When you think about it, books and relationships have a lot in common. Some books you read once and throw away. Others you read, fall in love with and keep to read over and over again for years. Some books look great on the cover and have excellent liner notes, then you actually get a few pages in and are bitterly disappointed. Some books take forever to get to the good part but once you do, you're hooked.
Sometimes, you're only in the mood for a short story. Then there are the books that are bad from the start but you're determined to get your money's worth so you read it through to the end only to be irritated and disgusted that you wasted your time. Some books you should leave right there on the shelf. And who hasn't encountered a book that you read too quickly and have to go back and start all over again because you missed so much speeding through? See what I'm saying?
Noted book blogger @Reads4Pleasure gave me a list of five things she looks for in a good book. I'm going to make the argument that you can correlate these things with qualities to look for in a relationship as well. I might be doing too much but it kinda makes sense:
1) Well-Developed Storylines
Is there anything more irritating than being with a person who's all over the place? They have no direction, no clue where they are going and no idea how to get there. It's as if they wake up every morning saying, "Oh how did I get here?" A good book, like a good relationship, needs purpose and direction. Without it, you just have a bunch of words on a page that mean nothing. And though you may not have a clue where the book is leading you, you should really be interested enough to keep turning pages.
2) Fleshed-out Characters
"What is the hero/heroine's motivation?" Sounds cliché but it's soooo important. A leading character that is one-dimensional and bland spells doom for a storyline and a relationship. Shallow people both scare and bore me. I'm always wary of the character that's just a little too perfect. A fleshed out character isn't perfect, they have good and bad all jumbled together. Where's the fatal flaw? What's the thing that makes them human and will I be able to live with it? Characters that are just a little complex and multi-layered are the ones that hold your interest in the long run.
3) Unpredictable Plots
This is the equivalent of "not getting stale". There's a huge difference between crazy "I need bail money" drama and the wonder of a relationship that can still surprise you (in a good way) every now and then. Again, not in a "the stick turned blue" surprise kind of way but a pleasant, "honey I thought we'd pack up for the weekend and get outta here" kind of way. I can't stand books where the author clearly throws something in there for shock value. It's jarring and unsettling and takes forever to get back on track. But an interesting plot twist that makes you go "hmmm"? Well that's golden.
4) Descriptive Imagery
In a book, this is the ability to paint a visual picture so that the reader feels like they are living in the moment. They can taste the flavors, smell the fragrance and view the scenery. In a relationship, we call this inclusive creativity. It is the ability to create a great atmosphere and welcome your significant other into it... and make it inviting enough that they want to stay. Le Sigh. I'm getting wistful just thinking about it.
5) Fluid writing
Put in relationship terms, it simply has to make sense. Each portion of the story has to flow into the next in a sequence and cadence that works. You ever read a book that was full of disjointed flashbacks and timelines and you really couldn't figure out what happened when to who? You know how you have to flip back a few pages to re-read it and see if you missed something? Now think of a relationship where instead of going from A to B, you started at J went back to D and found yourself at Z before you could catch your breath. That's not fluid.
So what do you think? Did these analogies make any sense at all or did my allergy medication kick in? Did I miss a book-to-relationship analogy? How many times have you judged a book (relationship) by it's shiny cover (looks good at a glance) only to discover it was terribly written and painful to get through? Share your thoughts, the floor is yours...

59 comments:
I love it! What about books that never get to the point? You just read and read and finally give up. What's the point'? Just got out of a relationship like that,
Great, great analogy. I would add snappy dialogue - the best books (and relationships) have great communication.
I like. That's all I've got without caffeine. The nerve of you to be all intelligent and make me think today. lol
Okay, you're preaching a little bit today. I see you.
And I have been suckered in by many a trashy novel, read quickly and easily disposed of. Only hold your attention for as long as you're reading it. Steamy, hot but ultimately forgettable.
Yep. Relationship equivalent of a Jackie Collins novel. Good while it lasts but in retrospect you're a little embarrassed to have read it.
Yeah, I've read Jackie Collins. Don't judge.
Mysteries - there's always a villain and you're never sure who dun it until the story is over. Suspense is great for a book, bad for a relationship.
I think this might be one of my favorite posts. You've made me wistful to read a good book. I haven't been letting myself read books for a while now except for special occasions. With most things I have very good self-control, but a good book will keep me up until the wee hours of the morning with the old.... just a couple more pages :-) As for relationships, ah well.
Dude, I am SO judging you. The only people that should read Jackie Collins are high school girls and suburban housewives.
Cool post. I'm a sucker for the happy ending.
Jackie Collins? Dude!
Sounds like a BougieTale in the making.
Applause, applause. I never would have tied the two together but this works. I'm totally guilty of judging a book by it's cover. I tend to go for the glossy pictures. Doesn't turn out great with books or guys.
And a great start. A book (and relationship) that grabs your attention from the first line!
I'm an avid reader and I like a book that gives me what I call "the feel good"- that warm fuzzy so glad I'm here feeling. Relationships should absolutely do the same thing.
I love this post.
Okay I'll admit, I read this earlier and had to think about it and come back.
How about a book that makes you think and realize something you didn't know before?
Th s/o should do that too.
Chele - we need a new category S.No.G. (So Not Gangsta) - HA!
I had an epic comment about this new street lit crap and the Pookies and Ray-Rays of the world but disqus destroyed it. Le Sigh.
Awww. A romantic!
We may have dated the same book. Just went round and round with no resolution in sight.
I'm told the three elements to a story are a beginning, a climax and an end. How to put this in BougieLand?
The cocoa needs to be on full boil.
Ruh-roh.
Great point. Witty banter and honest convo always win
My bad
*snickers* OK, it has been since high school that I read one of her books, she kinda got stuck on the Hollywood series.
Good one!
More like a TruTV Forensic Files :-)
Thank you Sarah
Yes!
Pretty is as pretty does?
Warm fuzzy is always good
Great point.
Apologies, but I see where you were going. Don't get me started on "street lit"
Duly noted.
What about books where the title is misleading or has nothing to do with the subject content? You know...those relationships where you think it's one thing, but later on after further reading/investigation, you realize that you've been duped. Hoodwinked. Bamboozled. Led astray.
We have a saying in my family called "falling in the hole". When a good book gets going, you know how reality fades away, and you are engrossed so deeply in the story you feel like you are right there in the action? I just "fell in the hole" reading a book called "World without end" by Ken Follett, the author of "Pillars of the Earth". I love Medieval history, and after I got to page 250, I did not come up for air until page 986. I saved the last 20 pages to finish with my coffee this morning. I don't understand people who don't read.
On Chele's recommendation, I'm reading the Alex Cross books by James Patterson. I'm hooked. Read four last week. Reading (like a good relationship) can just take you to a different (better place)
Plymouth Rock landed on you?
New t-shirt? "Cute don't last all day?"
Love this! Smartly written food for thought.
I love this post!! As an avid reader, I tend to be a classics girl (e.g., Austen, Shakespeare, Hurston). I think that great relationships, like great books, alter us in the most positive way. Both experiences invoke growth that wasn't imaginable prior to the experience but feels natural during the experience.
I'm a book-aholic so this post speaks to me! What I'm taking away from it is that you can't go wrong with the classic/traditional...
Nice post! Makes me want to get lost in another good story the way I'm getting lost in Mr. Wonderful. It's been a minute since I read something that pulled me in like that. It seem like all my people love StreetLit & I can't stand it! After some very bad hookups, I've been off books like some of my friends are off dating. Perhaps some of the Bougieland brethren would be willing to help me get back in the game by finishing this sentence
If you love Toni Morrison you will enjoy reading ...
...Bernice McFadden
Maryse Conde
very nice post. this was something i needed to read. i doubt that you read my blog but....
a good book will take you for a ride, leave you breathless, and keep you wanting more. sometimes a book will take a turn and make you wonder, but you keep going because you trust that the storyline and author have a surprise in store.
I love a good book! I'm definitely one of those who will stay up all night until I'm finished, even if I have to suffer from lack of sleep the next day.
How about a book that keeps you up the whole night? You can't put it down, it is calling your body. Now that is some hot cocoa for ya! Cue Eric's Benet "Hunger".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzJ1Tl8Ob4s.
Another gr8 piece; correlating good reading with hot cocoa.
Exactly my sentiment, I'm on overload on election stuff & was hoping for a light read today. Very bougie of you Chele:-)
"How many times have you judged a book (relationship) by it's shiny cover (looks good at a glance) only to discover it was terribly written and painful to get through?"...This was my last attempt at a relationship, and now I am on hiatus.
Yeah those hard backs with the great covers get me every time!
Ok.this.right.here.
I think this more describes my last encounter. I didn't even bother to investigate, a few chapters in I started seeing how this story would end, so I bailed. Wasn't going to sit around waiting for my phone to ring with some female on the other end telling me who she was. No thank you!
Just really getting into reading. I think I read more books this year than I have in my whole life! (Chele's book being one of them). I'm reading the entire bible right now. It's very interesting, but a hard read. The Old Testament is tough!
I love the analogy! Does it mean I'm not relationship worthy since I'll change genre's on you in a quick minute though? But regardless of genre, the books I love all have the qualities in your post. The book that makes me say "one more chapter" as my glasses are falling off my face cuz I'm so tired are the best.
What do you think it means if you're one of those who routinely skips to the end of the book? I refuse to do it. But my sister reads the end early without fail.
When I was growing up, I loved the way the Old Testament stories were portrayed in my picture bible. Don't laugh (that bible helped me learn enough to be Vacation Bible School Trivia Champ). It was almost like a long running comic book that totally brought the stories to life in words and pictures. I kept that version even after moving on to all my advanced study bibles and my ex read it as a 34-year-old and loved it.
*places a gold star on David's shirt*
Hey Coretta I can't laugh cause I loved those stories as well! And I think that children's bible definitely gave me some clarity and understanding. The "grown-up version" is something else! LOL
@ blackprofessor & Jason P
Thanks
I have been a reader ever since I could. Keep reading material with me at all times. A possible follow-up blog for the readers, et.al. in Bougieland...favorite books, authors and why...
Great parallel criteria for finding and keeping good relationship...will keep it in mind...;-)
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