What I wanna know, baby
If what we had was good
How come U don't call me anymore?
Yes, today we're talking about the phone drama! Ladies (sent in 24 questions on this topic) want to know:
- Will he call?
- Won't he call?
- How can I get him to call?
- Should I call or send a text?
- He said he would call but he hasn't?
- I would call but I don't want to seem pressed?
- He used to call and now he doesn't?
- He said he's too busy to call but I see him sending tweets and updating his FB status…
Arrgh! So much drama over communication. There's such a passive-aggressive power struggle over who calls whom and when! But this week isn't about my opinions. I enlisted the services of two of the BnB brethren to share their opinions. I asked the question – If everything is all good, why would you stop calling?
First up to answer the question, resident rabble-rouser @ThinkLikeRiley:
Man don't want, man don't call. It's Just. That. Simple. Naw, sis – I ain't trapped under a building or playing it cool. I'm doing something else with someone else who is not you. Maybe you thought it was all good, guess I didn't so I'm gone. If I change my mind, I'll call you back. Meanwhile, if you really feenin' for a brotha, hit him up and let him know. You may get lucky. 3:00 am gets lonely. I don't say this ish to be mean, I'm just being real.
Ooo. Wee. Next up to answer the question is @MeetCharlieL:
There could be a hundred reasons why I haven't called… yet. I'm working, I'm sleepy, I'm out of town, we're not exclusive and I'm seeing more than one person, my phone died, I initiated the call the last ten times and I'm waiting on you to call me or I'm dialing your number right now! Ladies have got to chill out. If the script was flipped and the woman didn't call me, I'd call her and say what's up. If she blows me off, I fall back. Sure, I wonder what happened, why we went from "all systems go" to "do not enter" but I won't obsess over it. I think the bigger question is – what happens when one person thinks it's "all good" and the other person doesn't? But back to your point. If a man wants to be with you, he will find a way. Believe that.
And alright then. BougieLand, do you agree with Riley? Charlie? Ladies and gents, who has done the fade to black no explanation? What's the latest in phone call etiquette? Who calls who first? How long should it take to return a call or text? Who (like me) believes that same or better communication should be returned (i.e – if I call, don't text me back)? Thoughts, comments, insights? The floor is yours…