Monday, March 14, 2011

Question for the fellas – Do all men lie?

Welcome to Questions for the Fellas Week (the remix). The ladies came guns a-blazing to the table. Gents, don't shoot the messenger. I'm just relaying what I was asked. And I received no less than fifteen questions revolving around the dishonesty of menfolk. Ruh-roh. Take a look at a few:
  1. Why do men lie?
  2. Do all men lie?
  3. Why can't men just be honest?
  4. What's wrong with a man just being straight forward?
  5. How do I know if a man is telling me the truth?
And so it went. In the interest of fact-finding, I sat down with two men: @DavidLChase (David) and his friend @AnotherWord43 (Trey) and asked the question – Do all men lie?
David – All people lie. Men tend to get caught more often. Maybe women are more suspicious or have better dishonesty radars.
Trey – I'm offended by the question. No, I'm lying. Yes, all men lie. We tell small lies just to keep the drama to a minimum. Women tell big lies to keep from getting cut. There's a difference.
Me (to Trey) – Tell me you're joking.
Trey – I could tell you that, but I'd be lying.
Me (to David) – I hate your friend.
David – He has that effect on women.
Me (to both) – Seriously, you both are telling me that all men lie about everything? That's what you want the takeaway to be?
Trey – Oh, are these life lessons for the ladies? Let me think. Umm, no – men don't lie about everything all the time. But we own the victimless lie.
Me (blinking) – I'm sorry? What exactly is a victimless lie?
Trey – "Yes, I took the trash out" "No I wouldn't do Kim Kardashian" "Yes, those jeans look good" "Sure it's okay if we watch The Notebook again" "No I didn't see her boobs spilling out of that dress, I was looking at you, baby" Victimless lies.
Me (to David) – Are you cosigning this?
David (shifting uneasily) – I plead the fifth.
Me – That's not allowed. We're going to need an answer.
David – I'm not sure there's such a thing as a victimless lie. I mean telling a woman she looks good in jeans when she obviously doesn't just hurts humanity.
Me (rolling my eyes) – Why not just shoot straight?
Trey – Honesty can be brutal. Let's say I meet a chick –
Me – A woman.
Trey – Fine, yes, a woman. Let's say I met a woman online and we're vibin' with the chatter and all. Then I met her in person and she's a total dog.
Me – Unattractive.
Trey – You're like the political correctness police. Sorry. Yes, she's very unattractive. I can't say, sorry I'm no longer interested because the ugly stick beat you down. That would be mean.
Me – Not to mention shallow.
Trey РTouch̩. But you see what I mean. It's easier to cut the meeting short and then send a text saying I met someone else I like better.
Me – Why can't you just say the chemistry isn't there? It's a way to say that the attraction wasn't there without being mean or lying.
Trey – Can I use that? Cuz truthfully, I don't always stop and think of the nicest way to put things, I focus on the end result. If I say "A" then I can do "B" – and I want the easiest most direct route from A to B. Men don't like complicated. If it's quick and easy, that's 90% the way they'll go.
David – Okay, I have to disagree on that one. I'm a talker. I prefer to take a little extra time and think about what I'm saying before I say it. If I do tell a lie, it's for a good reason.
Me – And what is a good reason to lie?
David – To spare someone's feelings or to cover someone until the right time to tell the truth comes along.
Me – The right time to tell the truth?
David – C'mon now. It's not always the best time to blurt out the bald truth to people. Sometimes tongues need to be held for a minute. And let's be honest, there are a few things all of us could probably take to the grave and feel okay about that.
Trey – See, David has to qualify things and make them complicated. Go with my victimless theory. It's catchy.
Me (shaking head) – Thank you, gentlemen for sharing. I'll present this to BougieLand and see what they think.
Trey – Whoa, like a critique? 
David – Man, listen. Wait and see.
Trey – Am I going to regret this? Could I get voted off the island? I just got here. 
Me – Ha! Let's find out…
BougieLand, what say you? Does everybody lie? Do men lie more often? Are women just better at detecting lies? Is there any such thing as a "victimless lie"? Do you believe that there is a good reason to lie? Are there some things we should just take to the grave? Do you think omitting details is the same as a lie? What do you think about what David and Trey had to say? You know the rules: Answer one, none or any number in between. Share your thoughts. The floor is yours…

100 comments:

Lady Chelle said...

llmmmmaao i love this!!!!

Reads4Pleasure said...

That conversation was absolutely hilarious! As far as Trey getting voted off the island, who let him on in the first place? SECURITY!

MelaninEnriched said...

First, I loved the dialogue! To answer the questions: Yes, I think all people lie. Also, yes, men do lie more often. The problem is, it may be keeping the peace now, but it generally comes out and then there is no peace (or piece) later. It's just better to be up front and say whatever you have to say tactfully. Men think women can't handle the truth, but we can; it's the delivery that might get you cut though. Yes, women are better at detecting lies, better at telling them, better at not getting caught telling them and better at letting men believe they got away with telling said lies. There's no such thing as a "victimless lie". I believe there is a good reason to tell the truth at the right time (co-signing David). Yes, there are some things you need to take to your grave. Omitting details is the same as lying. Saying you're going to a club and not mentioning it's a STRIP club is lying by omission.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Bwahahahaha!!! This conversation was funny.

1. Everyone has told a lie or two, but all people do not make a habit of lying.
2. i truly believe men lie more often. And tend to lie about stuff to avoid the small "drama" that ends up blowing up in their face later, causing big drama. An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure.
3. I don't believe there are such things as victimless lies, just some lies cover more weighty/serious issues.
4. People can convince themselves there are excuses, er, reasons to lie. I think there are strong disincentives to tell the 100% truth and nothing but the truth if it will end up costing you something. Like Michele said, you can be tactful to avoid hurting someone's feelings if the truth is just too "much". But, if you are being deceitful, and trying to get one over someone, then you have no excuse and you deserve whatever karma throws back at you.
5. Let me recount an exchange w/ my mother to answer this next one:
Mom: "How are you doing in Government."
H.S. Me: "Not too bad. I'm doing well enough to meet my goals for that class."
Mom: "So are your grades okay? How are you getting along with the teacher? I know you and Mr. SoandSo didn't get along last semester."
Me: "Me and Mr. Soandso haven't had any disagreements since last semester, and I'm not overly concerned about the grade I'm going to get in that class."
Mom: "[Just_A_Thought], you better stop lying to me. I know you have been skipping that class, and you have a D. How you gonna fix your lips to say that everything is fine in that class?"
Me: " I didn't say everything was fine, nor did I say I had a high grade. I said that I'm doing well enough to meet my goal (graduation), which I can do with a D, and that me and Mr.SoandSo haven't had any disagreements. Which we haven't because I can't stand to sit in that man's classroom."
Mom: Epic backhand.

So yes, omitting details is tantamount to lying. What might work for an attorney, a corporation, a marketing strategy, or a politician is not the best policy for everyday life.

taut_7 said...

i believe that everyone lies. men don't lie more than women. women don't lie more than me. perhaps women go looking for evidence of lies more than men and therefore the perception is that men lie more because we get caught more.

i know a lie a lot to avoid hurting someone's feelings. women always say they would rather know the truth but in those situations where i gave her the truth, she acted as if she would have preferred i lied to her. make up your mind. you want the ugly truth or a pretty lie? 99% of women would say they want the ugly truth until its staring them right in the face then they have second thoughts.

Lady4Real said...

BougieCuz, do you have my house bugged? I just had one of the biggest arguments of my relationship with my husband last week because of this subject right here. He subscribes to what Trey calls the 'victimless' lie, he justifies it by deciding to lie if the lie doesn't directly affect me. Example, we are both in school, he gets paid to go to school (he's an Army vet) if he is failing a class he won't tell me, but he'll act like he is going to class until I notice something isn't right and I ask, then he'll tell me or he'll wait until grades come out and tell me, he stopped going midsemester. Why didn't he just tell me in the 1st place that he was struggling? He didn't want me to be disappointed in him, most of his lies are centered around his pride and how I percieve him, he lies to keep me happy because he doesn't want me stressing or burdened with his issues. I call 'BS' he can lie to the rest of the world but I'm his partner for life so he needs to be honest with me because I'm honest with him. There are just some people I will not lie to and that I don't expect to lie to me. We've had this talk and he seems to get it, but only time will tell.
Bougieland, do you notice that men seem to lie to protect their image?

Lady4Real said...

2. i truly believe men lie more often. And tend to lie about stuff to avoid the small "drama" that ends up blowing up in their face later, causing big drama. An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure

THIS.RIGHT.HERE. Just tell the damn truth, you get in less trouble when you are honest, then when you lie, get caught and confess.

Just_A_Thought said...

"i know a lie a lot to avoid hurting someone's feelings. women always say they would rather know the truth but in those situations where i gave her the truth, she acted as if she would have preferred i lied to her. make up your mind. you want the ugly truth or a pretty lie? 99% of women would say they want the ugly truth until its staring them right in the face then they have second thoughts."

Mayhaps it's not that the person is having second thoughts, but just reacting to the truth you just told. Yes, telling the truth may result in hurt feelings, but it does not mean that the person requesting the truth is prevented from having said feelings. It's like free speech - yes, you may say whatever you well please, but you cannot control how people react, interpret, or respond to what you say. The truth is not some get out of jail free card for dealing with a woman's reaction.

Natasha Hunter said...

Does everybody lie?

Yeppers, some with ill-conceived justification, others with reckless abandon, some with thoughtful consideration.

Do men lie more often? Are women just better at detecting lies?

I wouldn't say men lie more often, or women are neccessarily better at detecting because I know some chicks... o-O believe EVERYTHING that fall out of someone's mouth but I will say this...men are less prepared for the follow-on questions.

Is there any such thing as a "victimless lie"?

Yeah there is... just not so much in an established relationship.

Do you believe that there is a good reason to lie? Are there some things we should just take to the grave?

Emphatically yes on both accounts, but on the first question it really depends on what kind of person you are in a relationship with.

Do you think omitting details is the same as a lie?
Ugh... this is a tough one. Sometimes.

What do you think about what David and Trey had to say?
I appreciate the "real talk" from Trey, he's probably more in the majority than David so it's good to know what's going on in some of the mens minds.

Natasha Hunter said...

"It's like free speech - yes, you may say whatever you well please, but you cannot control how people react, interpret, or respond to what you say. The truth is not some get out of jail free card for dealing with a woman's reaction."

Ok & Alright!?! Spot promotion for you! :)

blackprofessor said...

This was too funny and I am dead at politcal correctness police!!!

People lie and some are pathological with it! There are somethings we all should take to our graves. However, if there is something going on in a relationship that affects the other person and they need to know, lies by omission or comission are wrong!

I don't think men lie more that women, but I do think that a lot of men (some women too) lie when they need to provide an uncomfortable and inconvenient truth to a current/prospective partner. It becomes much easier to lie rather than deliver the truth with tact and diplomacy, ala Trey.

TreyCharles said...

Hey now - scoot over and let a brother sit down before you boot him out the door.

taut_7 said...

i'm not trying to control anyone's actions after i tell them the truth but when you straight up tell me that i should have kept that to myself then i question why you told me to tell you the truth in the first place.

TreyCharles said...

But really, who do I hurt by omitting "strip" from the sentence? And if you're worried about it, we can put a pole in the bedroom and you can shake your shimmy. Wait. Before you kick me out. Y'all know these just jokes, right?!

TreyCharles said...

Bruh. *extends fist* Dap me up.

TreyCharles said...

What image? Do you mean ego? Yes, we may swerve around the truth for that.

MonP said...

"Men think women can't handle the truth, but we can"

I think most women can handle the truth, but unfortunately the ones that can't make a lot of noise in the process. I would guess that most men have been involved with or one of their boys was involved with someone that couldn't handle the truth and negatively affected that circle of friends for the rest of us.

TreyCharles said...

I keep telling David that I'm Batman and he's Robin but he won't go for it.

TreyCharles said...

This is clever how Mz. Chele got me sounding intelligent/ignant, classy/crass all at the same time.

OneChele said...

Ha! That's all you, playboy. ;-)

OneChele said...

That's all you playboy - ha! ;-)

Natasha Hunter said...

Uh...can't say I blame him, if I'm running around in draws, I'mma at least want to wear the big ones :)

Jason P said...

Anyone who tells you that they are 100% truthful 100% of the time is lying.

OneChele said...

Ha! That's all you, playboy ;-)

OneChele said...

My only problem with the "victimless lie" is this: little lie, big lie. The easier all those sweet little lies (see what I did there?) roll off the tongue, the easier the big one fall too. IMHO

AppleBerryMIA said...

BWAHAHA - not the "stripper pole" solution? You are a mess!

Grace said...

Good point.

Lady4Real said...

By image I do mean the ever so precious male ego. Are you saying men lie to preserve their ego? Does your ego really matter in a dedicated relationship? Would you risk your relationship for your ego?

TreyCharles said...

Yeah but you were supposed to make me sound good!

TreyCharles said...

I can't argue with that.

TreyCharles said...

"ala Trey" - Daddy likes.

TreyCharles said...

Clever.

thinklikeRiley said...

Riley cosigning.
Trey spitting truth.
David playing nice to get next to Lady La Bouge. I ain't mad playa, we see you working.
Ev'body lie. Some betta than others.

thinklikeRiley said...

I like this cat.

thinklikeRiley said...

Throttle back, homegirl. We got you. Know this - a man will do bat shit crazy things to keep himself on whatever height pedestal you put him. Every man wanna be Superman for their woman.

OneChele said...

People pay me to write fiction, sir. I don't do it for free.

TreyCharles said...

Let me pick the buckshout out my ass. David didn't tell me the bougie kitten had claws! Ha! We cool, Ma. This was fun.

TreyCharles said...

Let me pick the buckshout out my ass. David didn't tell me the bougie kitten had claws! Ha! We cool, Ma. This was fun.

Jamie Wesley said...

Trey – "You're like the political correctness police. Sorry. Yes, she's very unattractive. I can't say, sorry I'm no longer interested because the ugly stick beat you down. That would be mean."

Hilarious. Horrible, but hilarious. There are few things in this world I appreciate more than honesty. I like knowing where I stand. It might hurt at the time, but I don't have any questions, and I can move on.

I believe men and women lie. I don't know who lies more. Personally, I find telling the truth is usually the better bet. I'll try to come up with something less truthful/hurtful, but most of the time, I just say, "screw it" and tell the truth. If I can find a nice way to say it, great, but I've been called blunt more than once in my life. I find it easier to get to the point and I don't have any lies to remember.

Props to you, Michele, for the follow up questions and not letting them get away with anything.

Steve said...

I don't think men lie more often. I do think men omit details, women keep bigger secrets.

David Chase said...

What can I say - I look better in black.

maureen palmer said...

I know The Patriot Act is in full effect, but why do I feel like Chele is listening in to our family conversations. My cousin just found her husband has been telling big lies (i.e not married going thro'separation as he carrys on with a side relationshiP). Needless to mention, she is going to beat him to the divorce court.
I believe both women and men lie, I guess to protect the victim, which is not right. Tell me the truth so I can deal with it now not at the kids graduation. In Chele's word Le Sigh

JohnKinPDX said...

In my last disastrouus pile of shiggity relationship, I told lies like - of course I don't mind waiting for the wedding night, yes it makes sense to spend $6k on custom engraved do-dads. SHE told lies like - no, I'm not sleeping with anyone else, you're the only man I ever loved.
I know I'm sipping on bitter ale but ur uh, seemed like my lies were a bit more "victimless" than hers.

William Martin said...

Like anything else- there are levels. "That dress is nice" is different from "She's just a friend" and then there is that one person we know who is completely pathological and wouldn't know the truth if it kicked them in the ass.

JaymeC said...

This is true. Telling lies is like eating potato chips - no one has just one.

Lady4Real said...

I'm surprsied that you didn't quote Weezy, "Men lie, women lie but the money don't lie."

Lady4Real said...

And the more you eat the fatter your get. The more you lie, the bigger the lies become and the heavier it is to carry around all that weight.

Uglyblackjohn said...

Well... more being mendacious than liars.
IMOHO - Men usually say what they think women want to hear.
People lie about what is most valuable them.
Poor people lie about how much they have, the unlearned try to use bigger words than necessary, unpopular people try to get attention,...
They aren't lying as much as they are trying to be what they are not.
Most people try to cover up their insecurities with falsehoods.

Lady4Real said...

I can totally respect and understand that, I have 3 older brothers, 2 sons and was raised by my Dad, but lieing is just so freaking annoying.

Mony_Mony said...

"There are few things in this world I appreciate more than honesty. I like knowing where I stand. It might hurt at the time, but I don't have any questions, and I can move on."

This, a million times! That's the one thing that bothers me the most about this whole dating game, emphasis on game. Just be straight with me so that I can delete you from my phone and keep it moving.

Stank_0 said...

I'll say this, I do not believe all men lie. There are some people and things I will be absolutely blunt about. If I lie it's because I can tell by context one answer will get a negative response and one answer will get a less negative response. Path of least resistance.

I've lied to keep the peace, and it worked until I was honest with myself and realized that what I wanted (and actively going after it) was gonna disrupt the peace. Then I moved accordingly.

Mony_Mony said...

Hmm, I guess I have too much ego too, because I used to do almost the exact same thing with my ex-SO. I always did well in my classes, but sometimes I just didn't feel like going. I would tell him that class was canceled or I didn't have class at that time in order to prevent him from being disappointed in me for being lazy. At the time I thought they were victimless lies, because it never affected my grades, but now I think that a pattern of lying over little things can affect the trust in your relationship, even if the other person doesn't consciously realize that you're lying.

Monstadon said...

Chuurch.

100.

Monstadon said...

Wow. I saw this topic around 9:am and it was empty...I just knew it would blew up...and seems I thought correctly.

Listen...stop it with the dividing crap. No one sex or group has the monopoly on not telling the truth. Everyone lies...and for as many lies there are, there's just as many reasons that people tell those lies.

Oh...and...omission of information is also LYING.

Good topic and responses.

100.

GrownAzzMan said...

"Men live, women lie, numbers don't."

People lie. Men and Women. They do it for the same reason anyone does anything, to gain a benefit or avoid pain. Women are just plain better at it IMHO.

Your girl "C" said...

OUCH!

Natasha Hunter said...

I mean really just imagine if men told the truth in a relationship all the time:

"You don't ever need to try and make my momma's biscuits again."
"If I would've met your sister first..."
"I mean the way you did it was aiight, but I liked when my girlfriend in college did it like..."
"Baby you wearing that dress but the chick at the gas station was KILLIN' it!!"

I'm being extreme (and silly) but when you ask for complete honesty it could very well go that way. My take is if my SO tells little "fibs" here and there and it doesn't effect my health or wealth-chill, but pay attention. Flip out over the little things and they'll try much harder to conceal the big ones.

FreeBlackMan said...

No one keeps it 100/100 - let's not even pretend. It's not a man/woman thing. People's first instinct is to cover dey own azz. Dey Own Azz. Period.

Carey Jackson said...

HA!!! It's like that movie where the guy can read women's minds. I never want that superpower with men. Keep some of that to yourself.

Leon X said...

I always lie. I never tell the truth.

Carey Jackson said...

Awww - {{{cyber hug}}}

Carey Jackson said...

What's the difference between a lie and a secret?!

CaliGirlED said...

Damn John!!! That comparison is everything! I don't know what else to say.

CaliGirlED said...

Hmmm...

CaliGirlED said...

"What Women Want" with Mel Gibson. Yeah I feel you on that!

CaliGirlED said...

LOL!!!

CaliGirlED said...

I believe you! LOL!!!

datdudeincali said...

A friend of mine used to say - Assume that I'm lying that way when I tell the truth, you'll be pleasantly surprised. LOL

kjnetic aka Peter Parker said...

shoutout to Sergeant 'Chele of the PC Precinct.. *plays Law & Order theme*

i agree with both guys...yeah, we lie...but i think, as many of the guys in the comments pointed out, it's about *what* we lie about...and i think the reasons are:
1) anything to keep the peace/reduce the drama
2) pride/ego

if it's some "how do i look" question...ehhh...if i want to keep the peace, i'll say "yeah, sure"...because if we say no, that leaves you in a pissy mood...homies don't get none = not winning.

if it's something big/important, i personally believe honesty is the 2nd best policy...the BEST policy, is putting oneself in a position where lying wouldn't be necessary in the first place

JohnKinPDX said...

{hugs back} I'll take it. I ain't proud.

rozb said...

A secret is just a lie of omission.

JohnKinPDX said...

Well when you lie, isn't the truth the secret?

Page Bartlett said...

So I'm the only one who'se going to mention how suspect old boy looks in the photo? Hmpfh.

Page Bartlett said...

Side-eye AND a hmmmm....

rozb said...

Hmm...It is true that everybody lies. I have found that men tend to lie so as to not hurt feelings. Women tend to lie more about personal things. For instance, a man will lie about why they don't call, or if he was looking at somebody else while out with his S.O. He would lie about stuff not necessary to lie about. I had an ex that kept ringing my bullsh!# detector by lying about stuff too stupid to lie about. One time, I asked him what time he got home one night - he said a time about three hours earlier than the actual time, and said he slid in while I was sleep. That ninja knew I was worse than the Princess and the Pea - I know when and what time anything happens in my house. When I confronted him about it, he said "I don't know. You caught me off guard with that question!" That was the last time I had a relationship with somebody that was that deficient in intelligence.

A woman lies about her weight, her age, her "issues" more readily, and even dress sizes. To be honest - if it wasn't for the fact that I have to stand on a scale at the doctor's office, she would not NEVA know my real weight. We lie to a girlfriend to keep her from losing confidence (for the most part) so she doesn't go spiraling into anxiety. "Girl! You don't need Spanx with that bandage dress! If they don't like your shape, they're just hatin'!" I tell my friends to please tell me if I am wearing makes me look like two midgets fighting in a trash bag. We can be our own worst enemy sometimes.

BrendaKay said...

It is a proven fact that babies lie in an effort to get attention, and toddlers will lie to avoid getting into trouble. So men certainly don't own the patent on lying. We have all been lying in some manner since we entered this life and will probably continue to do so until we take our last breath.

I thought Trey's answers were absolutely hilarious and he shouldn't be kicked off of Bougie Island ~ perhaps a day or two in Bougie Time Out is more appropriate. But there is one very unpleasant, unappealing, and deeply hurtful aspect to the so-called "victimless lie" ~ selfish individuals tend to use this sort of lie to justify locking lips or stirring the cocoa with someone other than their significant other.

If I'm taking the time to ask my man if a particular dress doesn't look good on me, then the chances are I already know that it doesn't look on me. So spare me the nonsense about not wanting to hurt my feelings. Be truthful. Because I won't hesitate to tell you that your bright neon yellow Stacy Adams zoot suit makes you look like Ronald McDonald minus the clown shoes. :-)

Jubilance said...

Everybody lies, EVERYBODY. The question is, why are they lying? The idea of lying to keep the peace - I understand it but at the same time, its kinda lame. There's a big difference between outright lying, and having some tact. Example - telling a woman "no you don't look fat in that" when really she looks like she was stuffed in a sausage casing. You don't have to say "wow you look totally fat & horrible!" but instead you could say "well that outfit isn't as flattering on your as this one?". See the difference there?

A lot of men have this misguided idea that all women want to be lied to, and can't handle the truth. Sorry fellas, but you received some incorrect information on that one. Just because 1 or a few women had trouble with the truth, doesn't mean that all women want to be lied to. Also, are you really comfy with lying to your SO so easily?

There are definitely some things that should be taken to the grave. But is that truly a lie? It only is if someone needs that information & you directly omit it from them or tell them an untruth. But something that really isn't their biz? Totally within your right to keep it to yourself.

Lying by omission is still lying in Jubi's book.

GrownAzzMan said...

Two things:
1) You really don't want to know what we are thinking most of the time
2) I almost always involves sex, sometimes even with you

OneChele said...

I have stopped doing this with my girlfriends. I now say - That dress would be bangin' with Spanx and two weeks on a liquid diet. Friends don't let friends jiggle inappropriately ;-)

OneChele said...

BK FTW!!!!!

GrownAzzMan said...

#shotsfired

C Nelson said...

*winces on Trey's behalf, 'cause I swear I felt that all the way over here.*

keishabrown said...

#BOOM #POW #ZIING!

BrendaKay said...

"...two midgets fighting in a trash bag." ~ I can hardly breath from laughing so hard.

derek love said...

PC Police. Classic.

derek love said...

Dude called Chele a "bougie kitten" on his first day in BougieLand. *falls out*
The Contessa doesn't play sir.

NATAHU77 said...

LOL

CorettaJG said...

Yeah, don't even get me started with the I'm-not-going-to-tell-her-I-cheated-on-her-because-that-would-be-unfair-to-HER crap.

Perhaps it's just me, but I rarely ask other people how I look in something. I know how I look in something, I'm looking in the mirror.

CorettaJG said...

Tact is key. It doesn't hurt to use some of that home training.

Moabmu said...

Exactly!! Tears are flowing AND I'm about to choke - now THAT was funny!!

udonthave2likeme said...

Check and Mate....lol

udonthave2likeme said...

Love the quote. It's turrible but I still love it..

sol_dier said...

'everyday, people... they lie to God too
so what makes you think, that they won't lie to you' - Lauryn Hill.

There are people lying to themselves right on this very thread.
Since when did Calm, introspective, peaceful, contemplative & conflict adverse become male traits?.
Since when did: insecurity, emotional immaturity & drama become female traits?

Le Sigh.
People lie. Across the board. People lie to start wars. people lie to acquire stuff. men, women, children e'rybody and WE are all equally as good at it.

KGDC said...

Let me ask a question: Do all women tell the truth?

Since the rhetorical answer to the rhetorical question is 'no' for both questions, we can move on...

We all bend the truth, lie or OMIT things for our own personal reasons. For some, they can't help but lie... for others it's a matter of embarrassment or pride.

Either way... we ALL lie about something... either to oursevles of others.

So let me answer your question in another way since I'm thinking about it. Do all men lie? Yes. So do all women... we ALL lie about something.

Are all men LIARS? No. Neither are all women.

Generalities never serve an arguement well.

CaliGirlED said...

"...two midgets fighting in a trash bag." *kneels down to pray for Roz* "Help her Lawd!" LOL!!!

CaliGirlED said...

"Friends don't let friends jiggle inappropriately." *screams at Chele* "T-shirt please!"

CaliGirlED said...

Because I won't hesitate to tell you that your bright neon yellow Stacy Adams zoot suit makes you look like Ronald McDonald minus the clown shoes. *DEAD*

Alvin Milton said...

I think we as men tend to gauge the possible outcomes of not being forthright with the ladies... going through different scenarios and determining whether the level of fallout is tolerable or not. The problem is, sometimes we mess up (lightweight or real bad) and its compounded by a woman's "over-analytical" nature and the fact that she doesn't forget ish EVER.

So that lightweight omission/screwup can get blown out of proportion (fellas holler if u hear me) and we will NEVER live it down. Things could be going swell for a year or two post-screw up and then she might flip into some other ish one day when her mood swing talking bout "yeah remember when I asked you that question and you paused before u answered, ya blk son of a B" and then we fighting so... Because we know who you are and what you can handle and our natural aversion to drama (can I come home and just get a sandwich and look at some TV please), we will be less than straightforward with you lot.

Call it damage control.

Brneyed1 said...

Everybody lies. But since this week is about the fellas, let me say this: please don't think those "victimless lies" don't eventually cause harm.

For those women who DO want hear the lies, you are creating a false reality for her that becomes increasingly difficult to maintain. At some point it will falter; THEN what do you do??

For those women (like me) who don't want to hear the lies, every time you do, I lose a little more respect for you. When I ask you a question, respect me enough to be honest (not hurtful) with me.

Untouched Jewel said...

"I tell my friends to please tell me if I am wearing makes me look like two midgets fighting in a trash bag." I COULDN'T STOP BUSTING UP LAUGHING AT THIS! OH JESUS! True and utter comedy! I'm about to cough up a lung reading this...

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails