Fellow BougieLand dwellers, winter is upon us. If not officially on the calendar, definitely by the temperatures some of us are experiencing. We haven't reviewed any bougie etiquette lately. Let's talk winter basics of WBPD (What Bougie People Do):
1. Wear a real coat - Fellas, you aren't fooling anybody with that thin leather jacket that has clearly seen better days. Ladies, the shawl/wrap is decorative. Bougie grown folks need bougie grown folk outerwear. That means full length coats, hats, gloves and scarves. Stop tipping out in the snow trying to be cute. Unless you live in a warm weather state, you have zero excuses. Spend the money on something to keep Old Man Winter off your hindparts. Pneumonia is not sexy.
2. Stay Lotioned Up - For some reason, people think the winter sun is less harsh than the summer sun. Same sun folks and you've got harsh winds and cold temperatures in the mix. Your skin needs moisture. Hydrate and lather up. There is nothing like seeing a gent remove his gloves and the hands are just ashy. Ladies, just because your feet are in boots and leggings is no excuse to let the maintenance go. Keep it supple, people.
3. Not keep a house like a freezer - I understand. The electric/gas companies are no joke. Bills have been known to (mysteriously) quadruple in the wintertime. I get it, folks don't want to give all the Christmas money City Utility Company. But ur, uh - I shouldn't feel like I'm meat on a hook stepping into your home. If you have folks coming over, suck it up and cut the heat on. At the VERY least, light a fire in the fireplace. Serve some spiked cocoa (mind out of the gutter, I mean the actual drink). I don't care if you pass out ceremonial Snuggies when folks walk in the door, make sure your guests can sit in your home without being tempted to light a bonfire on your living room table.
4. No chatting while shivering - Let me put this plainly: if you see me outside in winter,wait until I get inside to say hello. I hate when folks shout me out and we're standing there with swirling winds and snow flurries talking about how your grandma's surgery went. It's not that I don't want to talk, I don't want to freeze. Wave at me and meet me in the Starbucks. Please and thank you.
5. Keep germs where they belong - It's cold and flu season. May I recommend Airborne, Emergen-C or old school orange juice by the gallon? Get your immune system up. And if all of that fails... at the sign of the first hardcore sniffle/sore throat combo - stay your behinds at home. If you MUST venture out, plenty of Kleenex and isolation. Do not hack and cough all over town. Don't touch things (especially me). I'm that chick that catches whatever is going around and goes down for the count. It only takes one sneeze to spread a cold to everyone in a ten foot radius. Germs are personal, keep them to yourself.
6. Step your holiday game up - Today at my P.O. Box, dude behind the counter shouted me out, "Hey Michele. Happy Kwanzaa!" This is not a cool thing for non-African descendants to do. I was in a hurry so I kind of sent him a look and bounced. I've got nothing against Kwanzaa but why must I be shouting out Harambee just because I'm black? Don't make assumptions. Just say Happy Holidays and keep it moving.
7. Respect Snow - It's cold and wet. Not everybody likes it. Throw it at your own risk. That is all.
BougieLand? Have any winter rules to share? Thoughts, comments, insights on mine?