Wednesday, October 27, 2010

I'm not in charge of your expectations - Thank you LeBron!

It's funny. I've been wanting to write a post for a while about how other people take their hopes and dreams for what they perceive your life should be and project it on to you... sometimes with relentless vigor. But I never thought LeBron James would be my inspiration to get it written. It is in by top 5 pet peeves when people share (in not-so-subtle ways) what they think about your world. For example:

"Oh you're not married?" Clearly not.

"No kids? You're so good with kids!" Thanks, I think.

"I always thought you and insert name here would get married." Solar beam side-eye.

"You didn't become an attorney, you would have been great at that!" No doubt but I left law school over 10 years ago. Maybe I'm great at what I do now?

"Crime thrillers are a really profitable genre, have you considered writing that instead?" Maybe someday, why do you ask?

"I thought you'd be taller/shorter, thinner/thicker, lighter/darker." Okay, but here I am.

"You should take a break from dating/date more often/date outside your race/do something completely different." You think so?

It goes on and on. But the great thing is - finally I realized. I can only be who I am. [Intro to Eric Benet's True to Myself plays in background] And I'm still figuring out exactly who that is. I simply cannot be my best me while juggling umpteenth many people's expectations of what they think I should be. Sounds exhausting. It IS exhausting. Been there, done that, got the ulcer at 24 years of age to prove it. 

I once heard Dick Gregory do a skit about bill collectors. He said the bill collectors would call, he would tell them he didn't have the money and so they would call back. He decided to try a new strategy; he just started telling them, "I'll get you a little something in the next thirty days." Thirty days passed and the bill collector called indignantly, "Mr. Gregory, what happened?" He replied, "What do you mean?" The bill collector said, "I expected to see a payment from you last month." He said, "Well I'm not in charge of your expectations."

Let the church say... Okay, moving on...

Recently, LeBron James has gone from being a media darling, beloved NBA player and one of the ten most popular personalities of all time to a man having to battle for his reputation. He dropped from number 7 most admired sports personalities to 92 (I think I read that right). Anyway, he went from being deified to vilified in the course of an off-season. For those that don't follow sports, Mr. James opted to get the hell out of Cleveland and jump to the Miami Heat to team up with Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh in his quest for a ring. I wasn't mad about it. People paper-chase and title-chase on the Paycheck Plantation regular. I've never stayed at a job because the people loved me there. I've often left a job because I had a better offer with better long-term possibilities.

But back to Bron: For a man who has generally only basked in the warm glow of adulation and approval, this has been a struggle for him. I don't necessarily feel sorry for a multi-millionaire who bounces a ball for a living. But I get it. He's come face to face with the fact that you can't please everybody all of the time. For those of us that haven't managed not to give a damn, it can sting a little.

This week, Nike debuted a commercial where LeBron keeps it all the way real. It so very much reminds me of when I decided to bolt Texas for California. And when I decided to leave full-time consulting to write. Of course, I didn't get paid millions for announcing my decision and ESPN gave not a damn. That's not the point. Just sayin' I wish I'd had this video to play (on repeat).

(FYI - At last viewing, NikeBasketball had blocked the video for distribution. FAIL! Anyway, click here to view if the video below is blocked.)



Love. It. Do you, Bron-Bron. By the way, me likey the not so subtle dig at Charles Barkley. Shout out to @tmcydame for bringing the video to my attention.

BougieLand, how you handle the expectations others have for you? Have you gotten to the point where you can tune them all out? What do you think of LeBron's ad? Don't we all have to get to the point where we brush the dirt off our shoulders and keep it pushing? Thoughts, comments, insights? You have the floor.

103 comments:

kimberly billups said...

I so agree with this post. Dang let the man live his life ! Nobody says anything when these men get traded in the quest for a championship. Who cares what Barkley says. If ever there was a person who didwhat he wanted it's him!

Brneyed1 said...

I saw this last night in a bar. So many people were like "Bron is on some bull****." But I loved it! I'm sitting there cheering silently to myself. At the end of the day, HE has to be happy with his decision. And apparently he is. GO BRON-BRON!

glamah@cococooks said...

Story or my life, and still people won't quit with their unsolicited advice and trying to fit me in their box. I always marched to my own beat and so far have no regrets. I'm not a sports fan at all but it is totally ironic that it takes a LeBron James to say it very well.

Sarah said...

Cool commercial. I know what your talking about. There are many changes going on in my little world. Everybody is a critic. I try to let it roll off. And you know, every once in a long while somebody says something that sparks an idea so I consider each comment for a second or two. Although the ones like 'you've never been married?' serve no useful purpose what so ever. If you come up with a good answer to that one let me know.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Hot diggity! I love the commercial (although Bron Bron was never my particular cup of tea, I certainly was not mad at the many looks he sported. Especially the construction worker. Goodness, never got that excited for a blue collar look :-D ) and love the conclusive "I'm not MJ, stop trying to make me be" scene at the end.

Only the Tall said...

At the beginning and end of each and everyday, you have to make sure that the choices you've made are yours because pointing fingers, playing that blame game just makes you look like a follower and that's dumb, that's really dumb. There you are doing what people expect you to do, feeling duped and miserable and they're out having a good time doing whatever they want. We've all been there, I love it now when people call me selfish because that means I'm doing what I want to do and not what they expect me to do. When it's all said and done, don't you want to look back on your life and be happy to have at least learn from your own successes and failures? Own it, your life.

blackprofessor said...

I love this video and the message in it! I lost a dear friend when I was 17 and it HURT but it showed me that we have no idea how long we will be on this earth so we must make the best of every day. Since then, I have tried to follow the mantra "Carpe diem" which means seize the day and try to accomplish every goal I can dream up.

Penny said...

I liked the video-thanks for posting the clip. Sometimes people truly don't mean any harm, other times, well, IMO, they ask you these questions to mask their disappointment with their own lives. Like you, I don't have children, and in all likelihood, will not have them. However, when I consider some of the things that my friends and relatives that do have children have had to contend with-well, I'd say I am better off without them. Same for marriage; I am not married. Not that I didn't want to be, but it didn't happen. But hey, I am also not on marriage number 3, and looking to get out my current marriage, and planning for marriage number 4.

Also, I think you have to consider the source of the comment. For example, if someone says they are surprised you are not married, and the comment comes from Pookie, who at age 45 has never managed to move out of his parents basement...well, you know what to do think about that comment.

To LeBron and others who are banging their heads against the wall, trying to make other folks happy, from the song "Garden Party."

"But it's all right now, I learned my lesson well.
You see, ya can't please everyone, so ya got to please yourself"

michaeldavis said...

As for as you're concerned - do you and be happy with you. Everybody deals with the expectation of others.

Not to throw the thread off-line, but as far as LeBron, not as many people seem to be mad that he left (other than maybe Cleveland fans and the owner whose franchise value took a MAJOR dip lol) I think people hated how he left with "the decision" press conference. Hopefully he grasps that. On an NBA level everybody was excited when Shaq went to the Lakers, there wasn't this kind of animosity. I think people hated how he left with "the decision" press conference. He took an L with a bad move right there; we all take Ls from time to time. On an NBA level everybody was excited when Shaq went to the Lakers, there wasn't this kind of animosity. The Heat have a shot a winning the title after Kobe retires and they break up the Celtics.

Gods_Man said...

How you handle the expectations others have for you?
Transparency has helped me manage the expectations of others. I have always been upfront and honest with people about my intentions and my background. Whenever someone tries to push their expectations on me I ask is any of that consistent with my behavior so far? Whenever I am talking with someone and they are complaining about another person I ask the same thing.

Have you gotten to the point where you can tune them all out?
No, I cannot tune them all out but I choose which ones I will address. The hardest ones to confront are the expectations from my parents. Luckily their expectations and ours are starting to line up again.

What do you think of LeBron's ad?
I love this ad and plan to add it to a list of recordings that I play to get my mind focused.

Don't we all have to get to the point where we brush the dirt off our shoulders and keep it pushing?
Yup. We have to get to a point where we own the goals that WE set for ourselves. We also have to accept both the rewards and consequences of those goals with the same excitement. It is YOUR life so be honest about what you want, what you are going to do and JUST DO IT.

NIKE you can make your check out to Gods_Man

Thanks for this one. I needed this before my morning foolishness... er meetings.

donell said...

"i cant tell you the secret to success. but the secret to failure is trying to please everybody" - bill cosby

"hi chuck." (sprinkled pink donut) ::flatlining here people!::

CaliGirlED said...

LOVED the video!!! Not a LeBron fan, but didn't understand the big deal because players have been leaving teams for years now. Although I don't like that either but it's the norm now, in basketball and football. Yeah the press conference was a bit much, didn't watch, but they had already started crucifying him before he did it.

I have learned, the HARD way, to categorize people in my life. Very few are in the category from which I care about what they think. But this came with A LOT of pain. Bob Marley once said, "Truth is, everyone is going to hurt you, you just have to find the ones that are worth suffering for."

But I haven't totally arrived at the "I don't give a damn" point...Having just moved to Texas a year ago, I had a couple of people befriend me, who I came to realize didn't fit into the Friend Category that I have defined for myself. Both for different reasons. And not wanting to repeat the same mistakes and being "stuck" in "lifelong" friendships just because, I decided to distance myself from them so that the "friend" title would fade away. (Not good at break ups of any kind). Within the last two weeks, I agonized over going to two different functions, invited by these two friends, that I really didn't want to go to. But I eventually decided not to go, because the truth was, I REALLY didn't want to. Of course I felt guilty about not going, cause I do still care about people's expectations, but I felt that it was more important not to force myself to be somewhere I didn't want to be...I don't ever want to not give a damn, but I sure would like to get to the place where I don't agonize over deciding not to put myself in places where I don't want to be.

michaeldavis said...

come on Penny you know Pookie is just waiting for the right time to move. he was just looking at apartments last week.

William Martin said...

This post has me pumped up! I'm not to the point where I can tune out all of the "Will why don't you yada" but I'm working on it.

Leon X said...

I stopped caring about people's expectations about me a long time ago. If you are so concerned about what I should/shouldn't be doing perhaps it's because you didn't have the chance to do it yourself.

One of the questions I'm surprised you didn't post is "Why don't you write about __________?" For the record, I would never ask you to write about any particular topic. As I once read a blogger addressing that issue say if you want to talk about so-and-so topic, start your own blog.

As far a LeBron is concerned, no one is upset about "the decision." He brought the Heat (pun intended) upon himself by making the whole process into a circus. That commercial is just Nike's way of capitalizing off that story and sell shoes in the process.

BluAssassin said...

People fail to realize that all he wants to do is be the best in his field. Nobody puts all these unrealistic expectations on the CEOs of major corporations who have the same drive. It just so happens that his field of expertise is in the NBA. *shrug*

Everyone has the right to make their own choices without comments from the peanut gallery. I wish him well in his new city.

Earthangel172 said...

There you are doing what people expect you to do, feeling duped and miserable and they're out having a good time doing whatever they want.

^^^THIS!!! I agree with you 1000%.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

How you handle the expectations others have for you?

I'm still learning how to not allow the expectations of others run my life. It's hard (goody-two shoes uber responsible older sibling/eldest girl borderline type a personality) due to a lot of things, but I finally realized that twisting myself into all sorts of contortions just to make others happy was a losing proposition. Especially because the effort was never reciprocated and you will ALWAYS here 'why did you do that? ... I never asked/made you do [insert x]... "etc etc and so forth

Have you gotten to the point where you can tune them all out?

Not yet, but I'm that much closer, to paraphrase Wanda Sykes, to just not giving a [Foxtrot]

Don't we all have to get to the point where we brush the dirt off our shoulders and keep it pushing?

Yes. Or you will be bitter and miserable.

GrownAzzMan said...

If I could write I would have written this post. The funny thing about people's expectations is no matter what you do, they expected something else. That is why I agree with you and 'Bron. You just have to be true to yourself and say f*ck 'em if they don't get it. Wish I knew at 25 what I know now.

William Martin said...

Oh by the way, very cool how you took Bron-Bron billionaire blues and brought them down to everyday.

Earthangel172 said...

I stopped caring about people's expectations about me a long time ago. If you are so concerned about what I should/shouldn't be doing perhaps it's because you didn't have the chance to do it yourself.

#POW...LOL

GrownAzzMan said...

This ---> "Garden Party."

"But it's all right now, I learned my lesson well.
You see, ya can't please everyone, so ya got to please yourself"

I have always loved that song. Props for the reference.

OneChele said...

What you mean is, Big Mama gave him to the end of the month to get out cause she needs the space to host Pinochle night? ;-)

OneChele said...

And today's pulpit moment goes to blackprofessor. Pass the plate y'all.

OneChele said...

I had that "Why don't you write about __________?" line in here and took it out. Put it back in and took it out. Indicative of my frustrations when people want to say BnB is a relationship blog or a dating blog and want to know why I don't write more politics, sports, social commentary. It's a "this is how I feel and what I'm going through" blog and "y'all along for the ride" blog. But that doesn't fit into any comfortable niche.

Then again, I'm always open to suggestions about topic as it might spark my interest as well.
Le Shrug.

OneChele said...

you ---->right here<----me
I almost named this blog "Shiggity I wish I knew at 25" but it didn't fit well on the page

OneChele said...

Who sang/rapped that?

OneChele said...

It takes what it takes. At least you got there, some folks never do!

GrownAzzMan said...

Good for you Cali. Sometimes you have to be true to what YOU want to do.

Andrea M said...

You call it projection of expectations, I call it haterade.
"You hate me cuz you wanna be me"
Ignored and moving on.
Team LeBron

OneChele said...

That "Hi Chuck" line was a classic for the ages. The irony is - it's almost exactly the kind of thing Chuck would've said back in the day.

BrendaKay said...

As embarrassing as it is to admit this, it wasn't until my 52nd birthday this past July that I finally embraced being me. And it feels so good. :-)

OneChele said...

Exactly this. But it's always the former perpetrators that tend to fingerpoint.

OneChele said...

I most certainly will.

OneChele said...

Don't put Coco in the corner! ;-)

OneChele said...

For some reason, I never got that cocoasexy vibe from him that Jordan gave off back in the day but um - I surely did appreciate the aesthetic aspects of this commercial. Indeed.

OneChele said...

Thanks for these answers - good ones!

rocheejeffrey said...

Worrying about the expectations of others is paralyzing. You can't please everyone. There is no sense in worrying about what others have to say or think when you are the one who has to wake up and deal with the consequences of your decisions. It is your life. Live it well. Live it on your terms. Cause when you are dead and gone, you are going to be the only one in the grave.

Penny said...

Yeah-times are hard, and since Pookie wasn't paying any rent, and Big Mama gon' get a cut of the pinochle pot, like LaBron, ya gotta do whatch gotta do.

GrownAzzMan said...

"I think that you already know what I think about your thoughts." -- Ari Gold

Jesse said...

Life is too short not to live as you'd like. As long as you aren't hurting anybody else, live it up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koVHN6eO4Xg

GrownAzzMan said...

"Team Bron ALL DAY. What? If someone wants to pay me a million dollars to go on TV and announce that I quit this b*tch, Imma take it. At least he used the $$$$ for good instead of buying new ice."

That right there is why you gotta love Riley!

thinklikeRiley said...

Now ya ALREADY knowin' I don't give a F!
Hate me or love me, make ya mind up.
Team Bron ALL DAY. What? If someone wants to pay me a million dollars to go on TV and announce that I quit this b*tch, Imma take it. At least he used the $$$$ for good instead of buying new ice.
ESPN was straight robbing ad dollars for that sideshow.
Check the avi, check the name: THINK LIKE RILEY - get yours, I'm fo sho gettin' mine

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oz_-VaTHpc8

OneChele said...

Poor Ari had a rough season, didn't he? Talk about chickens come home to roost!

Crystal said...

Damned if you do and damned if you don't so you may as well do you, that has been my mantra lately and to just be the best me I can be. I loved the video, and personally I really did not get the big deal with LeBron changing teams. Aren't there bigger issues in the world and our own lives than to be mad at a man who has to decide which multi-million dollar contract to take. Don't players do that all the time anyway? But then again I am not a sports fan, at all so c'est la vie.

Page Bartlett said...

LOVE THIS AD! And this post is feeding my soul today. So many people tend to tug at you sometimes you need to shut them all down.

MariSol said...

Nas?

Joy Andrews said...

Let me get the shallow stuff out of the way - LeBron is fine. Mighty, mighty fine. If he's really sad, I'll be more than happy to soothe his feelings or whatever may hurt. LeBron looks like he can stir the cocoa well.

Okay, now that I have wiped the drool away - how many people told me not to become a dancer? How many people are still trying to tell me how (where, when) to live?

So to answer your questions - I handle their expectations by ignoring them. I can't tune them all out but 98.5%. Love LeBron's ad.

Umm-hmm, I'm going with Mariah's Shake it Off
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZVdDl_asYY

MariSol said...

We did know you gave nary an eff. Riley does Riley :-)

MariSol said...

*nods empathically*

Icey1273 said...

The best advice one of my good girl friends ever gave to me was: "Until you stop worrying about what others think you will never be free" Truer words man truer words

LikeLena said...

LMAO!!! I would still have come to read it :-)

CorettaJG said...

My expectations for myself are pretty high already so I'm selective about the opinions of other learned counsel that I take to heart. There is something to be said for constructive feedback but I'll consider what my inner circle has to say and "eat the meat and spit out the bones" on the stuff I get from others.

I didn't like the whole Decision special on ESPN, but didn't fault LeBron for moving. I have to give it to him for the "Hi Chuck" part of the commercial though. Well played.

Steve said...

Damn girl - is it kissing ass to tell you that you're on a whole other level lately?
Anyway, I can only do me.
Love the Dick Gregory joke.

David Chase said...

I simply cannot be my best me while juggling umpteenth many people's expectations of what they think I should be. AMEN and AMEN.

Jasmin said...

Side note: I love this blog, read it everyday, and wish I commented more, but I'm in my last semester, and I know Bougieland can understand the undergrad hustle. :-)

Shout out to my long-lost twin (Just a Thought) with this:

I'm still learning how to not allow the expectations of others run my life. It's hard (goody-two shoes uber responsible older sibling/eldest girl borderline type a personality) due to a lot of things"

Something about being the oldest grandkid (on my mom's side) and an overachiever to boot makes people want to put all their hopes and dreams on you. Thankfully, my parents aren't like that, but it gets annoying when people expect me to be Jesus for those lost sheep of the family flock. Still not as annoying as former "friends" who wanted to live vicariuosly through my dating life, though.

Peace out, Bougieland.

sunt97 said...

You got let things roll off your back. As I get annoyed too when people ask, "have you found a job" "are you married", "are you engaged". Live your life for yourself, but people can not like how you have gotten where you are. My mother doesn't like the fact I have children and I am not married. As for Lebron whatever. I am sure as long as the paychecks are deposited he can careless about what we really think of him. Yes he wants to be liked but I doubt if he losing sleep over it. As an Akronite (not Clevelander) most of us are over it and wish him luck (not, I will be cheering for Cleveland).

Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany

KG said...

Amen and Amen! Powerful stuff right here.

I'm definitely feeling the part about expectations from parents. The emotional connection with them just messes ish up and you have to go that extra step to figure out which is true practical advice (some based on their past experiences) and which is just plain emotional manipulation. I've learned to shut out the noise though. It was becoming quite a racket....lol.

I generally tend not not to care about the expectations ish from other people because they don't know where I'm coming from nor where I'm going. That being said, the difficulty of tuning out people is highly dependent on how deep the connection is between the people. The deeper the relationship is the more difficult it is. It's harder to tell my brother to eff off than some stranger down on ABC street.

KG said...

Re: LeBron, I agree. The whole dragged out affair was kinda unnecessary but nobody should hate on the brotha for making the move. It's called being smart and strategic. Will the move pay off? Only time will tell. I'm sure everyone's waiting to see how it all pans out.

Leon X said...

Now that you mentioned it, I realized I should have written "Why aren't you writing about __________?" It's great to take suggestions from the field, it's another story to have people expecting you to write about something in particular. I stand corrected.

baileyqc said...

Chele - this is some excellent writing here. I want to learn not to listen but I'm a people-pleaser. I haven't learned where to draw the boundaries yet. But I'm working on it because as you stated - it's exhausting to try and be everything for everybody else.

CaliGirlED said...

I actually thought that part was a shout out to Chuck cause he was adamant about not being a role model. Then after reading the comments I realized that I apparently missed something Chuck said...Ok Chuck don't go gettin all hypocritical on the young brotha!

CaliGirlED said...

They say 50ish is about when that really settles in. I can't wait!

CaliGirlED said...

"Cause when you are dead and gone, you are going to be the only one in the grave." Well said!

CaliGirlED said...

Exactly!!!

rozb said...

People love to tell you what they think you should do with your life, money, love, and career, as if they had the Golden Ticket to all the answers. For some of us, life isn't that cut and dry, and my timeline ain't your timeline. It's like when one of my military friends was confronted by an older relative at a wedding reception and was asked "Why haven't you gotten married yet? When are you gonna think about it?" With a straight face, she said "I'll think about it as soon as you consider waxing your upper lip." Granted, Asti Spumante had something to do with it, but it made it memorable just the same. BTW - the older lady did NOT like someone telling her what to do with her lady 'stache, so she might think twice about asking such a ri-damn-diculous question. Just sayin'...

datdudeincali said...

Not Asti Spumante?! <-- Liquor FAIL

OneChele said...

Yes ma'am - get your paper girlie. BougieLand don't cut no checks. ;-)
(Yeah I said don't cut no)

datdudeincali said...

It is kissing ass just a little bit Steve but ah - you been trying to get close to her nether regions for a while now.
#NoShade?

datdudeincali said...

An instant classic.

datdudeincali said...

You make up the best words - cocoasexy?

rozb said...

So you can see what kind of wedding and reception this was - it would not have been far-fetched finding squeeze bottles of gin at this event. My friend apologized for several days. I was entertained and in awe at the same time - the military brings all kinds of folks together. But it just goes to show that no one should ever feel that they are in a position to tell you how to live, where to do it, and when to make your moves.

I'm not a huge basketball fan, but LeBron made the decisions best for him and his, and nobody else. SMH at folks who got enraged at him for doing what most of us do in our everyday lives - jockeying for the best position possible to get the most from your resources and talent.

derek love said...

Shots FIRED!

derek love said...

Nothing like a little T.I. (even if he doesn't take his own damn song's advice)

rozb said...

You should do a post about it. I am sure you would get record visit numbers!

Paul on Ice said...

DatDude came out blastin'!

Paul on Ice said...

Love this ad, hadn't seen it but nice the way you rolled it into a bigger picture. Can't be everything to everybody. Well said.

Tonda Williams said...

You are about 10 shades of wrong for blastin a brotha, but FUN.TAY!

jake said...

Just thinking the same thing, and then he's gonna try and clean it up with #NoShade?
Much shade.

OneChele said...

I did one post called Things They Don't Tell You When You're 25: http://www.blacknbougie.com/2009/08/things-they-dont-tell-you-when-youre-25.html

Tonda Williams said...

LOVE THE AD and your post, Chele....

I just launched the "Work on Me" Project! 100% for me, by me & starring.. yep, yep "ME". Everyone but especially my "New Dude" wrecked my reserve nerve insisting that the entire world should resolve around his 3 year old actin azz, therefore he is now (END) aka Ex New Dude....while I'm on "MEcation"...

MochaMuffin said...

Oh, you too? Just sent my "New Dude" packing because life is too short for the game playing!
I'm pledging Me Phi Me for a while.

Javalicious said...

Dayum - son!

Javalicious said...

Stealin' it and LBJ has always been cocoasexy to me. Yum.

I Am Me said...

Did you say nether regions in BougieLand?! BWAHAHA.

I Am Me said...

This ad is the best at 1) Promoting Nike 2) Making LeBron seem human and less of a ring-chasing money hoarder 3) poking fun at the public for their perceptions 4) reminding us that Charles Barkley is a donut eating fat guy
It wins all the way around.

maureen palmer said...

This ad made WashingtonPost today and people went in on Lebron. Leave it to Chele to put it into context, thank you. I have to say I have gone throught the same thing with some family members. Since I'm not good with words and not confrontational, I avoided them like a plague. What hurts most is when people who know you very well go in like they are stranger to your situation. No Ma'am can't.

William Martin said...

Ruh-roh.

OneChele said...

Hold up yo! Why are we discussing my nether regions in BougieLand? All of ya GO. SIT. DOWN.

JaymeC said...

*Snickering behind hand* He-he-he! *points at Chele and leaves*

maureen palmer said...

Here is what killed with some of commentary after the announcement; If the team felt the need to cut him, they would do that in a blink of an eye. Folk should understand at the end of the day it is all about BUSINESS.
I worked for a guy who told me, if a car ran me down on my way to work, his business will continue running.

Tonda Williams said...

LOVE it...... We should plan a "Me Phi Me Escape". I'm actually VERY pleased with my plans and execution to date. I've found the PERFECT Naturopathic Physician (spent 4 hours with her yesterday on Phase 1, Stage 1) and got the 2 people that know me best to sign on as my emotional, physical & psychological sponsors....

Foxy Brown said...

i'm a black, lesbian, minister. if i paid attention to others thoughts, opinions, and expectations of me, i would be in a closet (literal and figurative) in the fetal position crying. i have neither the time nor the energy for other folks. the cross i carry is heavy enough.

Tonda Williams said...

Jake-He didn't just throw "Much Shade" he backed a truck up and off loaded a fully grown, oak tree.......*smh*

Tonda Williams said...

THIS.RIGHT.HERE

GammasWorld said...

Love love love the ad ... go on Nike wit yo bad azz marketing self.

ASmith said...

Ugh. Now I'ma have to like Lebron... cause he (and Nike) did that.

Anyway... I don't with ridiculous expectations. Half the time I'll not meet them, when I know I can, just because they're THAT ridiculous.

At the same time, I know that expectations can motivate folks. They can really push people to their potentials. Those people tend to be children, so this works out.

sugahoneyicedtea said...

Lil miss new lurker but *let the church say amen, passes offering plate* Sometimes I just wanna slap the suggestions outta people.

sugahoneyicedtea said...

*sorry I didn't mean pass the offering for me..I'm talmbout for Mz Chele & her fierce blog post

OneChele said...

Welcome!

MotownMs said...

...I understand folks giving 'Bron shade about the "circus" but know that the interviewer Jim Gray told Dan Patrick that he pitched the 1-hr "Decision" special idea and structure of the show to 'Bron's marketing guy Mav Carter & agent Ari Emanuel during game 2 of the NBA Finals...'Bron may have used poor judgement in accepting the idea but let's remember to spread the oscillating s- - - fan around for all involved to receive...jes sayin'...

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/danpatrick/blog/119161/index.html

Leon X said...

True indeed, but as you said he accepted the idea to do it. Also Jim Gray had nothing to do with that celebration thing they threw in Miami once they all signed. To do something like that before they won anything wasn't bright either.

FlirtyNerd said...

In the immortal words of Wesley Snipes's character (Miss Noxema Jackson) on Too Wong Foo (one of my favorite movies ever!), "Your approval is neither desired nor required".

I did that whole horse and pony show of living my life according to other people's perceptions and ideas about me, but a few years (and a few bald spots) later, I decided that living for ME is the best thing I could ever do. Who knows me better than me (besides God?). So why put so much energy into people whose perceptions are flawed anyway?

No thanks. Loved the commercial!

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