Hey Eldrick,
Rough year, huh? The ass-whipping, the rehab, the injuries, personal drama and whatnot. I want to sympathize, breaking up is hard to do and all but um – you SO brought this on yourself. Karma is a bee-yotch. An evil boomerang of a vindictive witch just waiting for you to stand up again so it can whack you in the head. But I guess you know that by now, huh? And you know, it was not just the pathological lying and cheating and the terrible sexting, whatever. Keep a penicillin shot and a non-disclosure agreement with you at all times, quote Barry White in your texts and if that fails you have the option to roll up on women and say "Just Do It" – I mean you kinda own Nike, right? These are just suggestions.
My main point is this: You brought this on yourself with the choice of spouse to begin with. You proposed to Peaches, not Paulina.
Okay so maybe Elin isn't the exact Caucasian equivalent of Peaches from around the way but she was close enough. You can call her a supermodel if you want to. Call me a Pulitzer Prize winner while you're at it. She wasn't and I'm not… yet. J That überNordic chick was a nanny. NTTAWWT (Not That There's Anything Wrong With That). It's an honest way to make a living. But when your net worth is over a billion dollars and you know you're a closet p!-hound you need to marry a real supermodel, someone hustlin' for their own dollars. You like those Eastern European types, that's why I mention a Paulina. I'm sure there's a 20-year old equivalent out there. Or maybe you've decided to go exotic this time around? Get you one of those Brazilian Bikini chicks if you don't wanna flow to the Iman/Naomi side of the spectrum.
The thing is when you marry the nanny; you end up with a nanny who has become accustomed to living like a billionaire's wife. Now your exploits get splashed all over every available media outlet and some judge wanting to make history gives your nanny/wife 750 million dollars. Seven hundred and fifty million. (Somewhere somebody just started head-boppin' to Get Money
). Homie, that's a sponsored come up for real tho. Monsieur Tigre, that is more than the country of Iceland needed to avoid bankruptcy last year. I added that not to be mean but just in case you needed some perspective… Iceland could get a loan from your nanny/wife.
Moving on...
). Homie, that's a sponsored come up for real tho. Monsieur Tigre, that is more than the country of Iceland needed to avoid bankruptcy last year. I added that not to be mean but just in case you needed some perspective… Iceland could get a loan from your nanny/wife.Moving on...
Let me plead with you right now…step your game up. Not your golf game; I'm sure that will be fine. Your relationship game, sir. I won't waste typing time telling you how many sisters would be honored to have you cheat on them and then set up their next five generations with wealth. No need for that. I'm just saying how about you snag somebody with their own dollars? Someone who brings a little more to the table than a blonde ponytail and adoring smile? I'm not knocking Elin, she clearly has enough on the ball to catch you, keep you and toss you back while retaining (let me type it again) $$750MM of your money.
And actually, might I suggest before you go looking for your Paulina that you work out whatever's going on with you? I don't know what kind of clinic you attended or where your head is but I have to assume you don't have another ¾ of a BILLION dollars to parcel out to the next one. If you don't plan to play by the rules, don't even bother with the marriage vows. Mayhaps a series of flings? Again here's hoping you choose some ladies that don't look like cheap wanna-be porn stars working the food court in a mall in Jersey? (No shade to Jersey… just sayin' the side pieces were a damn disgrace in more ways than one)
Well, good luck to you. Just wanted to share my thoughts. I'm positive you've been waiting for them with baited breath.
Keep it Pimpin',
OneChele
Have anything you'd like to say to Le Tigre? I'm sure my blog is on his morning reading list.
22 comments:
Amen!! I think the relationship conversation starts and stops with this point right here - some men choose the WRONG spouse as opposed to stepping up their relationship game to get with the RIGHT spouse. I don't know if it's due to laziness, fear, selfishness or an unwillingness to grow, but most men aren't prepared to deal with the consequences that follow a bad marital choice. Sadly, the only thing brothers will focus on from the Tiger situation is not getting caught cheating as opposed to not cheating or not choosing the nanny!
I believe I read somewhere that his marriage was part of his "brand", at that point I was done, this brother's ego is more than I can handle. It was reported Elin is getting $ 83M for each of his side chics womp womp. This is the great U.S.A you can marry whomever you want, with that said, some of these guys goes for women beneath them(i.e earning power, class etc)- maybe it's a controlling thing with them. You know what they say, you made you bed, lie on it.
Will let Nas finish it off: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3bANUSYOys
Tiger's situation just proved that ALL women, no matter color or creed, can turn into Inspector Gadget to get that info and bust a man. Even easier to bust a rich, stupid man.
Bravo, Chele, bravo.
Enough said. And I ain't mad @ Elin - she knew what she was doing ...
Dear Tiger: Bet you'll know next time ninja (stolen from RIchard Pryor).
-- SLS
Elin is my new personal hero. And I believe she has updated her theme song. Now playing on her iPod: "All I do is Win, Win, Win... no matter what" :-)
Excuse me sir -
How you give away HALF yo' bank over hoochies?
You stupid.
Good luck on the links,
JP
What he said.
Cosigned,
D. Love
Well let's face it, he really has not made himself a sympathetic figure, on any front.
He had mentioned something about taking some time off - I think he should do that.
3/4 of a billion dollars. That's all I have to hear.
LOL at Paulina Porizkova! Do you really think he's learned a single lesson?
It was an agreed settlement and not a judgment. I guess I don't really like the disparaging remarks people are making about Elin. It is the idea that a woman (or man for that matter) can be summed up by the job she does. Personally, I know nothing about this woman. Plenty of young woman come to the US to work as nannies because they want to travel. They work a few years and then go home. I don't really understand why it is assumed that simply because she was a nanny that she was in the relationship for the money. And plus there is the implication that somehow she is the one that was the problem in this relationship. I don't know what their relationship was like. Why is them being equals based on their respective jobs? It seems like a hazardous situation in any relation to base the relative power or equality on salary of the members of the couple. Anyway, it is really neither here nor there to me. My life goes on in its quiet little fashion regardless of what the rich and powerful do. I do hope Tiger wins some golf tournaments, though, since it brings excitement to the game.
It's amazing to me how someone who was so disciplined on the golf course could be so undisciplined off of it.
And his game is kinda sucky this year too......."Man, youse in trouble for sure".........
This guy will never marry again and if he does he will have an ironclad pre-nup that that will not allow her to get one red cent. In fact maybe Tiger should do commericlas for pre-nup, hell right a book out how not to cheat on your wife, he could write a for dummy book. But then again he may have to pay royalties on that. I guess he should just stick to what he knows best---getting the mud ducks from the bars.
Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany
Dear Tigre,
That's what you get.
~Grace
Chele, you know dang well if this was in reverse and Elin was caught cheating and Tiger smashed in her face with his golf club, you would roast his behind with the quickness. But anyways, he should've gone to the whorehouse instead of the chapel if he wanted so much tang for free, lol. Oh well. Such is life.
this really confused me, I thought you were gonna say something about Christina Aguilera's new song which features PEACHES and was written by LE TIGRE....
http://www.youngcreature.net/2010/05/christina-aguilera-le-tigre-and-peaches.html
lol
He can't go a super accomplished woman, she would've been checking those texts messages years ago.
This made my day.
I thought this was hilarious.
he married without a PRE-NUP.
idiot.
They had a prenup; she renegotiated. He followed the example of his childhood when it came to choosing a wife - no offense to his mother - and bet that Gloria Allred won't be on the Christmas card list!!
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