Friday, May 14, 2010

Wrapping up Questions for the Ladies Week: Worst of the rest

Usually, I would do the "Best of Rest" to wrap up Questions for the Ladies Week but some of the questions sent in were so very terrible that I had to share the worst. And these are bad. No offense to the guys that sent these in. I suspect that you are going through some things with your current S.O. and I apologize on behalf of all womanhood for that. Without further ado… here are the worst of the rest.

  1. What does it mean when a woman goes silent?
  2. What is the best pick up line you ever heard?
  3. If I say I love you and you don't say it back, what does that mean?
  4. What attracts you to that "bad boy" type?
  5. What is the best way to approach a woman about having a threesome? Or some other sex act she may not normally perform?
  6. Can you just fall back and let me be the man, please?

We touched on these on the radio show Wednesday night. If you missed the show, check it out. But here's the basic consensus of what we said:

Answer 1 ~ It means something is very, very wrong. When a woman can't even be bothered to put the words together to tell you how ticked off she is… that's bad.

Answer 2 ~ We don't like lines. Smile, walk over and introduce yourself. That works. Tell us we're pretty (in a good way not a 'hope to see you naked' way)

Answer 3 ~ Could mean many things. Could mean I don't love you back. Could mean I don't love you yet. What's the context? When are you saying it? How long have you known the person you are saying it to?

Answer 4 ~ I'll have to defer to someone else. I tried dating a bad boy once for prom (after my original date back out one week earlier). It was exciting right until the moment he pulled my mother's car up in front of a crackhouse to pick up some money for dinner. Um, yeah – he's still in jail. No more bad boys for me. Now if you're talking about men with confidence

Answer 5 ~ O__o <~~That's a side-eye. Seriously? Know who you got. If you have a woman open to that sort of thing, you already knowing. If you don't… you know that too.

Answer 6 ~ This is my favorite terrible question of the week. I have to assume that the person who sent this in is having a helluva time with the woman in his life. The easy answer is yes. The next answer is – many of us are dying for you to step up and be the man. The complex answer is actually a question – when you say "be the man" what exactly does it mean? Again, we need more context.

BougieLand – thanks for your input this week. Any comments, answers, thoughts or prayers about these raggedy questions and the week on the whole? The floor is yours.


diamond life said...

I know we are supposed to say there are no such things as stupid questions but um... Yep - these are bad. Like "if you have to ask..." bad.

Liselle said...

Imma go head and call bullshiggity on the fellas this week. They talked up a game when it was our week about how they were really gonna come with it and would we be upfront... see how they do?

brendakay50 said...

OneChele ~ I just have to ask, was it Riley who submitted question 5?

Stank_0 said...

Now see I gotta step in and rep for the menfolk. There's a problem in asking question about women in general. No two of ya'll do anything alike. At all. EVER. So to ask a universal question is kinda pointless.

It is not that complicated asking a question of men in general, but we are remarkably simplistic and similar.

For every woman that won't "let me be the man," there's two on here talkin about that ain't me. That leaves unbelievably general and boring questions to ask which most of us already know the answer to.


JaymeC said...

Answer 1 - When I get silent I am so through with you, I don't what to say. And I talk for a living.

Answer 2 - No lines, just honest interest.

Answer 3 - Women are so in love with love, if she doesn't say she loves you back she probably doesn't

Answer 4 - Bad boys are supposedly sexy, element of swagger, confidence and danger. Not for me thanks.

Answer 5 - What you are REALLY asking is how can you talk a woman into it. Either she will or she won't.

Answer 6 - No one should have to LET you be the man. You are biologically that. If you want to own the "traditional role" in a relationship, state it, claim it and act like it.

Man's World said...

Might not be the best questions ever asked but I loved this week. Because it was additional dialogue. Someone, I think it was Derek, said men whould study women and how they respond to things. This week was a great example of that for me. So thanks for putting up with the good, the bad and the ugly.

Joy Andrews said...

I wonder if this means that men know more about women (ha!) or that women just ask more varied questions?

Steve said...

I would say that if you ask 20 women the same question, you would get 15 different answers. If you ask 20 men the same question, you would get 2 answers. And brief answers at that.

Sasha Stiletto said...

Which MEANS that women allow themselves a diversity of thought... this is a good thing - no? If we only had one answer, say something like "Hell no" that we responded to everything with - that wouldn't work out so well for you.

Steve said...

That is some female logic for you.

Pure Choco said...

I love it when someone already has a great answer. Then I can co-sign as if I would have said it this well. ;-D

thinklikeRiley said...

Naw son! I already know the answer - yes and when. Who wants in?

Leon X said...

I thought the point of this week was that the women were to provide insight on the questions men ask just like men provided insight on the questions women asked. Was it not?

Leon X said...

I'll go in on number 5. A threesome is the lazy man's sexual fantasy. It's the most overrated in terms of sexual fantasies. If you think a threesome is outside the sexual box (no pun intended) then you've just left one box and found yourself in an even bigger box.

Sarah said...

I didn't get a chance to listen to your radio show, but I'm looking forward to listening some time this weekend. I haven't commented this week because the questions reminded me of those asked as a precursor to an argument or a fight. I haven't the energy for arguments these days. I did have a few general thoughts, though. I think there is an absence of patience and an indication that others are viewed as a means to an end in one's story rather than distinct individuals with their own story. If you really want to understand somebody whether it is your significant other, a family member, a friend, or a co-worker, you have to take the time to listen and observe and interact with them. There is no shortcut. We live in a NOW society (and I don't mean National Organization for Women). Everybody is busy and wants to fit more into a day than possible. One result is nation of the sleep-deprived and another is wanting relationships with other people without the work. There are many different sayings that amount to the same thing: the joy is in the process not necessarily the end. I think it is entirely possible if you slow down, pay attention, keep an open mind, and respect that others live their own stories that all the relationship you have will be better and you will find more enjoyment in them along the way.

Page Bartlett said...

I love Jayme. She always say the perfect thing.

GrownAzzMan said...

I think the reason women asked more (better) questions then men did is because they believe that something can be learned about men in general. I get asked often by female friends online and off if I can explain men. Since I quit going to the meetings...LOL all I can really offer is what I think on any particular situation or scenario. My approach is the same for women. I am only interested in what THE woman thinks about anything and when I want to know I ask HER. Thus my limited (read no) participation in Questions For The Ladies Week. No offense but y'all aint the ones I need answers from.

Have a great weekend!

Rob said...

Well I liked the week. You answered my lame question and thank you for not outing me on which lame question it was. Gave me some perspective and a different way to approach something.

Rob said...


AppleBerryMIA said...

Unfortunately, I think men believe they know it all already and they really, really don't. Instead of taking this opportunity to gain so real insight - they kind of punted. IMHO

sunt97 said...

It means take cover because either I am thinking of how to react appropriately or how long it would take to rip your ears off your head.
I have yet to hear a good one yet. Usually I laugh and say is that the best you have.
It may be unrequited or that she is thinking you have something big to tell her and you are trying to soften the blow.
We love the energy and the excitement which can fade and become annoying after some time.
It's not exactly the convo you want to bring up at dinner. If your girl is a freak then she may be open to that, but if she cringes at the idea o most things in the bedroom, rest assure the answer will be no and you may be sleeping alone.
I love to let the man be the man and I also let him know that I can take care of me, so he can rest assure and maybe even like that part about me.

Peace, Love and Chocolate

WriterChanelle said...

A lot of men feel that way. Unfortunately, it doesn't help us learn anything about each other before we become THE one. It takes growth and development to get to that stage. Communication between genders helps.

KG said...



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