Thursday, May 06, 2010

In Defense of Professional Athletes with a look at “Just Wright”

So… speaking of professional male athletes: there are approximately 462 NBA players, 1760 NFL Players, 800 MLB players and 720 Hockey dudes. I don't know from golf, soccer and boxing but let's just round up and say that in these here United States of America (and a few parts of Canada), there are approximately 5000 current professional athletes and who knows how many retired. To hear folks tell it, every last one of them is a megalomaniacal, wife-beating, gun-toting, sex fiend who can't save a penny, speak coherent sentences or look beyond their personal bling.

Before I get into my personal experiences, I have to point out that I've been amazed and unamused at the sweeping generalizations attached to that group. Maybe because as a single black female, I've seen that kind of random media bias and subsequent shade-throwing up close and personal these days? The caricature of the spoiled, rude, 12-baby-mama-with-all-the-drama rich boys is perpetuated because that's generally the story the media focuses on. (Don't get me started on Basketball Wives) It's sexier to talk about Plaxico Burress shooting himself, Ricky Williams smoking pot and Dwayne Wade's divorce than to talk about the 400+ foundations, charities and kids' camps currently attributed to professional athletes.

There is a movie coming out May 14th that I'm fairly excited about. It's "Just Wright" starring Queen Latifah and Common (rise of the rapping actors, FTW!). Official synopsis from Fox Searchlight: Leslie Wright (Queen Latifah) is a straight-shooting physical therapist who gets the gig of a lifetime working with NBA All-Star Scott McKnight (Common). All is going well until Leslie finds herself falling for Scott, forcing her to choose between the gig and the tug-of-war inside her heart. Oblivious to her romantic overtures, McKnight is instead drawn to the affections of Leslie's childhood friend Morgan (Paula Patton), who has her sights set on being an NBA trophy wife. Is Leslie destined to play the role of "best friend" forever or will Scott finally see that what he always wanted is right in front of him?

One of my least favorite reviewers (who shall remain nameless because I refuse to send traffic to his site) said he thought the movie was way too bland. He felt that the main characters have been stripped of personality and he couldn't buy Common's character because he "is the nicest, safest, NBA player in history. I mean c'mon a nice and considerate NBA player?? Here's an idea…what if the film had made him an arrogant, loud mouth, annoying person (with maybe a baby momma somewhere) to hide the fact that he's an insecure, lonely person afraid his glory years as a player have passed him by? You know a REAL person."

For real tho? Have you met any players… in like… REAL life? Or are you stereotyping based on what you've read? Glory days as a player? Most athletes have 3 – 5 years of a career (if they're lucky) and then they're done. 72% of those playing never reach star (let alone superstar) status. If you knew you could only do your job for three years and then you have to do something completely different… that might change your outlook.

I've had the interesting life experience of knowing, dating, and hanging around professional athletes for years. Being bougie in nature, I was never one to gawk or jock. I never have been nor ever will be any flavor of groupie. To me, they were just guys with high-profile jobs and more change jingling than others. Of course I've seen the good, the bad and ugly. But I've seen a lot more good than bad and ugly. There's something that happens when you start depositing checks with nine figures and have a microphone in your face morning, noon and night. It doesn't happen to the athlete, it happens to the people around them and then the athlete is forced to react. The dynamic gets strange when people begin to think you're important because of how you move/protect/deflect a ball. Not everybody reacts well to having long-lost cousins call you up for bail/house payment/random loan at 3:00 in the morning, having your mother steal your credit cards, having your housekeeper put your personal items on eBay behind your back, having random women whip out their breasts and say "sign these" – all of these are stories that I have witnessed personally. Now if you don't have a strong foundation and support system, all of that is going to do something to your head. As one athlete said, "We're grown-assed men playing little boy games. And that we get adored."

My point is - selfish jerks with problematic lives are everywhere. Some have money and high-profile jobs, others do not. If regular Joe has a bad day, two people hear about it. If Superbowl Joe has a bad day, it's YouTubed and leading on ESPN Sportscenter. I'm in no way excusing the bad behavior that we've seen exhibited by some athletes (and the women that chase them). I'm just going to say it's not easy. These guys work incredibly hard. Even the most naturally gifted athlete has to maintain his athleticism, learn the nuance of his position and deal with all the extra stuff that comes along with being a multi-millionaire before 40. I know, I know – boo-hoo, he makes $52 million and has to work for it. I'm just saying… your paycheck probably isn't published on the Internet. Your performance at work isn't witnessed by millions and presumably, no one spits on you and threatens to burn your house down if you make a mistake.

I've had the pleasure of being around athletes that were grounded, those that planned for the future, kept the drama at a minimum and had an idea of who they were when the lights weren't shining and the game is gone. So-called "good men" trying to do the right thing for themselves and their families. I've also been around those other cats and just stayed out of their way. The same way not all men cheat, not all professional athletes walk around with an inflated sense of self.

I've also had the interesting phenomenon of being judged because I dated professional athletes. As if there is only "a certain type of girl" with a "certain kind of look" and an agenda that spends time with those guys. I'm going to call bullshiggity on that whole thought process. I've literally met a guy, he finds out the name of a guy I used to date and all of a sudden he's looking at me in a different kind of way. Le Huge Sigh.

Long post short? Stop hatin' on athletes unless you know some that have done you wrong personally. And even then, quit painting them all with the same brush.

Oh, and go see the darn movie. It may be watered down but that makes me happy. When we can have romantic comedies starring African-Americans that are just as so-so as those starring Caucasians – we're come a long way. And by so-so let's talk about anything starring that chick from Grey's Anatomy (27 dresses), half of Julia Roberts' (Duplicity) and Meg Ryan's (French Kiss) movies, that last movie with Sarah Jessica Parker (Did you hear about the Morgans) and something awful I saw with Amy Adams (Leap Year). I think we deserve the chance to be equally "just okay". I can't wait to check it out. Most of the folks I know that have seen advanced screenings enjoyed it. I personally love a BougieTale of romance up on the big screen.

So BougieLand, thoughts on the professional athlete? Have I altered your view of them and the women that date them at all? Who's planning on seeing "Just Wright"? The floor is yours.

38 comments:

Inkognegro said...

Yeah, Ill be there...but ill be annoyed. The gender typing is MAD thick, the basketball scenes look Like Mike Esque and the idea of Queen Latifah and Common creating romantic Chemistry is almost as laughable as the idea of Common being an NBA mega-star. But Ill be there. They'll get it right if we give them enough chances.

Javalicious said...

Seriously - could you write your autobiography? That has got to be a tell-all bellseller headed for the big screen. By the way, you can name drop here - we won't tell anybody ;-)

LikeLena said...

::applause:: My brother was a professional athlete so I was around them all the time, the ones doing wrong get far more press than those doing right. And just like you said - my brother's career was over in 3 years and he was 26 so he had to figure out what to do with himself to be productive for the rest of his life. Thanks for writing this - it's not all bling and hoes and VIP.

Grace said...

Cannot wait for the movie - now if we could get a six more like it in the same year ;-)

UDK said...

Sorry Bouge - athletes suck. Did you see the story on Lawrence Taylor today - nuff said.

OneChele said...

There you go - "suspension of disbelief". That's all we need for 90 minutes.

jake said...

One year of AAA before injury ending my big league dreams - it's pretty much exactly what you said - good, bad and ugly with more good than anything else.
For the record, I will go watch Queen Latifah in whatever she does, don't care what team she's playing for - that's a good-looking woman.

OneChele said...

Hmm, an autobiography?! First I need legal counsel because I'm telling the truth on folks and they are not gonna like it. :)

Toni Child said...

I agree with your post. Yes some of these guys are jerks, etc. but I think that people often generalize without actually knowing any of these people.

I have friends that are professional athletes and they don't act like that. When they are out of the spotlight, they are home, kicked back, and living "normal" lives.

Liselle said...

Okay, I can see what you're coming with and I'd like to give the movie a shot.

Andrea M said...

My ex is a prof. boxer - one day he was a gym rat and no one gave a damn, the next day all sorts of promoters, managers and groupies came out of the woodwork. I've never seen anything like it before. We broke up because I couldn't give up my whole life to follow him around and long distance didn't work not because he cheated or went crazy. But then a gain, he has a strong two-parent household from the middle class backing him up. A lot of athletes (especially boxers) don't have that.

brendakay50 said...

Not nuff said, UDK!

How do you possibly tie in Lawrence Taylor and what he's been charged with ~ to ALL athletes? With that line of logic, are you going to say that since Lawrence Taylor is a black man and has been accused of rape, that now all Black men are potential rapists?

Did you actually read OneChele's article all the way through?

Just damn folks, it's 2010 ~ can we possibly get beyond painting EVERYONE with a broad brush, because of one or two or even 100 knuckleheads in a particular group or race do something stupid or ignorant.

guest said...

Do you know of any professional athletes who are going to have Latifah not Paula on their arm? Cmon now.

OneChele said...

Hey guest. Thanks for stopping in. You may want to disguise your biases a wee bit better. The guys over at VSB.com (http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/just-wright-makes-sense-to-me/) said it best: "All you need to fall for somebody is time and opportunity". And for the record, Paula Patton is probably a size 2. Latifah an 18. I'm closer to a Queen Latifah build then a Paula Patton and I got the guys. All up on their arms. I saw all flavor of woman with these athletes some of which at first glance I thought - huh? But you never know when that spark is gonna hit. Feel free to come back and introduce yourself.

Rob said...

One of my boys plays for the Jets right now, he earns 10x what I do. But he's been with the same girl for 5 years and is the nicest guy you ever want to meet. Me on the other hand - I'm an asshole and a bit of a dog. Lately, I don't date the same girl for 5 days let alone years. So go figure.
I'll go see the movie because that's a date flick. Dinner, 2 drinks, this movie - I'm an enlightened man for the night. Come on now, that's a good date.

rozb said...

Yay Chele! Handled that very well, I must say...

BB Waite said...

Chele - we had a conversation a few months ago about how people ended up together - what was the phrase you used?

rickyfontain said...

I don't think most men have biases against the athletes but we do tend to have them about the females. Because women so often claim to have standards but when a slam dunkin millionair enters the scene all of a sudden it doesn't matter that he never graduated from college and can barley string together a coherent sentence. What happend to your standards? Truth is if you date a pro athelet you will be considered a gold digger until proven otherwise.

OneChele said...

Few things are wrong with your argument. What if the athlete can speak well and DID graduate from college? What if the woman knew the man since junior high school when he was on the JV team? Why do I (or others) have to be called a gold digger because you can't see the whole picture? What if I have my own gold? You don't know because you already put me in a category just because of who you saw me with. Think outside the box.

OneChele said...

The phrase I used was one told to me by my male friends: Everybody can get got. In other words, no one is out of your league.

rickyfontain said...

Well that's why I said until proven other wise. But as far as knowing someone before they were a star. Really doesn't mean a lot. You think LeBron's girl hasn't known since he was 14 that he was NBA bound. The ESPN cameras filming his high school games and the free Hummer might have tipped her off. I just sayin, I know nobody likes to be called a gold digger, but truth is if these dudes were 9 to 5in it, 9 times out of 10 they wouldn't be with the women they are with. But trust me I'm not tryin to start an conversation about women and money. Getting a women to admit that money matters is about as easy as gettin a women to admit her true weight.

Ola said...

I plan to see this movie because I love Queen Latifah and because Common is iCandy. The story can be all fluff as far as I'm concerned.

OneChele said...

Not everyone is a break out athlete and goes pro and tt's not always about the money but we'll just agree to disagree lest I end up sharing a whole lot of folks business. Sure women like money, guys like boobs and butts. Neither of us always gets what we want. Personally, having dated both athletes and 9 - to- 5 guys, I'm good with either. But we've already established that I'm a special and extraordinary human being. ;-)

Steve said...

You already knew that brothers that got "passed over" by a girl trying to get to a baller were going to come on and throw shade. You knew this, bless your heart. It's called hate. According to Cube folks are waitin' ta do it...
Problem lies with the girls who would do anything to get those guys and the players who take advantage - that's what we see and it's not attractive. Your story doesn't have enough foolishness so it gets no love.
Great post and I'm going to see the movie to support black artists. Like you said, they should be allowed to put out just okay stuff too.

Opinoinated said...

Can we agree that a system that makes young, fatherless black boys millionaires at age 21 is counterproductive to their maturity?

rickyfontain said...

I've never been passed over by a female tryin to get to a baller. I don't hang out in the VIP rooms of bougie night clubs where these bubble heads congregate in search of child support annuities. :-)

Leon X said...

Funny you mentioned Just Wright. Yesterday Hip Hop Media Assassin Harry Allen held an impromptu poll on Twitter regarding the premise of Common being a ball player and Queen Latifah being his love interest. http://bit.ly/dkUuTu This sparked a blog post by Jo Nubian regarding the subject of Queen Latifah's attractiveness. http://bit.ly/aC8fEZ After that was posted Harry Allen sparked a discussion with Jo Nubian regarding his initial Twitter post (no, I don't have a link for that).

GrownAzzMan said...

Great post!
In my career I have had the chance to have several professional athletes and ex-pro athletes as clients and they are very much real people with high profile jobs and bank accounts with a few extra zeros. Of course I read the newspaper so I know about the bad side too. Unfortunately this side is all most folks know or are interested in.
As for the movie, since I HATE sports movies (that could be a post of its own) and am not a big fan of romantic comedies, I will only go if I am dragged there but I do hope it does well. I hope I am wrong but it looks like bro chooses the goldigger over Latifah's character. As Michelle would say 'LeSigh'

OneChele said...

There is no such thing as a bougie nightclub. Perhaps a lounge or a private party? A roof-top martini bar? A winery? I've never witnessed the bubble-heads and can't even positively identify what one of those might be. But I haven't been "in da club" in more than a minute so what do I know? By the by, true bougie chicks don't look for child support. We look for lifemates who may one day be so lucky as to father our children. But that's a whole other post.

Stank_0 said...

If what you say can be proven to be factually untrue, then you can be sued.

rickyfontain said...

Lounge, Roof-top martini bar = Bougie night club with a different marketing plan. :-)

Diana said...

We can agree that you can't spell and you are generalizing.

brownstocking said...

I'm pissy, but I'll go. I mean I skipped the Death At A Funeral redux, so I owe a non-TP movie some money. I just don't like the idea of Latifah or Common, just not sizzling hot to me. We need more real-sized sistas on the screen for some diversity of flava.

sunt97 said...

To be honest most players are looking for their trophy wifey and not a wife. Yeah we have knuckleheads all over the place looking stupid, doing stupid things ( think Ricki Williams is insane), but what do you expect when a few million is tossed in your direction. Most people go buck wild for a minute before realtiy slaps them in the back of the head and by that point they have married the wrong chick and have squandered a large part of their money. Gold diggers will always be around trying to move on up and these sthletes need to learn who is a somebody that they are going to be able to count on when the chips are down. Or how about let's just wait till about 4-5 years into the career to get married.

Tiffany
Peace, Love and Chocolate
http://liferequiresmorechocolate.com

rickyfontain said...

I don't think most men have biases against the athletes but we do tend to have them about the females. Because women so often claim to have standards but when a slam dunkin millionair enters the scene all of a sudden it doesn't matter that he never graduated from college and can barley string together a coherent sentence. What happend to your standards? Truth is if you date a pro athelet you will be considered a gold digger until proven otherwise.

OneChele said...

We've definitely starting seeing an uptick in the AA Rom-Com volume this year as opposed to the past 8 years. Here's hoping for more.

OneChele said...

Few things are wrong with your argument. What if the athlete can speak well and DID graduate from college? What if the woman knew the man since junior high school when he was on the JV team? Why do I (or others) have to be called a gold digger because you can't see the whole picture? What if I have my own gold? You don't know because you already put me in a category just because of who you saw me with. Think outside the box.

OneChele said...

Few things are wrong with your argument. What if the athlete can speak well and DID graduate from college? What if the woman knew the man since junior high school when he was on the JV team? Why do I (or others) have to be called a gold digger because you can't see the whole picture? What if I have my own gold? You don't know because you already put me in a category just because of who you saw me with. Think outside the box.

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