There is so much wrong with television today. I've have harped on reality shows and "news" (yes it deserves quotes). But it occurred to me last night that there is an entire subsection of television in need of a bougivention: Commercials. These 30 or 60-second (stretching to 3 or 5 minutes after midnight?!) spots should be informative, non-abrasive, entertaining and most of all back a product people could envision themselves purchasing. Here are a few commercials that don't make the cut in BougieLand:
Popeye's with "Chicken Annie": The Post-Racial Setback
Who at Popeye's HQ saw this and gave the green light? Chicken Annie is a thinner version of Mammy and Aunt Jemima… we are not amused. All she needs to do now is don a bandanna and find a way to slip a quote about "birthing babies" into the dialogue. We don't need a fast-talking, shucking 'n jiving sister shilling fried chicken. Fried chicken quite honestly sells itself. Why don't you get a dancing frog announcing for 2-for1 coupons while playing the banjo? This way you only offend dancing, banjo-picking frogs.
The Snuggie: The For-Who-For-Whatter
The fact that this thing is a best seller floors me. If it is cold 1) turn up the heat 2) put on more clothes 3) get a BLANKET 4) get next to someone warm. Ya'll do realize if you put a robe on backwards, it's this mess? And you're still buying it? In cheap blue and red fleece? Not bougie. Not sexy. Whoever invented this thing is laughing all the way to the bank. Men, if you own one and wear it just turn in your player card with your bougiepass on your way outta BougieLand. I'm. Just. Saying.
The Slap-Chop: The "What did he just say?"
Beyond the fact that this product has received some the worst reviews known to man, the pitchman (of Shamwow fame) is the most annoying dude with a voice that just grates after about fifteen seconds. Somewhere in here while talking about how wonderfully this thing chops he pauses and actually says, "You're gonna love my nuts." *crickets* Nuff said.
This next item I don't have a commercial for and if I did, I would not show it. One of my friends on twitter sent it to me as a sign in the serious moral decline of society and I had to agree.
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I can't think of any good reason for this product to exist. There can NOT seriously be anyone out there who aspires for their little girl to grow up and strip. Truthfully, I'm struck speechless by the inappropriateness of this. I could (and may) do an entire week on the trend of hyper-sexualization of young girls in society. But for now I'll just say- someone go get the belt. Whoever come up with this is ripe for a beatdown.
Any commercials/products grating on your last nerve lately?
9 comments:
OMG IS THAT POLE DANCER DOLL REAL..is it for CHILDREN..I CANNOT ..I REFUSE....
As far as the popeyes commercial..I HATE THAT COMMERCIAL..have you seen the tracfone commercial. one girl is asian and the other teen is a neck bobbing black girl
WTF
*starts slow hand clap* True and true. Someone deserves shotgun blast for that doll.
No, I do not own (nor will I) a Snuggie.
You got that right Sister. Go get the belt. LOL
Shameful! And the parent who buys the pole dance doll is even more shameful. WTF???
You get 'em Chele, that Popeye's chick is ridiculous. And someone had the nerve to say black people are being too sensitive about it...
*smh* 'awe struck, shocked and appauld'@ the pole dance doll, get.the.heck.outta.here. so sad, so sad.
*guilty* I'm attracted to the snuggie, won't buy it but am intrigued and if I found it somewhere for like $1, I'd buy it, lol.
the rest of the commericals are a crying shame, perfect for MADTv and SNL to pick up and have fun with.
What is our world coming to?
Why did I see the Snuggie at Costco? The funny thing is Consumer Reports did a write-up on the 'monk dress' and if memory serves me correctly, it didn't last past 2 washes.
For the parent who buys a pole dancing baby doll...forget the belt, I'm going to get a switch! Better yet, I should make them go pick it, and they better bring back a good one!
I love that the box tells her to go up and down, round and round! Love it! I'm buying one for my 5 year old niece. insert side eye here
wow funny as hell as always and yes these are all sad, which is why i am known among my friends and fam as the Mute-the -commercial chick i try never watch them because they are just a waste of time, i particularly hate the Kool-aid battles the "purple" soda (mean side eye o_0 to the kool-aid marketing team YES we noticed that is was grape soda and kool-aid fighting over the black man and his son). the stipper pole thats just wrong on so many levels, according to my dad the woman in the commercials owns alot of Popeyes thats why she does the commercials, but i dont know the way keeps trying to sell "sweet tea" (as if corporate america can perfect sweet tea o_0 ) makes me wonder
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