_Diva said...

This ----> "I ignored the missed calls from Certain Someone Upon Whom Many Years and Tears Were Wasted."
Break in your shoes that hurt your feet; delete relationships that hurt your psyche and your soul. Cheers to you!!

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