Sunday, August 29, 2010

How @IdrisElba almost ruined my relationship and a review of Takers


(Blogger's note: If you never watched The Wire, you won't take half the references in the post. Don't worry about it, it still makes sense.)

Let me start out by saying it wasn't my fault. Okay, I know that sounds like the cry of the guilty but let me explain...

At some point last Thursday I was shocked and dismayed to find out that New Dude (Derrick) had never watched The Wire, arguably the best series to never win an Emmy or get its due. I sat there with my mouth open giving him the BetaMax "they still make you?" look. He said he had meant to start watching but by the time he got to it, it was mid-season 2 and he didn't get it.

I cut him some slack. Season 2 was the weakest of the five in my opinion and if you didn't see Season 1 you don't get why McNulty is on a boat, Kima's on a desk and Daniels is in inventory. You don't get Stringer's power plays. We decided to go get the box set and watch. Then we figured out we could go to Amazon Video On Demand, buy the set and download the entire series to a TiVo or PC immediately. Score. 

I created a monster. I watched two episodes with him Thursday night. By the time I got there Friday, he had watched seven more. We finished Season 1 and I made it through about three episodes of Season 2 before I gave up. Saturday most of Season 2 and a start on Season 3. He was hooked.

At some point he says, "What is the deal with the Stringer Bell dude? I don't see what you see. He doesn't seem that handsome." I'm not stupid, I know my lines. "It's not his looks, he has an aura about him. Gives off a certain something." <~ See what I did right there?

"So all this Idris love is because he gives off a certain something, hmm?"

I shrugged.

"He certainly fits your profile."

That he does but I say nothing. Don't start none, won't be none.

Like dog to bone, he will not let the subject drop. "Do you only date tall chocolate dudes with athletic builds?" 

Le Sigh. Three ways to answer this. 1) Fire with fire: Do you only date light-skinned top heavy women? 2) Question with question: Why do you ask? or 3) Straight honesty: No. I went with number 3. 

"I've met two of your exes. You have to admit you have a preference."

"Everyone has preferences."

"So what happens when you meet a height-challenged light-skinned brother who sweeps you off your feet? Would you change up your preferences?"

"I'm not that worried about the packaging if I'm being treated well."

"Are you saying I'm not treating you well?"

Let's press pause. Here's what happens. Thirty hours straight of The Wire and folks start picking up Balto street mentality, conspiracy in waiting and Omar coming. Chris and Snoop on every corner. Or maybe he just felt like picking a fight? Then I remember that the SEW (Shady Ex-Wife) had cheated on him and maybe there are a few latent insecurities still lingering? I don't know where all of this came from but I was squashing it.

"When I'm not happy, don't I let you know?" 30-second stare-down before he shrugged and dropped it. 

Sunday we go see Takers. It's enjoyable. Guys will like the action, girls will like the eye candy. It's pretty up in that movie. A whole lotta gleaming teeth and twinkly eyes. Something for everybody. If the plot seems a little familiar.. it is. It's Armored meets The Italian Job meets The Score with a prettier cast. Matt Dillon has played this part several times since Crash. Broken down old cop with domestic issues. And there is definitely a point and time when you just have to suspend disbelief and enjoy. Realistic it is not. I was also so glad to see Marianne Jean-Baptiste (black woman from Without a Trace) in a small but pivotal well-done role. 


So there's this one scene when Idris' character is awakened in the middle of the night. He gets out of bed in some really tight 'leave nothing to the imagination' black cotton drawers and half of the theater gasped audibly. My heart may have stopped for half a beat. Goodness gracious. I got the laser beam side-eye and the whisper. "So he comes to your door like that and says, 'Let's go.' Do you go?" Brother Derrick loves to test folks. But I'm not so brand new. "You know what? I'm not the girl who keeps eating when she's already full." He nodded and went back to the movie. Made me want to hunt down SEW and kick her ass all of again. One of the most confident men I've ever met except when it comes to stuff like this. Thanks to her I can't let the drool fall out of my mouth. Le Damn.

Anyway, I gave it 3.5 out of 5 with heavy points for eye candy and things that go boom. Who watched The Wire? Who is going to see Takers? 

Oh - I'm on blog hiatus until after Labor Day. No fresh bouge this week. Speak amongst yourselves and I'll be back in September. Thoughts, comments, insights?

81 comments:

Aisha said...

loved the wire and takers is on the list thanks for the post today

Lynnette M. Evans said...

I was wondering why "Naomi" looked so familiar! I was a fan of Without a Trace but didn't make the connection. That boxer-brief scene had my girls and I gasping too...mmm. Oh, and I'm convinced Chris Brown is half ninja. That chase scene was a pure adrenaline rush.

keishabrown said...

1st: i too was late to coming to the wire (canada didnt get HBO). i ended up scouring the innanets til 3am watching episodes on my laptop.. and yes..season 2 sucked.
2nd: i was ALMOST worried reading the post title.
3rd: everyone has insecurities. as long as they dont take over and ACTUALLY ruin things, it's always nice to get reassurance. Since you've been able to date/be friends with real celebs, I dont blame him for being a lil insecure about your celeb crush on Mr. Elba.
4th: its funny that dudes have the swimsuit edition, king, maxim and video..um..models showcased left right and centre, and we're not supposed to take the ogling personally - but let us ladies swoon a lil over some chocolate and it's CNN crossfire worthy. PSA: eye candy is JUST that people EYE CANDY!!!
That's all I got. ;)

MeetCharlieL said...

Took a "lady friend" to friend to see Takers last night. She literally fell off the seat when your boy slid out of bed. Thank you Mr. Elba.
The Wire is the best television I've ever seen. Nothing compared before or stacked up since. I like Treme but we need one or two more compelling characters.
What's this about a hiatus? Did we vote on that?! LOL - enjoy your time. You always come back completely re-loaded.

Grace said...

Oh see, you handled it the right way. I would've said something snarky and made it 20x worse. Oh, and I saw Takers Friday - Lord Have Mercy. Amem. And Thank you Jesus.
I didn't watch the Wire when it was on but I kept hearing about it and borrowed my brother's box set and watched it over two weeks. Great TV. Very smartly written.

jake said...

Omar coming!
One of the best lines ever.

BlackestBerry said...

T.I. looking right in this movie too

Brendadc said...

I haven't seen "The Wire" either -- and yes, when I tell folks I get the "They still make you?" look too. I am trying to find someone with the DVD set so I can watch it. I saw "Takers" yesterday and I enjoyed it. Idris' bedroom scene had me shaking me head like "Lord, haver mercy!" He's the only reason I saw "Obsessed." It's funny how some guys love to talk about the female celebrities they admire but get defensive when women express their male picks. Oh well!

derek love said...

You manage to put Omar, Snoop and Chris into a relationship post. You iz bad! Going to see Takers next weekend. Here's a little Omar for ya.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueDjiAm5rzE

Andrea M said...

Is the scene with Idris all that? Cuz you're like the sixth person I heard mention it. Perhaps I need to squeeze in a movie this week.

bajanflchick said...

always have been a Stringer Bell fan ....saw Takers yesterday and was able to drool as much as I wanted...that Calvin Klein black boxer brief scene was the BEST in the movie .and I am looking forward to October when Idris's BBC series "Luther" comes to BBC USA TV...count me as an Idris Fan

Mr. Skyywalker said...

You're right, the plot was exactly as expected. No spoilers but Zoe was underutilized. And yes, the future Mrs. Skyy appreciated the crotch shot. *side-eye*

maureen palmer said...

I saw Takers on Friday, eye candy was on over drive. That T.I can wear a suit, lawd have mercy. I left the theater thinking I should call their mama's and say THANK you. That Jay Hernandez does something for me too.
I decided to go with the girls for these kind of movies. I once took S/O to go see "I am legend" and I let out shrill voices on that part Will was working out and the side eye I received was worse than being at the firing line at the congressional hearing.

GrownAzzMan said...

Never.Saw.The.Wire. Thanx for the review. I will have to find time to see Takers cause I loved The Score and I am a fan of all things that go boom.
So I guess this Idris dude is this generations Denzel? Mr. Washington used to be dat dude who caused dissension in the ranks...LOL
No Bougie for a week, what will we do? Enjoy your vaca Chele.

Deb B said...

It is some crazy double standard that dudes can howl behind any ole thing and we're supposed to be cool with it but let our heart rate increase a beat or two due to decidedly premium specimens of manliness - it's a whole other story. You handled yours.
Just got the Wire a week ago, I'm in the middle of Season 3. It's wild.

Daree said...

Idris is not the one I was swooning over, but I enjoyed it too!

LikeLena said...

What they say is - He ain't all that. But if we say that we're hating. Bless their hearts.

LikeLena said...

I don't recall approving a bougie hiatus. What iz we gonna do?!

Kiki said...

Paul Walker held it down.

diamond life said...

"I'm not the girl who keeps eating when she's already full." <~~ Stealing it.
And I'm going to see the movie tomorrow.
Now I have to find the Wire. It's hard keeping up with your bougieness ;-)

sunt97 said...

I have never seen an episode of The Wire either. People always look at me like I am nuts when I tell them that. Hell I didn't watch The Sopranos either for that matter. I will probably go see Takers only because I know I won't be paying much attention to the plot and there won't be any point to go with some one who will want to discuss it. Oh yeah, I finally make my way back to Bougieland and you are going on vaca!!!!

Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany

Uglyblackjohn said...

I never saw The Wire (sorry Mills - RIP) and won't see Takers.
That is a lifestyle I want nothing else to do with.

Suebhoney1125 said...

I loved the wire haven't seen all the seasons though. but the seasons I have were really good. Tell New Dude we have learned not to get all "bent out of shape" over Beyonce or Janet Jackson so he is going to have to "ride with us" on Idris Elba. And yes he is right, he is not all that handsome in the classic sense but he certainly has an OVER ABUNDANCE of SEX APPEAL!!! I'm sorry, D but it seeps out of every pore... and the cherry on top...... the British accent! (ooh is it gettin warm in here?)
Enjoy your time off!

David Parrish, Jr.(Inkognegro) said...

so uh...I got beef.

but ima hold my peace and wait for more source material.

Link me to the post with the talkabout what SEW did to TNG's mojo, please?

rozb said...

All I know is I had to play it off when he jumped out of bed like that. I deserved an Oscar for the "ho-hum" look I maintained on my face - but in my head I was "DAY-UMMM!!!!" My S.O. was giving the side of my head the laser beam side eye...too funny!

chele said...

I have never seen The Wire. I loved Takers and Idris in them draws was definitely the money shot. **swoon**

GammasWorld said...

Upon first reading, all I got outta dis here is that there will be no fresh bouge until after Labor Day -- what the hell? I'm gonna get a cup of coffee ... I'll be back.

Penny said...

Major "Wire" fan. I do think it was the best show that has ever been on television. Excellent writing, as well as good acting. Unlike most television shows, it was very subtle-you had to patient and wait for things to unfold. You had to pay close attention to the show for minor mentions and characters that might not become important until later in the series.

Since you asked about Idris, remember the scene in the Wire where Stringer goes to visit D'Angelo's girlfriend, and she offers Stringer one of D'Angelo's shirts? My, my, my.

Refreshing to hear that even the most confident of men can have their own sets of insecurities, just as we girls do.

MidwestDominicana said...

Love, love, love the Wire!! Heyyyy yo!

MidwestDominicana said...

Ohhh girl...yes! "I'm an XL"....yass!

MidwestDominicana said...

Omar and Bubs were my favorite characters. Absolutely loved "The Wire"!!

MidwestDominicana said...

I know this is wayyyy off subject, but is anyone a fan of Dexter? Awesome show.

taut_7 said...

i was having this discussion the other day amongst mixed gender company. the guys (and i agree) feel like if idris elba was a regular dude walking down the street most women who are checking for him now wouldn't be. it's amazing what fame and money can do to a man's looks as far as women are concerned. if you tell me i'm lying i present lil wayne. if dude wasn't rich i doubt he would have pulled lauren london or any other of his baby mothers (except for toya, maybe). let me become famous today. i guarantee i would be getting checked on 10000% times more than i am now. not saying that i don't get checked for.

with that said i would never be jealous of any woman i deal with drooling over a dude on a tv or movie screen. i have entirely too much confidence for that. lol

rozb said...

I have watched Dexter since Day One! last season was crazy!

EvolvingElle said...

So, I never really got into "The Wire", either, but I knew who Idris Elba was. I LOVED "Takers", saw it yesterday, and yes, I think there was a collective sigh in the theater when I was there yesterday as well. I actually did my own review (http://bit.ly/czeH2A), which the more I think about it, I don't think I talked about the movie really....well, yes I did. In any event, enjoy your vacay, and I'm sure we'll chat next week!
Oh, and about New Dude-girl, he'll be fine. Yes, it is a little disheartening when you have to keep reassuring your man that he is enough. And kudos to you for being nice, 'cause I would have said something smart and made things a whole lot worse...

OneChele said...

I had to jump in here. True, fame and fortune do help some men. Cuz Lil Wayne is platinum plated troll. But er uh, Idris - is 6'2", 205, cut, chocolate with "that thing" - he could be on a street corner holding a bottle of OE and I'd have to look over and say - Pookie done got fine.
There is NO comparison b/n the Weezy, Yeezy, Jeezy bruhs and Idris. No sir.

Tea said...

"You know what? I'm not the girl who keeps eating when she's already full." #SheGotGame

AppleBerryMIA said...

LOL at "Platinum Plated Troll" - OMG!

AppleBerryMIA said...

Dexter fan here!

taut_7 said...

yeah he may be 6'2" and 205 but i know plenty of guys who's stats run those numbers and better (don't know about "that thing" though) and they still don't get checked for. regardless of how you want to spin it money means a lot. look at lebron. *shrug* then take me for instance. i might not be the best looking guy in the world but i hold my own. if you wanna talk stats. i'm cut, chocolate, 6'6" and 195. let me be in a movie tomorrow i promise i couldn't beat the woman off with a stick.

GrownAzzMan said...

"I'd have to look over and say - Pookie done got fine."...LOL! Only you Chele

FreeBlackMan said...

I generally can't with the movies and shows glorifying crime but the Wire was shown from all sides. I have no plans to see Takers.

mizjazzegirl said...

Everyone looked sexy in their suits except for Chris Brown.

OneChele said...

No doubt. A lot of it is "that thing". Some of that is exposure to a larger scale, some is the simple perception. Some is money. There's a quote from an old school movie Gentlemen Prefer Blondes: Don't you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You wouldn't marry a girl just because she's pretty, but my goodness, doesn't it help?

GammasWorld said...

Had to come back to Bougieland for some laughter ... gig is aggravating Gamma today with them cuttin off our radio stream and all (in bougie terms - LeBoo). Props on remembering where New Dude was coming from and handling appropriately.

I don't go to a lot of movies and since Gamma had to reduce that cable budget, I no longer have HBO so haven't seen The Wire either. But I know exactly who Idris is and for a chance to see him in those black drawers I might need to skip lunch a coupla days. But then I might wait for the DVD so I can pause and rewind as often as necessary.

Now I gotta go find me a CD somewhere ... I needs my music.

Joy Andrews said...

This argument goes around and around each generation. But for every "ladies want the baller" argument, I give the "fellas want a dime" meme. Le Sigh.

GammasWorld said...

Okay yea Lil Wayne did need the money to get some play but Idris, naw. Gamma saw a brother in Home Depot with similar physical build, complexion, and that swagger (the swagger aka - "that thing" is KEY). Based on the paint splattered all over his clothes Imma guess he was a painter ... DID NOT CARE -- Gamma likes what she likes but I'm not a cougar tho so I had to just enjoy the eye candy and roll on with my bird seed LOL.

Joy Andrews said...

Okay, I'm going to see the movie. Today, soon as I can.

GammasWorld said...

Plantinum plated troll? Stop just stop. LOL

Rob said...

Dudes just need to admit Idris is that dude right now. Take your woman to see him in his drawers and then take her home and handle that. I ain't mad about it.

beautifulcurare said...

Chris isn't "grown man" enough to wear a suit, at least not yet...

Steve said...

Yeah boy! Thanks Stringer.

JaymeC said...

LMAO - get a little cougar coffee Gamma!

beautifulcurare said...

Like, dude, lmao...my feelings are HURT! That you would compare IDRIS ELBA to Lil Wayne (who looks like a corroded foot) and LeBron (who looks like he's missing a chromosome)...I just can't understand...

Money may do it for some, but I need to be able to look at you and not vomit...that is a deal breaker...

rozb said...

Amen, Chele, amen. Suffice it to say, just as there may be a guy who is wealthy and doesn't have "It", there is a guy working at the shipyard that has "It" all over the place. I guess it is all in how you make "It" do what it do. Idris makes "It" work.

BTW - Li'l Wayne looks like one of those little razor-mouthed aliens from the movie Critters. Check for yourself. Got the mouth and everything. Just sayin'...

JaymeC said...

Wow - this is YESTERDAY'S post still on and popping? What ARE we gonna do for a week. You may have to throw us a bone on Wednesday. The natives will be right restless.
Anyway, I'm off an age where I have seen the Billy Dees, the Denzels, the Idris' all create a little stir.
Simply put - Women LOVE confident men. Call it swagger or that thing but it's the vibe that says "I got this. I'm holding it down. And if you wait a second, I'll come hold you down too." Money, fame, success all can help a man acquire that vibe. Some men just have it no matter what.
I believe I'll go with the girls to see this movie. I don't need the side-eye from Mr. C.

taut_7 said...

ok maybe those were two bad examples but you have to admit that it does add to the appeal of a man and at the very least makes him more accessible to ogled.

taut_7 said...

i know a lot of chicks that are feeling lebron. i doubt the millions in the bank don't hurt his cause.

taut_7 said...

hmmm. you know what the equivalent of man having money in a woman is to me? a woman having a personality. looks come a dime a dozen. especially where i'm from.

Reecie said...

Lil Wayne is a troll--but he was actually cuter in the hot boyz days before he started tatting up every vacant crevice of skin.

I don't think Idris is THAT hot. I'll admit it. I think I was attracted to his ROLE as Stringer Bell, and that character did it for me. Idris has THE SEXIEST accent--I'm an accent girl, but if he was a guy on the street I probably wouldn't do a double take unless I happened to hear him speaking. true story. Then I'd take everything else in, which isn't bad at all...just not like super foine, to me.

MidwestDominicana said...

Halle loo yer!

FormerLurker said...

I enjoyed to movie as well. I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE me some Idris, so the man and I went to see it on our anniversary. Like you said, something for everyone.

MotownMs said...

I have all seasons of The Wire and agree that it was one of the best written series minus season 2. Idris. Has. IT! Hands. Down. He did not have that kinda money when he started in The Wire and he was hot from jump...and for the record...I don't expect my man to like what I like in a man...jus' sayin'...;-)

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

I'm not an Idris stan and that scene made me gasp audibly. I mean, he moved up on my roster of celebs I wouldn't mind ... anywho, I greatly appreciated seeing him in his drawers. That, and that he's always come off as a Grown Azz Man. Gotta love that.

You're better than me, cuz I would have straight hit him with the "you only date light skinned women" line. But I have zero compassion for brothers that mention color in a negative or superficial way.

As for Takers, it was a great Saturday movie. I love that my eye candy Paul Walker had the role that he did, and I loved seeing all those handsome men in suits.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

I know! Dudes have all this stuff objectifying women, but we can't even express appreciation for a nice looking man.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Cosign. I would do unmentionable things to Paul Walker. TI killed all his sexy for me with that movie, and he had precious little to work with IMO.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

It's like a refreshing breeze on a hot and sticky summer day. It's brief, but memorable.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

And make sure not to see that Ben Affleck movie that coming out about the bank robbers. Not to say that your principles are inconsistent. I don't know you so my opinion matters very little. I just want to make sure that, even though there are complexities to the black experience that inform how we approach media and pop culture, that we aren't demonizing a black-produced film with less problematic elements than one would think when we wouldn't hold the standard for a mainstream film.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

Come on dude, Idris in everyday life will get plenty of attention. He is handsome, albeit not pretty. Dude isn't even my cup of tea (aside from height and build) and there is still something about him that catches my attention. Some call it swagger, some call it presence. He gives off sex appeal, grown azz man-ness, and just a whole bag of panty-melting goodness. His being a celebrity just let more women enjoy looking at him. I've got two former coworkers like Idris, and best believe if they weren't the moral and solid brothers that they are, they could have had a different woman every night of the week.

Just_A_Thought1218 said...

If you live where there's an AMC theater, then the weekday (M-Th) showings are cheaper.

Nadette@Eat, Read, Rant! said...

well I need to go see Takers, because I love action. and I love chocolate eye candy. put the two together, and new dude or not, drool will be falling. And I did get sucked into the wire during a free HBO cable run, back in grad school, but never finished watching all 5 seasons. i don't pay for extra channels, i have a poodle to feed and thigh high boots at Nordstrom calling my name. (priorities, son!). but one of these days, i'm gonna finish what I started with the wire, if only because I currently live in baltimore. (on the east side, in the gayborhood, miles and miles away from wire-ville!). But for serious, I wanna kick SEW's ass my damn self. Trick done messed up your game, forcing you to keep your Idris Lust to yourself for the sake of new dude. Damn...the things we do for men. I hope New Dude understands the sacrifices you've made for him.

rikyrah said...

never seen The Wire.

went to see Takers and had a lot of fun watching it.

bluassassin said...

Yeah, that scene with Idris in his boxer briefs was worth another ticket... LOL

Is it me or is it hot in here? *fans self*

Myas-mom said...

That's because in actuality, they are the weaker sex and they can't handle things like that. LOL

Myas-mom said...

Glad I'm not the only one who gave a side-eye to the hiatus. What IZ we gon do? LOL!!! Have a great one Chele!

Myas-mom said...

Denzel is still that dude, Idris is just added to the handful of men who have that effect. You know like Billy Dee Williams, Denzel is now at legendary status. LOL

Myas Mom said...

Chele you are like a gangster who kills someone then shows up at the mortuary and shoots them in their casket!!!

"Lil Wayne is platinum plated troll." and "Pookie done got fine." WTH are you trying to do to me? ROTF while LMAO!!!

Myas-mom said...

"I'm not the girl who keeps eating when she's already full." Wow! I am soooo stealing this one! I needed this one years ago. But that's ok I have it now!

taut_7 said...

ok so i watched this movie last night. i was bored out my mind. ti played the b*tch roll very well too.

Carey Jackson said...

*whispers* Hater.
LMAO! She did say the plot was thin.
But I liked it.

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